rightintentions17 Posted June 22, 2004 Share Posted June 22, 2004 What is my issue. I know what to say.. I know once i say it i could keep a convo going.. I know i could probably even manage a number.. BUT.. but, and its a BIG BUT.... I cant bring myself to initiate the conversation starter. I know if she started it, I would be all over the convo.. but that isnt going to happen. I seriously need a swift kick in the ass or something.. I dont understand what is holding me back.. WHy am i so f***ing nervous... I am not that bad looking (i guess? Although i dont really like judging myself), I have been told I have a great personality.. so i dont know why im so nervous. I seriously need some motivation here.. Or something... or i dont know, im getting really frustrated over myself, and am regretting not saying anything. Link to post Share on other sites
HokeyReligions Posted June 22, 2004 Share Posted June 22, 2004 You are looking for help to start a conversation with a girl? What do you want to know about her? Ask her questions about herself. What things do you want to talk about? Just walk up to her and say Hi. Some conversations starters: Have you seen [insert name] movie yet? That test in [insert name]'s class was [easy, hard, damn near impossible, a breeze] Did you see [insert name] shoes, dress, hair-cut, car....? I was talking to [insert name] about atheistic existentialism and Kierkagard, what do you think about that? Do you like my socks? Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted June 22, 2004 Share Posted June 22, 2004 <<<<<<< In his Joey from Friends voice >>>>>>>>>>"How are you doin?" Why don't you just approach her and say you're with the release the twins foundation......ok, enough joking.......seriously, Compliment her on her clothes, eyes, hair......then talk about the place your in, the weather, what does she do for a living....so on and so on..... Link to post Share on other sites
HokeyReligions Posted June 22, 2004 Share Posted June 22, 2004 Originally posted by Moose <<<<<<< In his Joey from Friends voice >>>>>>>>>>"How are you doin?" Why don't you just approach her and say you're with the release the twins foundation......ok, enough joking.......seriously, Compliment her on her clothes, eyes, hair......then talk about the place your in, the weather, what does she do for a living....so on and so on..... *snort! "release the twins foundation" I haven't heard anything like that in eons! Link to post Share on other sites
edweirdo Posted June 22, 2004 Share Posted June 22, 2004 I always liked Zaphod Beeblebrox's pick up line, "Hey Doll, is this guy boring you? Why don't you come and talk to me, I'm from a different planet." (sorry, couldn't resist) Link to post Share on other sites
Author rightintentions17 Posted June 22, 2004 Author Share Posted June 22, 2004 "What do you want to know about her? Ask her questions about herself. What things do you want to talk about? Just walk up to her and say Hi. " i dont need to know what to say, i have plenty to say, my problem is just saying it. And thx for your response Link to post Share on other sites
Fayebelle Posted June 22, 2004 Share Posted June 22, 2004 Is this when you're alone w/ a girl or in a group dynamic? Groups are great b/c you can literally bump into them -you know like a brush when you walk by. Then you can start w/ excuse me and continue from there (the excuse me is natural manners and should come w/out thought). Alone- give her a minute and she'll start for you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author rightintentions17 Posted June 22, 2004 Author Share Posted June 22, 2004 anyone got any tips for battling the nervousness.. or am i just going to have to deal. and does it get easier after time? Link to post Share on other sites
Fayebelle Posted June 22, 2004 Share Posted June 22, 2004 BREATHE! And smile- that way even if you are nervous you won't LOOK like you are. Sometimes knowing you look relaxed actually helps you feel relaxed. And yes- after a while it will get easier. Link to post Share on other sites
Author rightintentions17 Posted June 23, 2004 Author Share Posted June 23, 2004 i just wish i knew why i always lock up, even though i know what to say, i just cant get myself to open my mouth. Im working on it. il just.. breathe.. Link to post Share on other sites
undecided Posted June 23, 2004 Share Posted June 23, 2004 if the girl is new to you, you dont know much about her sooo start conversations with a question. i mean you need to find out stuff about her eventually. like what are her career plans, jobs, education, hobbies, where she has been... just dont touch on anything about exes yet. and remember what she says. you need these facts for future conversations. Link to post Share on other sites
valhalla Posted June 23, 2004 Share Posted June 23, 2004 your problem is fear.... fear is good when it protects us from danger, but fear at times can be crippling.....you are gonna have to work thru this, and face your fear to overcome it. dont put so much pressure on yourself for one thing, meeting potential boyfriend/girlfriends should be fun, give yourself a break and just say hello, and the conversation will start.....trust me the girl will not physically assault you, or curse you out for saying hello, you will just need to work on this and gradually you will find you no longer dread talkinjg to new people Link to post Share on other sites
HoldOn Posted June 23, 2004 Share Posted June 23, 2004 This might sound stupid, but have you ever tried practicing in a mirror. If you have a really good friend who won't make fun of you, you could practice with him. Also, remind yourself that it's just a conversation and it's not the end of the world. Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted June 23, 2004 Share Posted June 23, 2004 Sorry, I have to say this, it's from my 16 year old....., " Hey babe, I'm no Barney Rubble, but I bet I could make your, "BedRock"........his Mom fell out of her chair when he said that....... Link to post Share on other sites
Author rightintentions17 Posted June 23, 2004 Author Share Posted June 23, 2004 ahah classic thx for the responses! Link to post Share on other sites
Author rightintentions17 Posted June 23, 2004 Author Share Posted June 23, 2004 and val, you pretty much summed up how i feel. like exactly. -i put a lot of pressure on myself.. -i think they might snap at me or something -and i pretty much dread talking to new people but im working on it Link to post Share on other sites
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