Author nanbullen Posted June 2, 2012 Author Share Posted June 2, 2012 My ex is out to date again, and I can't help but feel crushed all over again. I know I'm not ready to date anyone seriously but why do I also have this feeling that maybe I should get out there? However, I can't help but feel like I'm traumatized about the whole thing not to mention everything that's happened to me in the past. They say the problem with me is that I'm too nice, to a fault. They say men love b*tches, but being a b*tch is just not me. I don't think I can change who I am and I don't really want to if its only purpose is to keep a man. I'm not ready to date either! But when I think about him going out and having sex with somebody else, while i sit around with my girlfriends, it makes me nauseated.It makes me feel somewhat better when I tell myself that my ex has major problems with commitment and depression and a bunch of other issues that will make it impossible for him to have a successful relationship with any of these women, and empty sex won't make him feel any better.At his age, it won't be easy to change...especially since he doesn't think there's anything wrong with him. I feel like right now I just don't have it in me to go through another relationship, or even meet somebody. I don't want to get hurt again. If and until I figure out WHY i'm codependent and attract these men, i'm doomed to go through break up after break up. And it doesn't get any easier! I don't think men like bitches necessarily. They like women that are confident about themselves. It's hard to fake that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nanbullen Posted June 2, 2012 Author Share Posted June 2, 2012 I have learned that you should never use texts or facebook to express your feelings to someone, if they are important, it should be done face to face. I go out of my way to keep my distance, I just fear the day I might see her again still I don't let that fear stop me from living Amen! Texts are evil. I did most of the damage to my relationship with text messages. I will never discuss anything important thru yahoo Msgr, facebook, text. Possibly email...but I doubt it. Link to post Share on other sites
Jingle14 Posted June 2, 2012 Share Posted June 2, 2012 I've been away from the forum forever, but I felt a resurgence of all the horrible feelings again, after thirteen months. Dreadful. I know what you mean by having all the fun and joy gone. We have to face that we derived a lot from the relationship we were in. I felt when she left that a lot that was me went with her. You're right to work on yourself and to "be alone" for awhile. Do you think that your feelings come and go in waves, as in, some days you feel over it and some as though he just left? 13 months! I thought I was the only one to be struggling to 'get over' this, but mine has been 12 months now. I feel for you, it's just vile. Link to post Share on other sites
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