kono Posted May 26, 2012 Share Posted May 26, 2012 Is parent's love to a child always unconditional? I know my father loves me, but I don't his love is unconditional. If I don't listen to him or argue with him, he would become very angry. I am in my 30s, so I am an adult. I feel my relationship with my father has been quite painful. I want to sort this thing out. Link to post Share on other sites
bean1 Posted May 28, 2012 Share Posted May 28, 2012 You don't have the like someone to love them unconditionally. I love my son unconditionally but if he grows up to be an *******, I might not like him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
pink_sugar Posted May 28, 2012 Share Posted May 28, 2012 Just because you don't agree or argue over things from time to time doesn't mean there isn't unconditional love. Unconditional love means you love the person no matter how many arguments you have or how many times they piss you off. However, not all parents are cabable of this. This is why we see so many crazy things on the news about parents neglecting and even killing their own children. Link to post Share on other sites
princess_e Posted July 15, 2012 Share Posted July 15, 2012 I don't see it as an issue of whether or not he unconditionally loves you or not. It seems to be maybe an issue of dominance with him? like in certain cultures- more in the past but still happens now (ie: eastern), parents are not only very strict with their child but demand complete obedience regardless of the situation, who's right or wrong, diff opinions, etc. My grandma is a little like that, she can be wrong in a situation but will throw a fit if her children and grandchildren don't listen to her anyway. I think your dad maybe has some problems accepting you for you, he seems to want you to be like him. Try explaining to him that you love him and everything but you wont be the exact person he is, and you want to be your own person and he should support you! I had this issue with my mother before too but I think I have said it enough for her to understand that we will have our differences even if she is my own mother. with patience and proper explanations there is hope maybe your dad will be a little more open minded to your different opinions, morals, beliefs, choices etc. Although he would like for you to be just like him (just assuming this from reading your post) it is good that you are your own person and you shouldn't let him guilt you into changing that. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Silly_Girl Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 I agree with princess e. I think it's a dominance issue. And sometimes parents find it hard to trust their kids, even as adults. I mean they find it hard to trust them to make good decisions and they become frustrated (angry?). Your father needs to respect that you are your own person and you are within your rights to do your own thing. It does not mean he does not love you unconditionally. Is he there for you if you go against his wishes? Or has he ever suggested that if you do XYZ he'll disown you? Link to post Share on other sites
kizmet74 Posted July 20, 2012 Share Posted July 20, 2012 I read something somewhere said: "Don't worry when I argue with you. Worry when I quit arguing with you because that means there's nothing left to fight for." There's ups and downs in every relationship. Parents argue with one another, parents argue with their "kids" (especially the grown "kids"), wives argue with husbands, even best friends have their arguements. It in no way means they don't love one another. Link to post Share on other sites
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