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Am I being oversensitive?


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Today of all days, I feel lost and confused. My bf of 7 months and I have been arguing,or having intense conversations for days, and I cant stop being angry, or stop reading things into all his comments.

 

I have been seeing a very special man for around 7 monts, we knew eachother for several years, and when we both became available started dating, he is 25, I 30. He is single never having been married, I am divorced. We both love animals, have lots in commen and have talked about marrige. I am the mother of a great kiddo, he has only known my child for about the last 4 months. Recently some things have come up that have made rifts in our normally smooth relationship.

 

 

1. He feels the need to protect his assets, mostly his animals and money telling me that my opinion does not matter, and that they are his, so he will do what he wants with them (sold my favorite animal he knew I wanted him to keep.) Says we arent married so he doesnt have to justify why he wont keep things if I like them.

 

2. Informed me that my child will not be ours, it will be mine, and its not his place to assist in the emotional nurtering of the child. He says he wants to be a family, but doesnt want to be a help in raising her. Says all decesions reguarding her are mine alone.

 

3. Admits that being a shrewd businessman is more important than respecting my feelings. If money is at hand, even if it hurts me, what he wants is more important.

 

4. Prefers to sleep with the dog,(I have the dog at my home while he works nights.) We have 4 days a month when he can sleep here, and he would rather sleep with the dog.

 

5. Told me tonight he was coming over, then called to say he wasnt, and when I told him I knew he wasnt, told me I was rude.

 

These all all vauge I know, but he says he loves me, and I do think I love him,what do I do>break it off, or try to be less sensitive? Am I overreacting?

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cinnamonstix49

You are NOT being overly sensitive... it sounds to me like you have found yourself a genuine jerk... have you tried talking all of this over with him? I'm not sure I would jump into marriage with this guy until some of his issues were resolved.

 

Best wishes.

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The fact that he sold your favorite animal...I could tolerate that, just barely. But that fact that he doesn't want any part in raising your child :o that is just terrible. I don't know about you, but if I was looking for a husband, it would be one that wouldn't just be a husband to me, but a father to my child. If he can't accept your kid, then he is not accepting the biggest part of your life. He doesn't seem like he cares about anyone but himself. If I were you I would seriously think over having him in my life or not, and talk to him about how you feel. Good luck.

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The situation hasnt really improved, but I am feeling less lost, more able to see what is happening, and alot less angry. The favorite animal, my mother bought it, and that is ok. The discussion over things he feels strongly about, they made me realize that maybe I was blinded, and need to really rethink marrying someone with such core differences. Being his girlfriend or future wife, not nearly as important as me having the things that make me happy...Thanks for the great input, he says he loves me, and if he does, hell show me by meeting me half way...Right????

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