todreaminblue Posted August 3, 2012 Share Posted August 3, 2012 Hi ed, just wanted to touch base and see how you are havent seen you post in while.Feel a little insecure,and invasive on you, so I will just ask if it is ok don't feel obligated to post to me... just wanted to post to a poster I have posted to since the beginning.Hope that you are well and happy and coping the best that you can would love to hear from you..if not i send my hope to you for a great day full of laughter and smiles where ever you are ..deb xx Link to post Share on other sites
Author Edtheduck Posted August 4, 2012 Author Share Posted August 4, 2012 Hi Debs Thanks for thinking of me. It's very kind of you and I appreciate it. Well, to be honest, not great. After LC with my ex the last few weeks, I maybe started to think it was getting better. The last week though she doesn't really talk to me, she's unwell too so I'm a bit concerned. When I ring she ignores it, and has started to ignore my texts. I thought I was in a better place, but maybe I pushed her too much recently. I did, and still do fear there may be someone else now. I still love her, very much so. This weekend is exactly one year since I first met her. Memories are clear. Next week is 4 months since the BU. I'm beginning to think she may never come back, and it does hurt. Each day at a time I guess. Still don't want to date, and no one would come close right now to be honest. Tough sometimes. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted August 5, 2012 Share Posted August 5, 2012 Hi Debs Thanks for thinking of me. It's very kind of you and I appreciate it. Well, to be honest, not great. After LC with my ex the last few weeks, I maybe started to think it was getting better. The last week though she doesn't really talk to me, she's unwell too so I'm a bit concerned. When I ring she ignores it, and has started to ignore my texts. I thought I was in a better place, but maybe I pushed her too much recently. I did, and still do fear there may be someone else now. I still love her, very much so. This weekend is exactly one year since I first met her. Memories are clear. Next week is 4 months since the BU. I'm beginning to think she may never come back, and it does hurt. Each day at a time I guess. Still don't want to date, and no one would come close right now to be honest. Tough sometimes. I am sorry that you have a rough time ed,I am hoping that it gets better for you soon,MY birthday was at the beginning of the month its a full two months of brithdays' for me and then it is over, so my birthday party chucking days are over for the year.If I ever see another mud cake...........I wish you happiness on your birthday ed.....Hope that its blue skies for you soon you deserve that.....deb Link to post Share on other sites
Author Edtheduck Posted August 6, 2012 Author Share Posted August 6, 2012 Thanks Deb. The birthday has been and gone now, so time to carry on, get my head down and take things day by day. I don't want to date, I'm still very much in love with this lady, and her kids. Just don't know what to do with it all. I thought by now I would be feeling better about it all, but I'm not. The LC had I guess got me thinking maybe she will start opening up to me again. Maybe I pushed it a little too much, as it's clear she's gone back into her shell. I'm stuck with it all. Do women with kids, looking for an ideal partner push the good ones away so often?! I know most men would use her and tell her to jump, as she's so attractive yet gullible. God the frustration of it all. Just don't know what to do anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 Thanks Deb. The birthday has been and gone now, so time to carry on, get my head down and take things day by day. I don't want to date, I'm still very much in love with this lady, and her kids. Just don't know what to do with it all. I thought by now I would be feeling better about it all, but I'm not. The LC had I guess got me thinking maybe she will start opening up to me again. Maybe I pushed it a little too much, as it's clear she's gone back into her shell. I'm stuck with it all. Do women with kids, looking for an ideal partner push the good ones away so often?! I know most men would use her and tell her to jump, as she's so attractive yet gullible. God the frustration of it all. Just don't know what to do anymore. I have in the past pushed good guys away, maybe because I didn't feel good enough for them,and there are reasons for that. I have had opportunities to be with men that have loved me and I have not ,I have run and normally interstate.You cant turn back the hands of time and change the present, knowing what I know now, is I did deserve to be loved as much as I can love.I know that you should hang in, I am saying this because, I think this woman would be lucky to have you and I do hope you don't give up.Her children would be as lucky as she would be, to have a man like you as a role model and partner.But a good man is still a man and shouldn't have to wait forever,just hope she does see dawn one day and your face is the first thing she thinks about.Good luck ed....best wishes to you from this aussie.....deb Link to post Share on other sites
Author Edtheduck Posted August 6, 2012 Author Share Posted August 6, 2012 Thank you Debs Your words enough encourage me to hang in there, for better or worse. People think I'm nuts for wanting to be with someone who has 3 kids, but it doesn't bother me in the slightest. I take it all as a package. I don't know what I'm supposed to do now, but I've gone back into NC as the lack of responses to my asking if she was ok last week just frustrated me. She's a stubborn sole, I may reach out again in a week or two. Not sure yet. You can pm me to keep updated if you like, as I doubt I'll be updating this thread. It just upsets me to think about it all and what chance there may have been, gone. 4 months next week, it's certainly not how I expected to feel this far on. What is it they say, unconditional love? It definitely feels that way, and I'm helpless to it. This isnt no teenage crush or bull****, adult relationship and hard to decipher. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 I am sorry to hear Ed that it is getting you down.I really hope that you get the girl, more than anyone else I have posted on here, you strike me as so genuine and honest and nice,hey you put up with my random posts and worried wart attitude... I can see you.YOU are the only one on here who I feel comfortable posting too and not anxious with I dont know why it is that way its your calmness its soothing to me.I wont stalk you ,don't worry I want to hear you got the girl I keep hoping that for you.I don't like pming but I will because I am not scared of you,instinct is feeling serene.....if that is ok, with you of course.If i have been to open than I am sorry if it made you uncomfortable.I want to know that you are ok, and going well and the girl well, she better move quickly.What a miss for her.....I will vibe her for you.....smilin atcha....all blue skies for ed.....deb Link to post Share on other sites
Author Edtheduck Posted August 7, 2012 Author Share Posted August 7, 2012 Hey Debs, You're very sweet saying them things. I'm just me, normal guy, live on my own but very close to my family. Want the good things in life like happiness and a family. I thought she would have been the one to give me all of that and more. It couldn't be further away at the moment. Of course it's ok to PM, I rarely check on here but when I do I'll keep out for your messages. I'm just taking it day by day. Motivation is low, had a new job offer too but am going to turn it down as my head isn't in the right place for it at the moment. It would only lead to me not showing my best. Completely and utterly frustrated by it all. I would give it all to her, if only she could see it. Here's to another day of thoughts Link to post Share on other sites
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