joystickd Posted May 7, 2013 Share Posted May 7, 2013 I remember years ago I had got friendzoned. We talked and I had to hear in vivid detail her having sex with other guys. I mean dick size and number of orgasms she had. One day I got mad and fussed at her about it. I stopped talking to her and that day on I don't associate with women that say "let's just be friends". I'm not the gay guy that wants to hear about you having sex and goes shopping with you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
joystickd Posted May 7, 2013 Share Posted May 7, 2013 The guys that accept the friendship are suckers because they are accepting bad behavior. It's just a free ego boost and someone that will listen to all their problems. Link to post Share on other sites
Ufcrocks1969 Posted May 7, 2013 Share Posted May 7, 2013 You guys need to lighten up. If women did that to me it would turn me off too. All I see is pressure pressure. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
joystickd Posted May 7, 2013 Share Posted May 7, 2013 You guys need to lighten up. If women did that to me it would turn me off too. All I see is pressure pressure. Once you experience what its like then you won't be saying lighten up Link to post Share on other sites
Ufcrocks1969 Posted May 7, 2013 Share Posted May 7, 2013 Once you experience what its like then you won't be saying lighten up IRL or OLD? Link to post Share on other sites
Necris Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 You're still not listening she could introduce you to one of her friends eventually. It's called networking! In my personal experience this has never happened. The guys who get introduced are the guys who already have many options and they just want to help give him more. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
mortensorchid Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 Most likely, but don't be too quick to say. I dated a guy who was fairly good looking a few years ago and he turned out to be a complete and utter psycho. I attempted to think we might be friends of some kind, but no dice. He was probably the most condescending misogynistic man I'd ever met. I dropped him like a bad habit and he wouldn't stop bothering me for months afterward. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 In my personal experience this has never happened. The guys who get introduced are the guys who already have many options and they just want to help give him more. My personal experience over two decades of dating and many really wonderful platonic female friends concurs. I know what it's like to do that because my exW and I would occasionally 'put mutual friends together' at dinner parties we'd host. When I was single, never even came close to that. IME, when in what LS'ers describe as the friendzone, it was like being a receptacle for occasional suckling with just enough food tossed into the cage to keep from starving. Heh... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Mme. Chaucer Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 The guys that accept the friendship are suckers because they are accepting bad behavior. It's just a free ego boost and someone that will listen to all their problems. That's not really true, JS. Sometimes, it's worthwhile to "accept friendship." I hope you can distinguish between a person who just wants to be around guys who are mooning over her for an ego boost, and someone who you'd value in your life, and who'd value you in hers, but just not in a sexual or romantic way. It bums me out, reading all this crap about the stupid "friend zone." I deny its existence! 3 Link to post Share on other sites
hppr Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 In my personal experience this has never happened. The guys who get introduced are the guys who already have many options and they just want to help give him more. If you think about it us guys are similar, we aren't going to go introducing or vouching for women that we aren't attracted to on at least some level. The key difference is that guys are more willing to help out, especially when it comes to other guys looking for girls. As far as women's networks go...you use her network for your own ends, maybe involve her boyfriend but don't ask her for help. Link to post Share on other sites
Pompeii Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 I deny its existence! People believed that the universe was geocentric rather than heliocentric, too. Link to post Share on other sites
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 That's not really true, JS. Sometimes, it's worthwhile to "accept friendship." I hope you can distinguish between a person who just wants to be around guys who are mooning over her for an ego boost, and someone who you'd value in your life, and who'd value you in hers, but just not in a sexual or romantic way. It bums me out, reading all this crap about the stupid "friend zone." I deny its existence! You deny it because women are rarely put in the friendzone. It happens almost exclusively to guys. It certainly exists. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
hppr Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 Most likely, but don't be too quick to say. I dated a guy who was fairly good looking a few years ago and he turned out to be a complete and utter psycho. I attempted to think we might be friends of some kind, but no dice. He was probably the most condescending misogynistic man I'd ever met. I dropped him like a bad habit and he wouldn't stop bothering me for months afterward. Yeah there are girls out there like that too. Looks is a valuable commodity in dating, just as valuable as being wealthy or having a good personality. "Well, he/she is a total prick, but they are nice and fun sometimes too, and very attractive..." so they put up with it until they can't take it anymore. As far as him being condescending, mysognistic, well, he can get away with it. I guarantee you he doesn't sleep alone for very long at a time. Link to post Share on other sites
Author TheBigQuestion Posted May 8, 2013 Author Share Posted May 8, 2013 Friend-zoning isn't a new concept. Link to post Share on other sites
regster Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 You deny it because women are rarely put in the friendzone. It happens almost exclusively to guys. It certainly exists. A woman's friendzone is being used for sex. Few men will turn that down since men tend to value sex before other better qualities. So no, friendzoning for women isnt as frequent as the type described in this thread but dont think men are the only ones who deal with such sucky behavior. Ive also heard a few of my female friends talk about being actively friendzoned with no sex due to not being hot enough. Link to post Share on other sites
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 A woman's friendzone is being used for sex. Few men will turn that down since men tend to value sex before other better qualities. So no, friendzoning for women isnt as frequent as the type described in this thread but dont think men are the only ones who deal with such sucky behavior. Ive also heard a few of my female friends talk about being actively friendzoned with no sex due to not being hot enough. Hate to burst your bubble, but women like sex. They get just as much out of it as the men do (if not more). FWB is not the friendzone. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
KathyM Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 I think I'd agree with the OP. Most guys do get friendzoned because they're not attractive enough. That's been the experience with the women I know, that the guys who became friends of the family or friends in general were rejected as romantic partners, but kept as friends. One guy became friendzoned because he was a bad kisser. Sometimes, though, they were friendzoned after a relationship was attempted, and one of the partners realized the person was not a match. Link to post Share on other sites
Author TheBigQuestion Posted May 8, 2013 Author Share Posted May 8, 2013 Hate to burst your bubble, but women like sex. They get just as much out of it as the men do (if not more). FWB is not the friendzone. I'm not quite sure why people can't make the distinction between being a friend of a woman and being in the friend-zone. I've genuinely befriended a handful of women. The circumstances surrounding the formation of said friendships were a far cry from the kinds of scenarios that are most typically associated with being friend-zoned. Link to post Share on other sites
regster Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 FWB where the female wants more but the man wont = female friendzone. FWB where both are fine with it = not a friendzone Most FWB's I have observed were the first Never did I ever state women dont like sex and dont get much out of it. That point is irrelevant. Of course they do- thats not the point at all. HoneyBadger Im really really sick of seeing your constant sexist posts. Link to post Share on other sites
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 I'm not quite sure why people can't make the distinction between being a friend of a woman and being in the friend-zone. I've genuinely befriended a handful of women. The circumstances surrounding the formation of said friendships were a far cry from the kinds of scenarios that are most typically associated with being friend-zoned. Same here. I have a few female friends that I'm fine with just being friends with. I wouldn't say I'm in the "friend zone" because I'm happy being their friends. As a previous poster noted though, I wouldn't want to date them because they're not hot enough. Before my gf, I did occasionally try to sleep with them....to no avail. Link to post Share on other sites
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 FWB where the female wants more but the man wont = female friendzone. FWB where both are fine with it = not a friendzone Most FWB's I have observed were the first Never did I ever state women dont like sex and dont get much out of it. That point is irrelevant. Of course they do- thats not the point at all. HoneyBadger Im really really sick of seeing your constant sexist posts. I know many women and many of them are perfectly content with just having sexual relationships and nothing more. This isn't 1955. For the most part, women view sex the same way that men do. Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 Hate to burst your bubble, but women like sex. They get just as much out of it as the men do (if not more). FWB is not the friendzone. I think the analogy was more to compare situations where one settles for something less in hopes that the other person will change her mind and want more. For men: settle for being friends in hopes of sex For women: settle for FWB in hopes of a relationship Link to post Share on other sites
USMCHokie Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 The idea of the friend zone is simple: NO ONE PUTS YOU IN THE FRIEND ZONE. YOU PUT YOURSELF IN THE FRIEND ZONE. If you are unsatisfied with the status of your relationship (whether platonic or romantic) with someone and you continue that relationship with them, then you have no one to blame but yourself for that dissatisfaction. No one forced you into the relationship, and you have no obligation to stay in it if you don't find value in it. You do not owe anyone to be their friend. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
fortyninethousand322 Posted May 8, 2013 Share Posted May 8, 2013 The idea of the friend zone is simple: NO ONE PUTS YOU IN THE FRIEND ZONE. YOU PUT YOURSELF IN THE FRIEND ZONE. If you are unsatisfied with the status of your relationship (whether platonic or romantic) with someone and you continue that relationship with them, then you have no one to blame but yourself for that dissatisfaction. No one forced you into the relationship, and you have no obligation to stay in it if you don't find value in it. You do not owe anyone to be their friend. I don't know. I think it's kind of like the "Nigerian Prince" scams. No one forces you to send them ten thousand dollars, but they shouldn't be asking (with an elaborate lie) for it in the first place. Double blame. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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