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My Girlfriend has turned me into a jealous man...


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I have a problem and it is that I'm becoming a very jealous boyfriend. I am currently in the 2nd year of a long distance relationship and there have been incidents in the past concerning my girlfriend and other guys. During the first couple of months my girlfriend slept with her ex (she says he gave her a guilt trip) after we were officially together and kissed a guy. Also she had an overbearing friend who wanted to be in a relationship with her. He would get drunk, act like a jerk and tell her how they should be together. He even disrespected me by calling her drunk on valentine's day (with some bogus excuse) when he knew I'd be there. Even though this made me livid she chose to still be his friend until he started acting too crazy. Now I personally believed that guys and girls trying to be close friends just makes things complicated (especially when you're young) and had told her how I felt but never told her to not have guy friends. After she cut her crazy friend loose she told me how she totally agreed with me and wasn't going to try and make guy friends anymore and I believed her until I found out that she had made another one, lied to me about him and spent a lot of time with him in somewhat intimate places such as her room and the park at night. I forgave her, because nobody's perfect, and we've discovered why she needed to do those things . I trust her but now I've just had so many negative experiences concerning her and guys that I've become jealous. She has this one friend at school that she hangs out with and its driving me crazy. He's one of her only friends still there for the summer and I would feel bad if I asked her not to hang out with him because it'd be cutting into her social life. I just don't know what to do. How can I get over all of this jealousy???

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You have every right to be jealous, you've forgiven her for a lot (and I don't see how someone could use the guilt trip to make another cheat on their bf/gf). I don't think I could stand for my boyfriend to hang around with lots of girls, and especially be really close friends with one. You should talk to your girlfriend about how committed she really is in this long distance relationship. I don't know of a way to get over jealous, except to fully trust the person you're with. But how can you trust someone who has cheated on you and lied to you? I'm not saying you should break up with her, I'm just saying you really need to talk to her about how feel, and maybe convince her that friends that are girls would be better for your relationship than friends that are guys.

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Ummm you can get over being jealous by being with someone who respects your feelings. It's obvious that she's young and she's having fun. She may love you dearly but you aren't around and with time comes opportunity. You say your girlfriend is turning you into a jealous person but sounds to me like you are kicking yourself for trusting her and possibily the lack of "control" over your relationship. Do yourself a favor and cut her loose - she'll either get her act together and show and prove she values your relationship and works towards earning your trust or she wont.

 

People can only do to us what we allow them to do! ;)

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