My fiance needs time to think

[MidwayMuscle]

Hello all! It is very sad to say that I'm on this website looking for answers as I thought something like this would never happen but here I am. Well to cut to the chase both my fiance and I are 20 years old and we have been engaged for 2 years now very happily with the occasional bumps along the road, but none the less we have both been blessed to be with another person who truly loves each other and cares about whatever is going on with each other. Today she had me stop by her house to drop off the money she was keeping at my house for her new car and the license plate that would be put on the vehicle(her mom kept taking money without asking and taking forever to pay it back which is why it is in my home). I felt something was up since she said she wanted to see me after work to talk about things, but she wouldn't say what that was even though I told her that her man's ears are wide open and that I'm always here to talk about anything even if that deals with myself because I'm not perfect and I can understand if she would ever have gripes. To shorten things up she gave me back our engagement ring stating that she just needed time to think, find herself, and time to herself. This all stems from one thing, myself being a dumbass! Prior to meeting her I was never quite the looker being a skinny white male who although was very kind and loving was the kinda guy who never got out of the friend zone and had no "game" as it were. This all started changing when I became very passionate with my weight training becoming much more consistent than every before arriveing at my current location being a 6'2" 200lbs, tanned, man of muscle who gets lots of looks even though I don't notice half the time because I'm still that kind loving skinny guy inside. This arose a problem because I never had attention from women all through growing up and all of a sudden girls seemed much more interested in myself along with crushes I've had through and after high school. Being a dumb idiot I talked to two of these girls on separate occasions being flirtuous and heading down a road which I told myself I would never be on, but I always stopped short of actually doing anything with the women. Needless to say my love found out and this has created quite the rift which caused her to return her ring today because it's constantly on her mind and shes been losing sleep because she doesn't know whether to trust what I say when I'm going somewhere and if I've been talking to other women. This really cuts deep due to the fact I've recently(past 2 months) have just been falling even more for her and knowing even more that she is the most beautiful, amazing, caring, loving woman I know and I couldn't be happier to be spending the rest of my life with her. I'm so distraught right now and don't really know what to think! I agreed to give her space and although I told her to keep the ring she said she didn't want it and I also agreed to take it during this time. I know she isn't the type of girl to be off with other men as she is the sweetest and truest girl I've ever met, but I'm just worried! She told me not to wait for her, but I want to shes the only one I want, she told me to get it out of my system but I only want to sit and wait for her to take time, and she told me she doesn't want to hold me back, but I only want to be with her and hold her! Thank you for any thoughts and I'm sorry for the long thread I don't know where to turn:/

[TigerCub]

Guys like you should worry her.

 

IMO, its the guys that don't get a chance to date much and get their freak on and then get married that pose a high risk, IMO at least.

 

I've been approached by some married men before and I tell them to f**k off, but the ones that I actually ask - "why are you even doing this" - its always the same bull*** answer "oh, I got married young and I never really got to be with anyone else, blah blah"

 

The same is for you "I never got noticed by girls, but now I'm good looking and they're coming my way" - you broke her trust and although you never slept or crossed a physical line with those other girls, you showed that you would play with fire and use the same "boo hoo I never had many girls before" sob story.

 

Besides, you guys are 20. She wants to find herself and grow and do things on her own. I actually would think that's a great idea even without your falling for temptation story.

 

Honestly, lots of people get married young and one day wake up and realize that they never did anything by themselves and they never got to know themselves and grow on their own.

 

Maybe this really is for the best.

 

Break up, let her find herself, you go and get your rocks off, and if you're meant to be in the end, you'll find each other.

 

Edit: I'm sure there are guys out there that haven't been with many women and can still stay faithful, but there are also a bunch of whiny ones that use that as an excuse.