ThaWholigan Posted May 22, 2012 Share Posted May 22, 2012 This is a long post, long time in the making too..... Ever since I was about.....5 maybe, people have been foisting their expectations on me. It was clear that despite any difficulties that I had, I was born with a certain skillset that allowed me to learn things very quickly. Ever since then, it appears that my entire progression had been mapped out by those around me. This has continued throughout my life up till quite recently. My mother, bless her she does her best, has always had a strong influence in my life and thankfully encouraged me to discover myself and independence - even though she worries about me alot. But even she had tried to steer me into a direction that she wished me to go. One of my close friends set up a label together which is still running and doing OK, but I have felt itchy and wanted to go my own path, which is difficult because my friend seems to have attached our alliance to the label, which I'm not sure I want to be as big a part of anymore. He built the entire thing around me and my abilities. While I'm flattered, I don't know if I'm comfortable anymore being the focal point of a project that may or may not be going in a direction that I want it to personally. Combine that with the drastic loss of confidence I suffered just before the turn of 2009, resulting in procrastination, laziness and even mild depression, and I felt that I was in a crisis. That I had no control over my life and where I wanted to go. Procrastination felt like an escape, as in a subconscious way, I was spiting all the people in my life who seemed to be steering me in directions that they wanted me to go. I started to smoke a lot more weed, I produced less beats, I performed much less, and the autism diagnosis was about the only thing close to liberating at the time as it gave me a modicum of clarity. Fast forward to now, and not a massive deal has changed really except that I am changing. I now have greater insight into myself and why I have been having the problems I have been having with regards to progression. I'm preparing for a massive change in the way I do things. I need to cut out my procrastination. I need to be fitter. I need to start trusting my intuition more. I need to allow myself to be more charismatic more often. I also need to start honing my abilities again, as I have gotten lazy and basked in my previous work rather than building on it. So my action plan for what I want to do in the near future is this: 1) Remaster all my instruments and get to a master level at them. Piano, Guitar and Bass. To add to that, refresh my rap styles and start singing. Everyone's been badgering me about singing saying I should do it, so I downloaded some singing programs and I'm going to try and hone that ability too. That would make me more rounded. I want to experiment with rapping and playing piano at the same time. I don't just want to be good at it though, I want to be a master. I want to be able to deliver some tongue twisting, multi syllabic rhymes while playing 7th arpeggios and jazz chords at the same time. That would be something new. 2) Become an athlete/study fitness. I don't just want to be fit. I want to be an athlete. I want to be fast, strong, agile, flexible, quick, powerful, durable, energetic, sharp - every superlative you can think of. I want to be it. And I know I have the ability in me because even though I've wasted it thus far, I still have the raw potential for fitness and power, as well as good health. I'm interested in Yoga also. I also want to be able to fight. Martial Arts is definitely something I want to do, regardless. Picking one is hard for me at the moment, but I'm definitely going to take it up. Maybe even cross train in more than one. For someone who is a bit of a pacifist in many ways, I like fighting and action. I've only had 3 actual fights in my life (w1 l2), but I have always had an attraction to action and now it's becoming more physical as I get older. 3) Become financially free. The best way I feel I can achieve this is entrepreneurship. I have many ideas, I am educating myself financially, and I have big goals that I wish to achieve for the benefit of myself and for others. I want to be able to have an empire, not just to attain power, but to be in a position to redistribute power to those who have none or believe they have none. My ambition now has to be matched by my drive. 4) Continue studying and teach other. I am a student by nature, I love to learn and study new things. I think I will always be looking for knowledge and trying to expand that base. Also, I love to share information with people and will strive to do that as best I can. 5) Build a social network. I'm kind of already part of a huge one, but I'm connected to a lot of people by default, instead of my own actual socialization. So I'm going to try and focus more on this alongside everything else, and try and increase my social intelligence and try and help others do what they need to do and encourage them as best I can. Now that I have outlined what I'm going to do both online and offline, I will definitely work a lot smarter than I have done before. I don't even think I have to work SUPER hard to do all of those things above, it just seems like that because I'm lazy . But honestly, I have been through a big change in the last 12 months. I've quit smoking weed, I've gained a lot of knowledge about fitness, health, business, finance and myself. All things I haven't known anything about (except myself ). But I felt that this post is simply a confirmation to me of what I have to do and just to illustrate to everyone that despite your supposed limitations, it's always good to inject a healthy dose of optimism to your life and at least aim for the big time, even if it seems hard to get there. I'll continue to post updates here 3 Link to post Share on other sites
threebyfate Posted May 22, 2012 Share Posted May 22, 2012 Straight up, I think you'll make it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted May 22, 2012 Share Posted May 22, 2012 Everything you've outlined is DOABLE. The concern I have is that you have included three goals that take an incredible amount of time/energy/focus. - becoming a master at music - becoming a master athlete - becoming an entrepreneur None of them are out of the realm of possibility, but they all require a LOT of yourself. Every successful entrepreneur I have known lives and breathes their company and would never have time for being a music master on the side. So my advice is to make sure you keep balance in your life, balance work and play so you stay a well-rounded person, and lastly, don't expect so much out of yourself that you end up disappointed in yourself. Make it about moving forward and getting better, not just about reaching your goal. As long as you are moving forward, you should feel good about yourself. One more comment - martial arts/fighting and being a master musician may not work together well. If you do something to permanently damage your hand or arm, you will be diminishing your ability to play instruments. You may want to put some real thought into this, because part of being a MASTER at something is prioritizing its importance. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
threebyfate Posted May 22, 2012 Share Posted May 22, 2012 I dunno. The manifesto is an idealized list. He'll probably come to some happy medium, whatever that turns out to be whether none, one, a few or all. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ThaWholigan Posted May 22, 2012 Author Share Posted May 22, 2012 Straight up, I think you'll make it. Thank you Everything you've outlined is DOABLE. The concern I have is that you have included three goals that take an incredible amount of time/energy/focus. - becoming a master at music - becoming a master athlete - becoming an entrepreneur None of them are out of the realm of possibility, but they all require a LOT of yourself. Every successful entrepreneur I have known lives and breathes their company and would never have time for being a music master on the side. So my advice is to make sure you keep balance in your life, balance work and play so you stay a well-rounded person, and lastly, don't expect so much out of yourself that you end up disappointed in yourself. Make it about moving forward and getting better, not just about reaching your goal. As long as you are moving forward, you should feel good about yourself. One more comment - martial arts/fighting and being a master musician may not work together well. If you do something to permanently damage your hand or arm, you will be diminishing your ability to play instruments. You may want to put some real thought into this, because part of being a MASTER at something is prioritizing its importance. Well, my business ideas are very much centered around my musicianship, so they will tie in with each other. My mother also expressed the same concerns about martial arts and playing instruments. She is always telling me to protect my hands as they are central to my career. My father, had no such concerns, he says he has faith in my ability to be careful . Dad seems to be the only one who doesn't try and map out my destiny, he just gives me some zen like advice every now and then and helps me with health issues. All I can ask for really lol. I think that for me personally, all those goals are flexible and reachable as a group of objectives. I think that they will take a lot from me, but I have a lot to give really. I think I will never know exactly how capable or powerful I am unless I go for these goals. Even failing to get there excites me at the moment . I find that I have been stagnant for years and I haven't been at peace. But whenever I'm moving, doing something, going in my own direction, I find peace in my movement, peace in always doing something, peace in my work. I think it's telling that after years of not doing much, I've come to this realization. It's kind of refreshing. Thanks for your post though, those are all valid concerns of mine that I shall definitely consider Link to post Share on other sites
pteromom Posted May 23, 2012 Share Posted May 23, 2012 My mother also expressed the same concerns about martial arts and playing instruments. She is always telling me to protect my hands as they are central to my career. My father, had no such concerns, he says he has faith in my ability to be careful . I think no matter how careful you are in FIGHTING, there's always a second person to consider, and they won't necessarily be careful. Even if YOU are being careful, someone could definitely break your hand. But it's your life! Link to post Share on other sites
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