lilhope Posted June 22, 2004 Share Posted June 22, 2004 I started to get really close to this guy. It has been going on for almost a year now. In April he said he loved me on the night I was leaving to go on a trip. When I returned, he still said he loved me (of course I said it back) but started to pull away. Now out of nowhere he says that he doesn't think that its loves, that he thinks of me as a best friend but he is not sure if that could change or not. I just don't get it. We were talking every night on the phone up until last week. When I told him I felt him pulling back, that is when he mentioned the friends thing. Yet he wants nothing to change. He still wants to talk to me at least 3 times a week. And see me when we can (Long distance relationship). He said that he wasn't closing the door on more happening..... I just don't understand how you can say I love you and then oops sorry, I'm not sure. And do I hang on to a hope that may not even be there. Help. Link to post Share on other sites
cinnamonstix49 Posted June 23, 2004 Share Posted June 23, 2004 Maybe he is afraid to get too close to her because it is a long distance relationship, maybe he is afraid that he will hurt or lose you, or get hurt himself. I think you should hang in there, but don't let him step all over you, you should tell him how you feel about this, ask him where you stand. Link to post Share on other sites
theONE Posted June 23, 2004 Share Posted June 23, 2004 Maybe he doesn't know where you stand and is pulling back because he's afraid of caring to much. Maybe he thinks you were going to put him in that "friend zone" so he did it before you could. I'm a guy i've seen it done it, and heard about it before. Once we get into a girls friend zone its almost impossible to get out. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lilhope Posted June 24, 2004 Author Share Posted June 24, 2004 Thank you. I had asked him where we stand that is how I got the "friends, though nothing changes" line. I told him that I thought he was pulling away, he said that he thought I was. Which I didn't think I was doing for one minute. He did said that he was afraid that he didn't want to lose me and doesn't want to risk getting serious and then losing what we have right now. Which I can respect but I don't want to sit here with the false hope of something more when he already has it in his head that it is stay in the friends stage. And you are right, if I bump him down to just my friend there is slim to no chance of that changing. So do I believe that he does love me and doesn't want to get hurt and work on letting him know that he won't lose me or do I try (which being hurt right now will be more than hard) the friends thing. Another question, how do you be friends with NOTHING changing? Link to post Share on other sites
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