firehawk_1 Posted May 5, 2012 Share Posted May 5, 2012 so, does anyone know any good websites that have decent people or that has worked for you in regards to finding relationships? ive tried them all I think. match, okcupid, eharmony... nada. disappointment really. I almost came very very close.... man it felt good but she turned out a complete whack job in the end. so anyway - anyone has any sites they can recommend? For those of you who are in a long distance relationship - where did you meet him/her? thanks Link to post Share on other sites
Author firehawk_1 Posted May 6, 2012 Author Share Posted May 6, 2012 no one huh? ...... Link to post Share on other sites
HeavenOrHell Posted May 6, 2012 Share Posted May 6, 2012 Works better for me making friends on sites which are to do with my way of life/personality rather than a general dating site, general dating sites do nothing for me. What are your likes/interests/beliefs? Maybe look for sites tailored to those? I've also found facebook a good place to meet like minded people. Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted May 6, 2012 Share Posted May 6, 2012 I good way to meet people with similar interests is thru meetup . com Link to post Share on other sites
Author firehawk_1 Posted May 6, 2012 Author Share Posted May 6, 2012 Thanks. believe me I hear you about dating sites. for years ive been on them and guess what? wasted more money! I really should get some award here for making the effort and getting kicked in the nuts every time my interests/hobbies arent much because im always working (love what I do) - and I am self employed so it makes it harder. I will try meetup - never heard of it. But still, I wish there was a site where there are genuine legitmate people. im sure you wish the same too. far too many fakes and timewasters just ruining it all then they wonder why they cant find someone. *sigh* any other sites or suggestions are welcome Link to post Share on other sites
Mme. Chaucer Posted May 6, 2012 Share Posted May 6, 2012 I'm sure every single website has flakes and fakes. Meetups will also. Sad, but true. Good news is that every site and other venues as well also have genuine people … like you yourself, right? I am married to a man I met on Match.com. I also met some nice men who weren't a match for me, and I met a potentially dangerous stalkerish freak. No website or other avenue for meeting a mate is going to guarantee anything. You need to just keep "fishing" and beware of putting all your eggs in one basket until it's really and truly warranted to do so. Make sure that the rest of your life is as good as it can be for you - that you are taking good care of your own health, body and mind, and even your spiritual life so that the inevitable let-downs of trying to date don't dominate. Keep trying! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author firehawk_1 Posted May 6, 2012 Author Share Posted May 6, 2012 Thank you. I appreciate that. well lucky you... at least you met and got married to someone on a website match doesnt work for me. then british people dont for me (mentality, negitive/bitter/unrealistic attitude in everything especially when it comes to dating and relationships why dont exist over here). it really does take it out of you and there is no need at all. it has consequences and people dont see it. ive tried ALOT over the years. you have no idea but there comes a point where..."thats it" you know? I do try and my recent past (very recent past) proves it too. haha Link to post Share on other sites
Author firehawk_1 Posted May 6, 2012 Author Share Posted May 6, 2012 i really feel so lost. :-/ just.... i know what I want but always get trampled on in some way. its like they are far better and superior and im missing out. i dunno. just... i dont have the good feeling anymore or anything.... i dunno. just... lost and worthless. its how its been made to feel. hmm. Link to post Share on other sites
FitChick Posted May 6, 2012 Share Posted May 6, 2012 There is an activity site in the UK that is supposed to be good. You meet in real life and actually do things with other people. Link to post Share on other sites
Author firehawk_1 Posted May 6, 2012 Author Share Posted May 6, 2012 Thanks FitChick. much appreciated. I will check it out for sure. in regards to relationships, especially international... that would be good Link to post Share on other sites
speedycat Posted May 6, 2012 Share Posted May 6, 2012 Well, be careful, there are few successful stories out of thousands of sad experience by dating website. Too complicated to explain, but be careful! Link to post Share on other sites
Author firehawk_1 Posted May 6, 2012 Author Share Posted May 6, 2012 believe me, I know VERY well.... Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted May 6, 2012 Share Posted May 6, 2012 Well, be careful, there are few successful stories out of thousands of sad experience by dating website. Too complicated to explain, but be careful! I'm a success story as well... I met my wife on match and after we got married we had a son.. Been married almost 5 years.. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author firehawk_1 Posted May 6, 2012 Author Share Posted May 6, 2012 lucky for some Link to post Share on other sites
ladyabstrused Posted May 7, 2012 Share Posted May 7, 2012 Don't give up firehawk. I know you may have been let down many times before this. Sometimes it takes many falls to find one rare beautiful person with a good heart. If you don't keep your mind open, then you are just closing all the doors to the possibilities of finding one. But of course, do be careful. With all the experience you've had from before, make use of your skills that you have picked up from your past relationships to ensure that you don't get burned again. Link to post Share on other sites
Author firehawk_1 Posted May 7, 2012 Author Share Posted May 7, 2012 thanks lady. I think 7 years of trying is more than enough and not been given a chance either.... a fair chance at that, says enough. yes ive taken a break and what not but again, only so much you can do. with todays mentality, its all about hurting people and not considering anyone but themselves...and to go from one person to the next - just like that. ive paid my dues.... i totally deserve someone and I do have the right to say that i have not experienced what others *seem* to experience because again, i never get a chance. i always make the 150% efffort but only to be let down time and time again. recently, went all out to show my effort, but cost me thousands of dollars as that got canceled in the end because of how they turned out to be. damned if you do, damned if you dont. i keep hearing people meet and are in relationships etc... - i never have experienced that really. day in, day out... on my own. again, only so much one can do and today seems to be that no one actually listens or understands - that communication no longer exists. sorry for the babbling (and my feelings...).... Link to post Share on other sites
ladyabstrused Posted May 7, 2012 Share Posted May 7, 2012 7 years is a very long time, firehawk. It must be quite exhausting for you. If you feel and you know that you deserve someone, then keep telling yourself that. You'll be surprised at what may come when you have a positive mindset and you give out positive vibes. Don't be sorry for "babbling" cos you weren't. I think this is a place where each of us have a right to let it all out, right? Keep having faith. There is someone out there for you, but you have to believe it and keep searching. Maybe you need a bit more patience because people nowadays are not like before, you're right. It will take time for you to find that person. But sometimes I tell my friends who feel the same way you do, to not expect so much because things happen when you least expect it. Cos that's what happened to me. And that's what happened to my best friend too when she stopped expecting to meet someone so much. Maybe you can try this too? Just expect to meet new people and make new friends. Then from there maybe something may spark. I do wish you good luck in finding the right one. Link to post Share on other sites
Author firehawk_1 Posted May 7, 2012 Author Share Posted May 7, 2012 Thanks Lady - thats nice and kind of you. I appreciate that. well trust me, ive even stopped looking before, many times, and nothing. you try - nothing. you try harder - nothing. its like a big game and someone is having an evil laugh at my expense on every level. as you said, people are not as what they used to be nowadays.... makes it virtually impossible. i dunno. just... all i know is im part of this "social cleansing" thats going on and no one wants to listen or understand. its all about fakeness and playing around. Link to post Share on other sites
ladyabstrused Posted May 7, 2012 Share Posted May 7, 2012 What if you continue trying but not expect much? Then you won't be at any extremes. You'll be in the middle. And you won't be too disappointed if nothing deep gets out of these friendships. Like keep searching for decent people and have in mind that you just want to make new friends first. So then you will have many new friends and slowly, I'm sure you'll be able to know if any of them you're interested in would be decent for you? Perhaps you should keep trying and keep us updated on your progress. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author firehawk_1 Posted May 7, 2012 Author Share Posted May 7, 2012 Thanks lady ive tried that too... believe me. but still no go. sorry for the downer of responses, im just saying how it is and whats happened Link to post Share on other sites
ladyabstrused Posted May 7, 2012 Share Posted May 7, 2012 Well then I hope for the best for you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author firehawk_1 Posted May 7, 2012 Author Share Posted May 7, 2012 lol thanks. there is no hope..... haha. any site suggestions still welcome Link to post Share on other sites
Mme. Chaucer Posted May 7, 2012 Share Posted May 7, 2012 I know you're down, and we all can get down. But your defeatist and victimized perspective aren't helping you find a girlfriend. I'm not blaming you for feeling the way you do - but it's up to you to figure out how to get to a different place. Work on having a great life, and having pride in yourself, and relationships with people besides a girlfriend that nurture you. People who feel very bad about themselves do attract people who are going to make it even worse … Link to post Share on other sites
Author firehawk_1 Posted May 7, 2012 Author Share Posted May 7, 2012 (edited) thanks. i understand. I am fine with everything else, career/professional and pride but... what can I say? there is no excuse for the other party to treat someone bad at all you know? its like you are meant to be perfect and you should "just know" - but reality is, it isnt like that. i dunno. of course I will feel down, because I am a human with real feelings and not fake optimism or fake feelings. i ask for a simple thing. i get negitive/bad back constantly. it is no wonder there are far too many unhappy people who cant find something. i try, you dont know how much and what I do in that i think after years of being let down/rejected etc... i do have the basic right of feeling the way I do. Edited May 7, 2012 by firehawk_1 Link to post Share on other sites
ladyabstrused Posted May 7, 2012 Share Posted May 7, 2012 People who feel very bad about themselves do attract people who are going to make it even worse … I do find this true to a large extent honestly. Link to post Share on other sites
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