Is dating for women 100% easier? Are men expendable to women?

[Caius Ballad]

Guys have to be taller. If you're 5'5...well don't even bother looking at women.

Guys have to have status

Guys are trapped to a gender role

Guys have to show alpha male traits

 

 

Women just have to be healthy looking (As in not being fat). As a female soon as you walk outside you'll have 10 guys ready to date you. As a man I have to work hard as hell just for one girl to look at me.

 

Women can get the numbers of 40 men out of 120 guys

Men if lucky can get 5 numbers out of 200 women.

 

In the end of the day as a man I question my existence as a man. Is life really worth it if women and society only need you for utilitarian purposes? As a male I'm freaking tired of this disposable feeling I get when I'm around females in general. I've seen it so many times when a guy is sick of his gender role in the world of dating ALL women discard his existence while other men punish him for it.

[Emilia]

Have you ever been on a single date yet? Have you ever had a girlfriend?

[bac]

Guys have to be taller. If you're 5'5...well don't even bother looking at women.

Guys have to have status

Guys are trapped to a gender role

Guys have to show alpha male traits

 

 

Women just have to be healthy looking (As in not being fat). As a female soon as you walk outside you'll have 10 guys ready to date you. As a man I have to work hard as hell just for one girl to look at me.

 

Women can get the numbers of 40 men out of 120 guys

Men if lucky can get 5 numbers out of 200 women.

 

In the end of the day as a man I question my existence as a man. Is life really worth it if women and society only need you for utilitarian purposes? As a male I'm freaking tired of this disposable feeling I get when I'm around females in general. I've seen it so many times when a guy is sick of his gender role in the world of dating ALL women discard his existence while other men punish him for it.

 

IMO dating for males is 100% easier because a man has the right to choose first. You can be yourself if you date inside your league. Women have much more problems than men do in terms of dating. You just do not know anything about the problems. If you knew what it takes for a woman to be slim and fit, .............

Perhaps, life is really worth it even men often need women just to use them for sex or something else. Women often feel disposable as sex objects.

Of course you can change your gender, if you want to take your chance waiting for men to choose you as a disposable sex object.

[truth_seeker]

Both sexes have advantages. I think women have the advantage early on in life, 18-29 age range. Once they go past 30, they deal with the pressure of getting married, starting a family. Men have the advantage post age 30. At this point you can weed out the Men and the Boys. Who has a career, money, status, men can choose who they want to court, not grab whatever they can get.

[MrCastle]

It's definitely much harder for men early on.

 

But remember though, society puts more pressure on women to be beautiful.

 

Once their looks start to decline it's much harder for them to find a good man.

 

At least a decent looking guy can get by if he has a great personality.

 

A girl who is not very attractive will have a harder time finding someone.

 

I would tweak your statement a little and say HOT women have it easier than men. But hot women have it easier than everybody.

[Kamille]

I think you're misinterpreting what happens on OLD sites and thinking this is true of all areas of life. Yes, it is true that men are put at a disadvantage on those sites. I can understand how OLD sites could make a man feel at a disadvantage and expendable.

 

But guess what? OLD sites do not represent all of reality. Men stand a much better chance of getting noticed in real life, through their social networks, by getting active in activities which bring men and women together. Don't let what happens on-line determine how you feel about yourself.

[d'Arthez]

Guys are not trapped in the "male" gender role. Most guys let themselves get trapped into it. The same applies for women.

[truth_seeker]

But guess what? OLD sites do not represent all of reality. Men stand a much better chance of getting noticed in real life, through their social networks, by getting active in activities which bring men and women together. Don't let what happens on-line determine how you feel about yourself.

 

This is very true. I can tell you I've met women from OLD sites where they did not look the person in their photos. With the advent of photoshop, people posting dated photos, and others who are simply photogenic, you're better off meeting people face-to-face first than falling in love over what they write in their profile and how they look in pictures.

[d'Arthez]

This is very true. I can tell you I've met women from OLD sites where they did not look the person in their photos. With the advent of photoshop, people posting dated photos, and others who are simply photogenic, you're better off meeting people face-to-face first than falling in love over what they write in their profile and how they look in pictures.

Men, if they are actually looking for a long term partner, rather than a quick lay should not invest much in the pictures. Judge women by their profiles (though even that can be tricky. How many people ask friends to help writing a profile?).

[RiverRunning]

Dating isn't easy for either party. Looking at it through a filter - seeing only the difficulties YOU have faced and figuring these difficulties are common with all men, and that it's SO EASY to be a woman - is simply ludicrous.

 

Not being fat if you're a woman helps (as someone who's continually losing weight, I can say almost for certain - and I'm tall - that you're basically invisible once you get to be obese. And being 30 pounds overweight isn't all that heavy, my friends).

 

Sure, I've had lots of opportunities to date when I go on dating sites. You wanna know what kinds of winners I see? For some perspective, I'd say I'm moderately attractive (even if I am overweight). I'm college-educated, friendly, outgoing, helpful, polite and I have a lot of varied interests (dancing at a club one night, enjoying a quiet afternoon at a museum or at home the next!). I work and make an OK living. I'm great with kids and pets.

 

Almost every man who messages me - regardless of his looks - has kids and an awkward situation with his ex (living with her, they're at war over the kids, some other screwed up thing) or he's got obvious misogynistic views toward women (fwiw, I think referring to any human woman as 'female' or 'females' is clinical and it comes off as misogynistic. 'The male shakes his tail feathers. The female, seeing his courtship display, responds.' Take it to National Geographic).

 

Most type like they didn't go to school beyond the second or third grade. Their approach is incredibly impersonal, their profiles mostly bare. Most of the guys I talk to on those sites want to get down to sex immediately - wanting to know about my past, discussing their past unprompted, wanting to know if I want to 'hook up' after the first date, etc. Not only are they jerks, they're socially retarded too.

 

Many are completely uneducated and don't even have jobs. I don't have a problem with a guy who's working a minimum wage job - but I would certainly hope he's taking SOME step to improve himself. Is he in school or in training, or is he ok earning $7.50 for the rest of his life? If I want a long-term relationship with this person, a guy who's okay making $7.50 for life just isn't going to cut it. I would need someone to help pay the bills and help raise our kids...so I alone can't be the breadwinner.

 

If he's taken steps to improve himself but he just can't get out of a dead-end job, that's different. But if he's just shrugging his shoulders and he's okay siphoning off of me, it's not happening.

 

So, sure, OP. It's very easy dating online if you're a woman! If you want a misogynistic deadbeat who's hung up on his ex, barely works (if he works at all), can't pay any of his bills and wants to screw you as soon as you're available. That's the kind of guy I want to call me.

 

For what it's worth, there are lots of difficulties in dating from a woman's perspective. Most people still follow the social code that men ask first and women wait to be asked. To be asked out, to be asked to get married, etc. That is INCREDIBLY frustrating and it's not all that surprising when women wind up getting seriously depressed because that 'code' makes it so difficult to be the first one to take the step.

 

In my experiences, I've found that whenever I have to ask a guy out first, it's just because he's not all that into me. Most probably would say 'yes' if I asked them out (opportunity is opportunity). Then two years later I'm wondering why we still almost never have sex and he looks like he'd rather throw up than kiss me. Never again will I be the first to ask a guy out or ask him to marry me. Never.

[threebyfate]

Yes, all women have a parade of suitors banging down their doors. Get over it.

[PhillyDude]

This little fact below confirms dating is easier for women

 

"There are mutiple dating sites geared toward plus size woman"

 

 

When was the last time you seen a dating site geared toward FAT MEN?

 

 

 

The End

[TheSingleGuy]

Men, generally, are WAY more over weight than women.

[DjinnAgain]

Is it easier? Yes.

 

That doesn't mean we consider men in such a dismissive view.

[PhillyDude]

Men, generally, are WAY more over weight than women.

 

What the hell does that mean? Have you seen some of the FAT NASTY women on this big and beautiful dating sites?

[Imajerk17]

Men' date=' if they are actually looking for a long term partner, rather than a quick lay should not invest much in the pictures. Judge women by their profiles (though even that can be tricky. How many people ask friends to help writing a profile?).[/quote']

 

I agree.

 

I like your posts man, but dude, that is one creepy avatar!

[somedude81]

Of course dating is 100% easier for women. There is just no comparison between how difficult it is for men. Women don't have to do 1/4 the things that men do to get a relationship.

Have you ever been on a single date yet? Have you ever had a girlfriend?

You do know that question only proves his point.

[d'Arthez]

I like your posts man, but dude, that is one creepy avatar!

If you know what this avatar actually is, you'd see the irony of me posting in this thread.

[Imajerk17]

If you know what this avatar actually is' date=' you'd see the irony of me posting in this thread. [/quote']

 

 

Looks like a rubber ducky dressed as a dominatrix.....

[truth_seeker]

Men' date=' if they are actually looking for a long term partner, rather than a quick lay should not invest much in the pictures. Judge women by their profiles (though even that can be tricky. How many people ask friends to help writing a profile?).[/quote']

 

Tricky you are right. Be careful with the ones who say they don't take life too seriously. That's a red flag for flake.

[matte123]

It varies. I'm a woman and I get approach once in a blue moon.

 

I agree.

 

I like your posts man, but dude, that is one creepy avatar!

 

His avatar is so adorable. I don't see the creepy in it lol

[carhill]

Dating is hard in some form or fashion for nearly everyone, even for people one might think have it easy. It's just 'hard' in different ways.

 

There's no doubt I've felt 'expendable' over the decades but you know what? I put myself in those circumstances voluntarily. Owned. I make different choices now and life is 1000% better.

[Monm82]

Average men don't have a bunch of a options. Average women do.

 

It may be hard for a woman to find the right guy, but at least they a lot of men to choose from. Most average guys have a hard time finding any woman interested in him, period.

Edited May 20, 2012 by Monm82

[grkBoy]

For all the guys who think women have it so easy in dating...

 

...imagine if you find that most women you try to date only want you to spend money on them and will never have sex with you, kiss you, commit to you, or even respect you.

 

Imagine if you're stuck between choosing a woman you don't find physically attractive, but she'll commit to you and love you...versus any "hot" looking woman who will only use/abuse you.

 

 

This is what women go through. Think about how many women meet men, go on dates, she wants a relationship, but finds out he wants to remain single and only "have fun". He'll easily have sex with her, but won't marry her or commit even.

 

Of course we've all seen women complain how all the hot guys are jerks, the nice guys are ugly, and the hot/nice guys are gay.

 

 

This is why I'll never think women have the advantage...but in some sick way we're all on an even playing field. If you don't believe me, look at how many women out there feel they "worked hard" to be successful and physically appealing...but find out their only choices are sex with the hot/successful guys, or commitment to an ugly loser they don't find attractive.

 

Now think about how we men worry about fat women, women who want a meal ticket, airheads, single moms with loads of drama, etc.

 

The grass seems evenly green on either side of the fence.

[truth_seeker]

For all the guys who think women have it so easy in dating...

 

...imagine if you find that most women you try to date only want you to spend money on them and will never have sex with you, kiss you, commit to you, or even respect you.

 

Imagine if you're stuck between choosing a woman you don't find physically attractive, but she'll commit to you and love you...versus any "hot" looking woman who will only use/abuse you.

 

 

This is what women go through. Think about how many women meet men, go on dates, she wants a relationship, but finds out he wants to remain single and only "have fun". He'll easily have sex with her, but won't marry her or commit even.

 

Of course we've all seen women complain how all the hot guys are jerks, the nice guys are ugly, and the hot/nice guys are gay.

 

 

This is why I'll never think women have the advantage...but in some sick way we're all on an even playing field. If you don't believe me, look at how many women out there feel they "worked hard" to be successful and physically appealing...but find out their only choices are sex with the hot/successful guys, or commitment to an ugly loser they don't find attractive.

 

Now think about how we men worry about fat women, women who want a meal ticket, airheads, single moms with loads of drama, etc.

 

The grass seems evenly green on either side of the fence.

 

My problem has been women assume I'm a jerk and a player because of the way I dress and look, so they play games with me to test me, which frustrates me because I am a nice guy. By the time they realize I'm a nice guy, I'm usually gone and I hear from them. I'm so jaded by their behavior I don't give them a second chance.

 

I think girls with options love to abuse them. Have their cake and eat it, too. Fool around with all the hot guys they can while young and beautiful, but when their looks start to slip, and that biological clock is ticking, it's time to settle for a "safe guy", ie, financial and emotional secure. Less emphasis on looks, more on security.