TO Tony

[SGA]

Tony thanks for your email. I have just been busy to reply. Will reply ASAP.

 

Wanted to know if I had a bf and now we have broken up. He borrowed money from my father more than a year ago and still has not returned it. I knmow he is running from UK for a bank fraud and I just out of HATRED and FRUSTRATION feel like informing the authorities of his where abouts.

 

Do you think this would be right? I have been literally begging him to return the money he borrowed from my father and his attitude is "what can you do if I do not return the moeny?" and I do not feel like letting him get away with it. If i inform the authorities his career would be ruined and he might end up in prison. Someone tell me would this be right?

[Tony T]

Two things going here.

 

First, never, ever loan, or allow a member of your family to loan one of your boyfriends more than a very modest sum of money. It is terribly wrong for a man to ask his girlfriend or any member of her family to borrow money, even if he is engaged to her. If a man has to borrow money from you because he has insufficient credit elsewhere and is financially irresponsible, that is your cue to dump him.

 

Second, it is your obligation to report him to authorities if you have actual evidence that he committed a crime. If he told you he did and how he did it, that will be sufficient. If you have paperwork or other hard evidence, that is even better.

 

Turning him in has nothing to do with getting him back or anything. In America, failure to report this type of crime once you are made aware of it is called obstruction of justice and is a crime. However, I absolutely must warn you that you cannot use a threat of turning him in so that you can get your father's money back from him. That is a crime too, called extortion. You must simply report him to authorities. It is doubtful that your dad will ever get his money because someone like this has either already spent it or has hidden it in such a fashion authorities will not find it.

[SGA]

I do not want the money back but more like I want him to learn tough lessons in life. The only thing is that he might end up in prison and i feel that I loved this guy once and how could I be doing this to him?

 

I have all the bank papers with me. They have sent court summons and all to the address and I have all those with me.

 

I am more in a moral dilemma. I am kind of wanting to take revenge.

[Tony T]

This guy did NOT love you if he borrowed money from your family he did not intend to repay and he commited serious crimes without regard to how you would be affected.

 

I never think our motivation for doing anything should be for obtaining revenge. That simply takes too much energy and when the dust settles there really isn't revenge.

 

Be very careful on how you report him to authorites. Try to stay annoymous. If he is the type of guy he seems, in the end, HE could be the one to get revenge on you. Be careful, he could be very dangerous. This whole thing smells like rotten fish from EVERY ANGLE.

 

You need to do whatever it is you want to do and move past this. You are wasting precious days of your life being preoccupied with this guy and his deeds.

[Nina]

There's nothing wrong with turning him in. First of all, everyone should take responsibility for their actions and if they lakc the moral fiber to do so, it must be done for them.

 

I have a friend who is in prison now and I have another friend who went to prison. Both of them knew what they ahd done wrong adn they turned themelves in because they were being men and taking responsibility.

 

And if you get revenge in the process, why is that bad?

[Tony T]

If your post was directed to me, I will pay you $1,000,000 if you can show where I said there was anything wrong with turning him in. Cashiers check payable to you!!!