Radu Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 And that's all I asked for. Thank you. So I have to be attractive, interesting and fun to be around. The sexual/romantically compatible is an unknown till that stuff actually happens. I'm pretty much screwed on the attractive part so I have to somehow figure out how to be interesting enough and fun to be around to make up for my lack of attractiveness. And you won't be fun untill you lose the defeatist attitude. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 And you won't be fun untill you lose the defeatist attitude. And I won't lose it until I have fun. Hey, merry go rounds are fun right? Seriously though, the defeatist thing isn't with me 24/7. I have no problem being and having fun with people, especially girls I like. My online presence, is almost nothing like how I am in real life. Link to post Share on other sites
threebyfate Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 Another favourite, Gabriel Aubry. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
snug.bunny Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 OP, your physical type is a kitten? That is the picture I see in your album. (I'm slow, lol) I don't feel like searcing for pictures to post, but, I am most drawn to a man's face it's the first thing I notice myself focusing on (his eyes, facial expressions, smile, etc.). Ryan Reynolds Chris Evans Taylor Lautner Channing Tatum Sam Worthington Ryan Phillippe Shia Saide LaBeouf 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 If that's all you were going to say, then why post anything at all? Unless you get some sick enjoyment out of telling me how nobody at my college is going to want to date me. I answered because the poster you quoted asked you what you had to offer a woman and why you were still in college at 30, and you asked, "First tell me what women actually want, then I could say why one would date me". So I answered based on what 20-year-old me in college (the demographic you seek to date) would have wanted of an older man (which you currently are to those girls). It's just ONE sample, but no one else was answering at the time, so I thought I'd do you the favour. Seems like I should not have bothered. Link to post Share on other sites
udolipixie Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 And that's all I asked for. Thank you. So I have to be attractive, interesting and fun to be around. The sexual/romantically compatible is an unknown till that stuff actually happens. I'm pretty much screwed on the attractive part so I have to somehow figure out how to be interesting enough and fun to be around to make up for my lack of attractiveness. If you were that age yes that's likely all you'd have to be. Considering you are you're most likely going to have to be more than that such as having a career, house, and car as those elements are generally expected from guys your age. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 If you were that age yes that's likely all you'd have to be. Considering you are you're most likely going to have to be more than that such as having a career, house, and car as those elements are generally expected from guys your age. Yeah, life doesn't do rewinds - and I could pretend to be 16 all I like, heck I look it according to the Caucasians around me, but that doesn't make it true. To be fair, I think the elements I mentioned looking for in older men were fairly superficial preferences (except perhaps for emotional maturity), but I was a bit superficial when I was 20. I think many people in their early 20s are. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Eternal Sunshine Posted May 13, 2012 Author Share Posted May 13, 2012 OP, your physical type is a kitten? That is the picture I see in your album. (I'm slow, lol) I don't feel like searcing for pictures to post, but, I am most drawn to a man's face it's the first thing I notice myself focusing on (his eyes, facial expressions, smile, etc.). Ryan Reynolds Chris Evans Taylor Lautner Channing Tatum Sam Worthington Ryan Phillippe Shia Saide LaBeouf I removed him from my album because I know him in real life. Link to post Share on other sites
snug.bunny Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 I removed him from my album because I know him in real life. Ohhhh. Well the kitten is very cute nonetheless. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Eternal Sunshine Posted May 13, 2012 Author Share Posted May 13, 2012 Ohhhh. Well the kitten is very cute nonetheless. It's my kitten and I love him to death In fact, you could say that he is my type too Link to post Share on other sites
snug.bunny Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 It's my kitten and I love him to death In fact, you could say that he is my type too Awe, so cute! I have a kitty too, I wuv her. I am also thinking about adopting this wittle fella http://i49.tinypic.com/2d2aq9s.jpg Link to post Share on other sites
Author Eternal Sunshine Posted May 13, 2012 Author Share Posted May 13, 2012 Awww - go for it I would love a dog too, I am just afraid that I don't have enough time/space to look after him properly. I am also afraid of how he would get along with the kitty. My kitten is a bit territorial Link to post Share on other sites
snug.bunny Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 Awww - go for it I would love a dog too, I am just afraid that I don't have enough time/space to look after him properly. I am also afraid of how he would get along with the kitty. My kitten is a bit territorial I had a dog but he passed away over a year ago. I wasn't planning on getting another one anytime soon, but then I saw the dog I posted a pic of, and I heard his back story, and my heart sank. The good thing is, my cat isn't so much territorial as she is skittish/timid, and this dog is very timid too so I can't see them getting into any cat vs. dog altercations. I've gone off-topic, I'm naughty. Hopefully I won't get infracted. Back to OP - I love fluffy furry balls of cuteness and big ears. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 I had a dog but he passed away over a year ago. I wasn't planning on getting another one anytime soon, but then I saw the dog I posted a pic of, and I heard his back story, and my heart sank. The good thing is, my cat isn't so much territorial as she is skittish/timid, and this dog is very timid too so I can't see them getting into any cat vs. dog altercations. I've gone off-topic, I'm naughty. Hopefully I won't get infracted. Back to OP - I love fluffy furry balls of cuteness and big ears. Your avatar is certainly exceptionally sexy. Link to post Share on other sites
snug.bunny Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 Your avatar is certainly exceptionally sexy. It's the glasses. I know, I know. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 It's the glasses. I know, I know. I like the makeup, too. Link to post Share on other sites
snug.bunny Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 I like the makeup, too. How nice of you to notice! It's just a little pink blush to accentuate the nose and VO5 hot oil to make fur shiny. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 . So I answered based on what 20-year-old me in college (the demographic you seek to date) would have wanted of an older man (which you currently are to those girls). But that's not what I asked, is it? Did I ask what women want from older men? It's just ONE sample, but no one else was answering at the time, so I thought I'd do you the favour. Seems like I should not have bothered. I don't mind you answering, but as long as it's to a question I asked, and not something else. udolipixie was able to give me something useful. Either way, this whole discussion is off-topic for this thread. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 (edited) But that's not what I asked, is it? Did I ask what women want from older men? I don't mind you answering, but as long as it's to a question I asked, and not something else. udolipixie was able to give me something useful. Either way, this whole discussion is off-topic for this thread. You (and, to be fair, others) had already moved the entire discussion part-way into a 'HELP SD FIND A DATE' thread for the past few pages. Interesting that you only decide to cull the off-topic now. Personally, this thread appears to be more of a chat topic to me by now, with most people freely discussing whatever they want, so I've given up my efforts to not join them. There is such a thing as tailored advice given in context. If I were to hypothetically tell everyone that I was, for example, obese, then ask, "Why would a guy turn down a date with a girl??? These guys keep turning me down" repeatedly, would people who know me give me general reasons why guys turn down dates with girls? No, chances are they would tell me why they think guys are turning down dates with the hypothetical me - which would be that the hypothetical me is obese. In that case, it would benefit me much more to fix the obesity (and you CAN fix all the factors I mentioned, you know, far more easily than you can 'fix' height) instead of ignoring it, no? I don't understand why you keep sticking your head in the sand (after sometimes hurling offensive accusations at the responder) whenever there is a slightest hint of anyone saying anything that differs from your personal experience. Given that your 'personal experience' amounts solely to 'girls don't like me because I'm short and too nice', that is a lot of posts. It's interesting that you quote udolipixie, because she had repeatedly expressed her agreement with my answers. As usual, you just snipped out everything except the parts you agree with yourself. Edited May 13, 2012 by Elswyth 1 Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 You (and, to be fair, others) had already moved the entire discussion part-way into a 'HELP SD FIND A DATE' thread for the past few pages. Interesting that you only decide to cull the off-topic now. That's because I got a answer to my question and am considering making a thread to go into more detail. Also I don't want a mod to come in and give me an infraction for going off-topic. There is such a thing as tailored advice given in context. If I were to hypothetically tell everyone that I was, for example, obese, then ask, "Why would a guy turn down a date with a girl??? These guys keep turning me down" repeatedly, would people who know me give me general reasons why guys turn down dates with girls? No, chances are they would tell me why they think guys are turning down dates with the hypothetical me - which would be that the hypothetical me is obese. I don't understand why you keep sticking your head in the sand (after sometimes hurling offensive accusations at the responder) whenever there is a slightest hint of anyone saying anything that differs from your personal experience. Given that your 'personal experience' amounts solely to 'girls don't like me because I'm short and too nice', that is a lot of posts. It's interesting that you quote udolipixie, because she had repeatedly expressed her agreement with my answers. As usual, you just snipped out everything except the parts you agree with yourself. But, whatever. Serves me right for trying to return favours. Back to ignoring.Lets look at what udolipixie said if I was the same age as the girl. "attractive, interesting and fun to be around." And if I'm older "more than that such as having a career, house, and car." But of course I still have to be "attractive, interesting and fun to be around." Those requirements don't go away if I have a career, house and a car. I need to get the basics taken care of first then I can worry about the other things. And as I said a few times already, there was a time when I was the same age as the girls I was interested in, and they didn't like me then either. And I'm 100% sure that the reasons why they didn't like me when I'm young, are still valid for why they don't like me now. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 That is a fair post, one that actually addresses the post before it in a non-offensive manner. Thank you. Note that I did not just say 'career, house, and car' - there was 'life experience' and 'emotional maturity' in the mix. I think all of the above (as well as attractive, interesting, and fun to be around) could do with a bit of improvement, but we pretty much both agree that you're going after the wrong demographic here. No offense, but 30 sounds really old to someone who is 18-23 (as most undergrads are), and they are likely to have different expectations for you based on that. That piles on top of the reasons for that demographic not liking you in the first place when you were their age (which my guess is that young people are more likely to have more superficial requirements, because they don't know what is genuinely important for a relationship). Most of us also agreed that going out more and having more friends, especially those of the same sex of which you currently have none, would help you improve in a LOT of aspects. Considering how much off-topic has gone down here, I doubt we'd be the ones getting infractions, but fair point. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
udolipixie Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 And as I said a few times already, there was a time when I was the same age as the girls I was interested in, and they didn't like me then either. And I'm 100% sure that the reasons why they didn't like me when I'm young, are still valid for why they don't like me now. Most likely the reasons they didn't like you then was because you lacked several factors most expected from your age when you were in your 20s. Perhaps you're one of the many guys who is constantly playing catch up to where his is generally expected to be. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 but we pretty much both agree that you're going after the wrong demographic here. No offense, but 30 sounds really old to someone who is 18-23 (as most undergrads are), and they are likely to have different expectations for you based on that. That's the stuff that doesn't help and why I've continually asked you to forget my age in this thread. That piles on top of the reasons for that demographic not liking you in the first place when you were their age (which my guess is that young people are more likely to have more superficial requirements, because they don't know what is genuinely important for a relationship). So those girls are more superficial than the older ones. Most of us also agreed that going out more and having more friends, especially those of the same sex of which you currently have none, would help you improve in a LOT of aspects. I've got no reason to argue with you there. Considering how much off-topic has gone down here, I doubt we'd be the ones getting infractions, but fair point. That's what I figured. And I'm too lazy to come up with a thread now. Most likely the reasons they didn't like you then was because you lacked several factors most expected from your age when you were in your 20s. Perhaps you're one of the many guys who is constantly playing catch up to where his is generally expected to be. How do you figure? Any examples of what you're talking about? Link to post Share on other sites
udolipixie Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 How do you figure? Any examples of what you're talking about? I'm guessing it's a possibility with how it often seems you have a severe lack of understanding of gals, lack of experience with gals, lack of social skills, emotional maturity, the tidbit of having low self-esteem and confidence for quite some time, and how you haven't fulfilled the general expectations of an adult one has at your age. General example to me would be insisting on being judged by such as a 30 something guy wanting to be judged by a 20 something year old guys standards. Real life example would be this 45 year old guy I know who's experience with gals limited not by choice to escorts & prostitutes and gets laid monthly by paying prostitutes. He has the maturity of a 22 year old and when he was 22 he had the emotional maturity of a 12 year old. He continuously had emotional maturity far less than his age and failed at fulfilling the typical expectations along with having far less experience than was generally expected at his age. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted May 13, 2012 Share Posted May 13, 2012 I'm guessing it's a possibility with how it often seems you have a severe lack of understanding of gals, lack of experience with gals, lack of social skills, emotional maturity, the tidbit of having low self-esteem and confidence for quite some time, and how you haven't fulfilled the general expectations of an adult one has at your age. General example to me would be insisting on being judged by such as a 30 something guy wanting to be judged by a 20 something year old guys standards. Real life example would be this 45 year old guy I know who's experience with gals limited not by choice to escorts & prostitutes and gets laid monthly by paying prostitutes. He has the maturity of a 22 year old and when he was 22 he had the emotional maturity of a 12 year old. He continuously had emotional maturity far less than his age and failed at fulfilling the typical expectations along with having far less experience than was generally expected at his age. I was mainly asking about when I was young, early 20's, and how I would not have been where girls expected me to be. Link to post Share on other sites
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