Mme. Chaucer Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 I can actually understand why women want chivalry but inspire that chivalrous instinct in men instead of demanding it and giving little to nothing in return. Okay. Now buy me that puppy and let me walk across your back as you lay face down in that mud puddle, or I'll kick your ass. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
musemaj11 Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 (edited) I feel sorry for you men who have never experienced dating a non-American woman. Its a totally different experience. You gotta try it at least once just for the sake of perspective. From my experience, non-American/non-Americanized women view love in a more emotional way. They are less concerned about stupid hollywood chivalry such as opening the door, pulling out chair, always paying, etc. Of course all women in this world appreciate gentlemanly behaviors. But non-American women aren't rigid about it. Its not a 'do it or begone' thing for them. Its hard to explain but the easiest way to put it is that they are a lot less 'princessy'. I guess though part of the reason for that is also that non-American men are less chumpy. I can see that the men here view and treat women in a different way as well. Many of them refuse to bend over backwards for women like many American men do. Edited July 10, 2012 by musemaj11 Link to post Share on other sites
ZhaoZilong5 Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 ITT: Women who either want men to pay for everything or put in more than than the woman does. I see why this forum exists. Who the hell in his right mind would want to put in more effort and get the same return as somebody who puts in less effort? And there's all of this talk about chivalry? Please. Make up your mind on whether or not you want women to be treated as equally as men. You can't have your cake and eat it too. Well, I guess you can with guys who have no self-respect. All I see are selfish women that remind me of gold diggers. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Feelsgoodman Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 I feel sorry for you men who have never experienced dating a non-American woman. Its a totally different experience. You gotta try it at least once just for the sake of perspective. +1000. The only caveat is that she must not have lived in NA long enough to get polluted by the cancerous local "culture". Link to post Share on other sites
zengirl Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 I hope I'm not jumping into a fire by asking this... ...but I'm dating someone new and have been wondering about this topic a bit. He has paid for everything we've done while out together. He hasn't even let me pay for small things like an iced coffee yet. I offered on the 2nd and 3rd dates to pay. The first time he just waved it away. The second time I told him I don't expect him to pay for all our dates and offered to pay, and he just smiled, said, "Don't worry about that," and paid. We're continuing to date, and I'm wondering if I should keep offering, just grab the bill and insist at some point, or just let him pay? Eventually, I'd grab the bill sometime OR just buy tickets for something etc. I know plenty of men who prefer to pay most or even all of the time, but they do like it when a woman goes out and gets something sometimes, as long as they don't have to actually 'agree'. I can't really imagine it being a negative if you did so, unless the guy is a major control freak. But if he enjoys paying and often insists, I wouldn't start grabbing EVERY bill or anything. I can actually understand why women want chivalry but inspire that chivalrous instinct in men instead of demanding it and giving little to nothing in return. I think that there are many women that do just that -- not even intentionally. Most men I know who pay for dinner do so when they truly want to. I'm sure you've paid for some dinners for that same reason, right, Woggle? Like with your wife on some dates? It was because she inspired you to chivalry (probably without even trying to and just by being a genuine person), not because she's some entitled, petulant woman, I'm guessing. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Ruby Slippers Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 Eventually, I'd grab the bill sometime OR just buy tickets for something etc. I know plenty of men who prefer to pay most or even all of the time, but they do like it when a woman goes out and gets something sometimes, as long as they don't have to actually 'agree'. I can't really imagine it being a negative if you did so, unless the guy is a major control freak. But if he enjoys paying and often insists, I wouldn't start grabbing EVERY bill or anything. OK, thanks. Next time, I'm just going to grab the bill and tell him I want to get it this time. He is somewhat a control freak, quite dominant (in a good way), traditional, and old-school. Mostly I like these qualities. I can't see him agreeing to let me pay. So I will just surprise him with it. I will only give in if he insists or wrestles the bill out of my hands - which I would not put past him 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 i never pay more than 10 dollars tops on a date until we're in deep. if she doesn't like it. tough luck. if more guys would do that then there would be less crying about it. By doing so you weed out the women who are in it for money only. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Disenchantedly Yours Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 If money for your meals is such a big deal, I suggest some of you women get a better job. There's no logical reason why someone else should be responsible for your food. Put your big girl panties on and grow up. My "big girl panties" are at the drycleaners. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
musemaj11 Posted July 12, 2012 Share Posted July 12, 2012 (edited) if more guys would do that then there would be less crying about it. By doing so you weed out the women who are in it for money only. It seems to me 'societal rules' are about 'collective bargaining'. For example in a society where the majority of the women have no problem having sex early, women who want to wait for sex will have a hard time. And in a society where the majority of the men insist on paying and doing everything, men who want to have an equal relationship will have a hard time. The key is to move to a society that fits your viewpoint best. But unfortunately its easier said than done. +1000. The only caveat is that she must not have lived in NA long enough to get polluted by the cancerous local "culture". People adapt. Its normal. Thats why you should go directly to the source. Of course its not that easy. Some people like me are lucky enough to have connections in another country which enable me to move abroad. Edited July 12, 2012 by musemaj11 Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted July 13, 2012 Share Posted July 13, 2012 If eating is that serious, then: hoes, get a better job. No, men are not a job. Go join an escort service. @guys who pay women for their time: grow a pair. and if dishing out a little cash for food and drinks is that serious then use that money to buy a prostitute instead. That is guaranteed sex with no meal. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
WonderKid Posted July 13, 2012 Share Posted July 13, 2012 If I asked her out then I'd pay but I'm not going all out. If she say I'm cheap then oh well go to the country club and get one of those guys. Or go dutch. I've been on dates with women who talk about chivalry but wouldn't know nothing of it even if it was tatted on them. I thought most women thought chivalry was too 'mushy' for them. They want the aggressive approach. Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted July 13, 2012 Share Posted July 13, 2012 If I asked her out then I'd pay but I'm not going all out. If she say I'm cheap then oh well go to the country club and get one of those guys. Or go dutch. I don't get why so many people are complaining on here about this. This approach here makes sense. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
filani Posted July 13, 2012 Share Posted July 13, 2012 This is my take on the topic. I have no issues with being a 'gentleman' but I only extend that courtesy to a 'Lady' . No guys am not talking about Lady in terms of gender or title but in behavior, character and disposition towards men in general. Feminazi need not apply . I do not invest myself heavily money wise if I am not convinced she will do the same for me. Coffee dates are a norm for me until I'm convinced she's really into me. If I decide to go for an 'official' date at a modest diner I'm ok with paying for date 1 but I expect her to have her purse ready by date 2 to at least pay her share, even if I eventually decline her offer she scores major points for showing she's not using me for a free meal but the girls who wins me over is the one who calls me to set up date 3 and pays for it . Link to post Share on other sites
musemaj11 Posted July 13, 2012 Share Posted July 13, 2012 and if dishing out a little cash for food and drinks is that serious then use that money to buy a prostitute instead. That is guaranteed sex with no meal. Usually though a girlfriend in the long run is cheaper than a prostitute. The initial fee can be steep. But once you are a 'member', you get more for the price you pay. This is why if Im only interested in sex in a woman, I dont mind paying. Im averse to being expected to pay only if Im truly into the girl. It makes me feel that that the appreciation is one-sided and it worries me investing emotion in her. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted July 13, 2012 Share Posted July 13, 2012 I find it amusing how Pyro keeps putting out logical suggestions but people just keep arguing around him. ...On second thoughts, no, I think I would be more surprised if they didn't... 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 This is why if Im only interested in sex in a woman, I dont mind paying. Then why are you here debating this topic if you don't mind paying every time? Serious question. I find it amusing how Pyro keeps putting out logical suggestions but people just keep arguing around him. ...On second thoughts, no, I think I would be more surprised if they didn't... If they are aren't arguing (staying busy on the PC) then their mom makes them sweep the basement. I've noticed everytime you post, it's profemale. Any female brown nosing comment always gets "liked" by insecure females who want to control male sexuality by having them pay for their orgasms. You and BrahmaBull are the finest whiteknights I've ever seen, because: God forbid someone tells these money hungry females who can't even afford their own meals to get a damn job. and everyone of your posts are anti-female. Makes me wonder why you are on a relationship forum when it is clear that you are against them and/or unable to get one. I like how it's only logical when it's favorable towards females. And I like how females always turn each other on with the profemale posts, spamming the like button whenever they say something that makes life easier for women. If you want a meal, get a (better) job, instead of looking for a guy to bum food from. and if you are going to bitch about dating then never do it. Stay indoors and let rational people date. "Ladies", if you're too broke to afford yourself, then don't date. Stop trying to rationalize why your lack of money is our responsibility. and if you are going to be cheap about it then don't date or keep the date simple OR be up front and let her know that you only go dutch. That's actually not true. First she's the girlfriend, ok some dates and maybe a gift on valentines and her birthday. Usually she'll put out quite frequently so it might be cheaper than a prostitute. Since you said long term it'll eventually involve moving in, where you'll most likely pay the majority of the bills. Depending on the girl she might start putting out less because of "routine". If not she still might be cheaper than a quality working girl. And then you get married, by your 25th mortgage payment a top tier prostitute would've been cheaper for the 6 times you've had sex since you got married. Thank you for not trying to get into any meaningful relationships. You are doing many people a huge favor. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
WonderKid Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 and everyone of your posts are anti-female. Makes me wonder why you are on a relationship forum when it is clear that you are against them and/or unable to get one. ^^^ Whoa!! Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 Everytime you post, you're bashing someone for not putting a female on the pedestal and buying her time. Just because you're a pussy, who can't get a girl without buying them, doesn't mean everyone else has to be desperate. You're an undercover male misandrist. Every time you type, you're going after a guy who's not white knighting...and you have 25,000 posts. Get a life....or buy some girl to hang out with you. I'm just curious how many other accounts you have had here before. If you learned how to read you would see that I have told these men who are crying about money that in order to weed out the women who are out for your money/free meal to just keep the date simple (a coffee place where you spend less than 10 dollars) or tell the woman up front that you only go dutch. If the woman is not up for that then you know that you dodged a bullet. If you can't do either of those options then don't date at all. Where is the pedestal? Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 Why is it "men that are crying about money", when the women are the ones who can't even afford themselves? That's how I know you're a pusswhipped whiteknight, who sucks with women. Stop trying to force your whiteknight views on everyone. You really do need a life. Re-read this thread and you will see. Weshallovercome? I bet that is you. Funny that this account opened up not long after your other name was suspended.....and I need a life? You're 23 and never had a relationship. Talk to me and attempt your insults when you get some experience. Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 This is further proof that you're one delusional white knight. You site around and stock members, force your pussy-begging white knight views on everyone who isn't desperate enough to buy women out, have 25,000 posts on a single forum, and making absurd accusations about random people who disagree with you. And if that guy really is 23 and never had a relationship, then.... Well, if he always wanted one, and failed to acquire by that age, then I guess there's a problem. But, if he doesn't have one and doesn't care to have one, that's his business. At the end of the day, you're still a hyper-aggressive pussy beggar. And I don't only make anti-women posts. Ask BrahmaBull, I diss white knights and beta males like you all the time. Take your 25k posts, and get a damn life instead of trying to force your views on everyone else. of course you will not admit to having multiple accounts on here. That is quite the life you live. If you were never banned then you would have double the amount of posts that I have. Such a warped view you have thinking that I am begging for pussy when I tell guys to weed out the gold diggers, but 23 year old's have a lot to learn. Link to post Share on other sites
miss_jaclynrae Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 I think this is a stupid argument. Men, don't want to pay? Don't pay. Women, always make sure you have the money to pay for yourself in case he doesn't. Men, get upset if she pitches a fit about you not paying? Don't take her out again. Women, pitch a fit because he didn't pay? Don't date him again! It really IS that simple. No one situation is right or wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
Pyro Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 You can call me whoever you want, if it helps you cope with the fact that people have different views than you. But the only facts here are that: 1) If you can't afford yourself, you shouldn't date 2) You have 25,000 posts and all you do is patrol the board attacking men who think buying someone out is ridiculous 3) You're a desperate white knight being overly aggressive to compensate that you're a physically weak, whimp in real life. 4) Get a life and stop trying to police others' views. We know how you feel, move the hell on. Believe it or not I agree with #1. That goes for men and women. That is the good thing about the internet, you can be a tough guy on it. You tell me to get a life? Here you are posting here on a Friday night. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
miss_jaclynrae Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 Guys, honestly, there are women out there that don't care about paying for themselves, I always offer to get myself. If he insists then great, that is a plus to me and it is something I really appreciate. If he doesn't but it was still a great date, I don't mind at all. I firmly believe a woman should ALWAYS still offer to pay for herself, it is just common courtesy. & Ladies, there are indeed men out there who would LOVE to pay and wine and dine you. So if that is something you are looking for then you won't have a problem either. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 2) You have 25,000 posts Oh.. it's you.. the guy who calls people out for their post count and thinks that is a great side to the debate How many ID's have you had here ? hahahahahaha Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 and you have 25,000 posts. hahahahaha... great debate... Link to post Share on other sites
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