cword Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 Well my situation is this, me and my daughters father broke up in February. We argued, I cried, we've been friends off and on, he has moved on with some other chic right after we broke up about 2 wks after. And just last week he got his own place and she moved in. Our little girl spent the weekend with him at his place last weekend yes of coarse around her too. I want my man back. I ruined the relationship by not giving him that security, being sexual with him often, and ignoring little things he would request. How do I get him back home with me and our little girl? Is this rebound relationship he's in real? Will it last? SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!! Me and my little girl wants him back. What should I do???? Link to post Share on other sites
danny8630 Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 Im sorry for your situation. What were his reasons for leaving? I would suggest you two sitting down and talking about reformations in the relationship. Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
Author cword Posted June 25, 2004 Author Share Posted June 25, 2004 Well he used to work like 8 to 12 hours a day and come home and have to deal with the kids and clean the house and do laundry because I had slacked in those areas. He said he was physically stressed. Plus I wasn't being intimate with him like I used to. We have sat down and talked and he saids his heart isn't here. If it is meant to be then it's meant to be is what he said. But I'm not trying to hear that. I want my family back together. Thanks for the luck. I pushed him away and now I'm reaping what I sow. Link to post Share on other sites
Varacha Posted June 25, 2004 Share Posted June 25, 2004 What it sounds like to me, is both of you got comfortable, and took that for granted. If you want to try and make things work with him, show him you can change, don't call and say but I've changed give me a chance, let him see you've changed what I mean is when he brings your daughter home or vice versa he'll see the difference. Maybe go out and do something you've always wanted to do, and meet new people it might help show him you've become the person he fell for in the first place again. Link to post Share on other sites
Author cword Posted June 25, 2004 Author Share Posted June 25, 2004 I think he wanted to come back because he has said to me how do I know if things aren't going to be the same? And other little things like as long as we are in the same state that feeling will never die. But how serious is he about this chic? When will he boot her out the way? I have done all of those things, even with my appearance because I used to wear nothing but jeans, sneakers, sweats, but now I dress more lady like and sexy. I really think I blew it. Link to post Share on other sites
Varacha Posted June 25, 2004 Share Posted June 25, 2004 It's good to hear, you're showing him in little ways. If he's saying these things, tell him that you are trying and he'll just have to trust you. As for the other woman, I can't say how long it will last or if it is even serious. Link to post Share on other sites
Author cword Posted June 25, 2004 Author Share Posted June 25, 2004 I have told him how I feel but he's just not hearing it. We were intimate 2 saturdays ago. So I feel that his relationship with her isn't serious to a certain extend. But also he just got his own place last Monday and she moved in with him. Is he just using her for security? Link to post Share on other sites
Varacha Posted June 25, 2004 Share Posted June 25, 2004 I see, it almost sounds like he could be using her for security, she could almost be a glorified room mate. Link to post Share on other sites
Author cword Posted June 25, 2004 Author Share Posted June 25, 2004 lol@the room mate statement. I wish that's all she was. I guess I'm just gonna keep our contact on the phone short and only about our daughter and just be patient and if it's meant to be then it will happen. I'm just impatient honestly. I want him back NOW lol Link to post Share on other sites
Varacha Posted June 25, 2004 Share Posted June 25, 2004 I know the roomie thing was a stretch made you laugh though so YAY me!!! Well I understand how you feel when you want it NOW!!, But remember if you love some one set them free if they come back to you they are yours forever. Link to post Share on other sites
Author cword Posted June 25, 2004 Author Share Posted June 25, 2004 I wish I could hug you for that final note, because that made me feel good. Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
Varacha Posted June 25, 2004 Share Posted June 25, 2004 Anytime. just let me know how things go Link to post Share on other sites
Author cword Posted June 25, 2004 Author Share Posted June 25, 2004 I promise I will Link to post Share on other sites
Blackfoot324 Posted June 25, 2004 Share Posted June 25, 2004 [color=blue][/color][font=courier new][/font] If he has moved on so quickly without you...what does that tell you other than she is a rebound? Things you need to know: 1-How long has she been in his life? The truth. 2-What makes you think she is just a rebound and not someone he has been messing around with while you were together? 3-If she is someone he just met, that is not good but you may have a chance. 4-If she is someone that has been there for some time, perhaps you should let go. You need to find out her true status. I mean what do you mean to him if he can just shack up with a new chick? It does not sound as if he gives a crap about you. Why would a man shack up with someone he just met and allow her to be around his child???? I believe that STRANGERS you/him are dating-screwing or whatever should be introduced to child or children. For many reasons we can dicuss later if you like. 5-Ask yourself, what is his true value to you and your child? And be real. If it money-Get child support or become self-sufficent. If it is true love, a good loving, nurtouring, monogamous relationship that that both of you want-Fight! If it is good sex-You can get that any where-Any Where! 6-You should find out how he truely feels about you and if he wants a go at it. If you do get back together, starting fresh with dates and so on, with some counseling will help. I could go on and on. Remember: Put the childs welfare first!! He may not be honest about the chick, so be nice and maybe you can get some scoop right from her mouth without asking much. Keep it general and play it like she is your girl-girl.But read her to see if she is lying. Link to post Share on other sites
Author cword Posted June 28, 2004 Author Share Posted June 28, 2004 Well they both claim that he and her became intimate after we seperated, but they were just talking on the phone a month before we broke up. See not putting his business out there but he knows her through his cousin. When I looked at the cell phone bill it shows that he had contact with this chic in January, but after we broke up the contact increased majorly. So I don't know her like that but I have met her before we seperated through his cousin. She said that she would never sleep someones man while they are together because she has too much class for that. But if she had class then why would she deal with him during a really MESSY break up, because it was really messy and I mean meeeesssyyyy. But I think he is searching for security and stability and I wasn't providing that so he found it in someone else, but not thinking that this is what you normally get at the beginning of a relationship then it could get boring after awhile. See for me, I truly love him, I want him here with me and the baby. But, I don't know how he REALLY feels, because his pride is so high that it's in defense mode so he's not gonna keep it real. Link to post Share on other sites
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