Moving to the next level.

[ahmedelsaka]

hey,

im gonna be fast,

I have liked this girl, and she had a crush on another guy, and he rejected her, so i began talking to her and by time, we have turned to best friends, but the guy that she had a crush on said that he wanted to be her boyfriend, but the real reason was that he wanted to her to kiss him and he wanted to touch her, and i dont know what happened with them but they have broke up, me and her are now friends, and now i want to be her boyfriend, what should I say to her? i want to be her boyfriend but i dont want to ruin our friendship and i also dont want her to reject me, i love her. what can I do?

 

Thanks really, i need the help, i want to be with her cause i really love her and not for anything else, i really do.

 

thanks again to anyone who replied

[oldshirt]

You are already in the 'friendzone,' so you are pretty much screwed right from the start.

 

You sound very young so this will be a good lesson to learn from so that you don't end up making the same mistakes over and over again in the future.

 

Here is what I wish someone would have clued me into when I was young so I wouldn't have spent so many years in the friendzone - if you want a romantic/sexual relationship with someone you must start out the relationship in a sexual manner.

 

I know this goes against everything you have ever been taught but it's the God's honest truth.

 

You can not put yourself into the role of a nonsexual "friend" and be a woman's cuddle-bunny and little asexual buddy that coddles her feelings and gives her a shoulder to cry on and then expect her to have sexual feelings for you later down the road.

 

That concept made cute movies back in the 80s but it very very very rarely works out that way in real life.

 

If you want someone to be a GF you need to be flirty, teasing, dominant and not be afraid to make romantic and sexual overtures.

 

Will you run the risk of being rejected? ABSOLUTELY!!!!!!! You will be rejected a lot. That's why you don't want to be someone's "friend" first. You don't want to establish a frienship first because then you will be emotionally invested and you won't want to ruin the friendship by making a sexual advance (WHICH YOU LIKELY WILL).

 

If you want a full-service relationship that includes romance/sexuality then you need to lead-off with the sexuality and establish romantic/sexual attraction first and develop the companionship, trust, fondness etc afterwards.

 

Girls, Oprah, your grandmother and society as a whole will tell you that you should establish friendship first before romance/sexuality but they do that because they are afraid of men becoming playa's and using women for sex. So they take the decent guys and turn them into eunichs and pussys so that guys live out many of their days frustrated and disenfranchised by being stuck in the friendzone while all the jerks are getting the girls and treating them badly.

 

If you want a girlfriend do the exact opposite of what you are doing now and you tell me who was right in the end, me or Oprah?

[ahmedelsaka]

You are already in the 'friendzone,' so you are pretty much screwed right from the start.

 

You sound very young so this will be a good lesson to learn from so that you don't end up making the same mistakes over and over again in the future.

 

Here is what I wish someone would have clued me into when I was young so I wouldn't have spent so many years in the friendzone - if you want a romantic/sexual relationship with someone you must start out the relationship in a sexual manner.

 

I know this goes against everything you have ever been taught but it's the God's honest truth.

 

You can not put yourself into the role of a nonsexual "friend" and be a woman's cuddle-bunny and little asexual buddy that coddles her feelings and gives her a shoulder to cry on and then expect her to have sexual feelings for you later down the road.

 

That concept made cute movies back in the 80s but it very very very rarely works out that way in real life.

 

If you want someone to be a GF you need to be flirty, teasing, dominant and not be afraid to make romantic and sexual overtures.

 

Will you run the risk of being rejected? ABSOLUTELY!!!!!!! You will be rejected a lot. That's why you don't want to be someone's "friend" first. You don't want to establish a frienship first because then you will be emotionally invested and you won't want to ruin the friendship by making a sexual advance (WHICH YOU LIKELY WILL).

 

If you want a full-service relationship that includes romance/sexuality then you need to lead-off with the sexuality and establish romantic/sexual attraction first and develop the companionship, trust, fondness etc afterwards.

 

Girls, Oprah, your grandmother and society as a whole will tell you that you should establish friendship first before romance/sexuality but they do that because they are afraid of men becoming playa's and using women for sex. So they take the decent guys and turn them into eunichs and pussys so that guys live out many of their days frustrated and disenfranchised by being stuck in the friendzone while all the jerks are getting the girls and treating them badly.

 

If you want a girlfriend do the exact opposite of what you are doing now and you tell me who was right in the end, me or Oprah?

 

but now is there a way to escape the friendzone, i dont want to try over, what i really want is to be with this girl exactly, i know that this might sound desparate but i love her and her exactly

[oldshirt]

but now is there a way to escape the friendzone, i dont want to try over, what i really want is to be with this girl exactly, i know that this might sound desparate but i love her and her exactly

 

The way to get out of the friendzone is break off contact with her and go out and be with about a dozen or so other women so that you are NOT desparate and do NOT see her as your only chance for love.

 

Being with a dozen other women will also help you learn how to flirt and to tease and to sexually express yourself so that you don't get stuck in the friendzone.

 

After you have been away from her for awhile and have had sex with a dozen or so women, when you return you will have more social skills, a different attitude and a higher degree of sexual confidence that women find sexually attractive. In short you will seem like a different person and one that might see as a potential sexual suitor as opposed to a little gay cuddle-bunny.

[Rogue Casanova]

Sad to say it but this info is spot on, if you try for it now your ****ed but if you leave work on yourself and sleep with some other woman and come back after 6 months to a year, you'll be better off.

[gabrielly]

If you really love,you must say it to her!If not,it will be better still be friends!

[shorty7]

Tell her the truth. Tell her you love her, and if she can't stay with you as a friend regardless how she feels about you, then you know how good of a "friend" she is to you.

 

And who knows, she might be a real class act and help you get over her depending on how you respond back to her reaction.

[Rogue Casanova]

Not to be the ******* on here, but he wants this particular girl, not to be friends with her, if he wanted that he wouldn't be on here asking for help. If he wants this girl, the best advice for him is to do what was recommended and break contact, not to sound like a dick but **** her feelings, what about his, he is the one stuck in this loop and hasn't done anything about it. I know the headspace that he is in because I was there twice 6 yrs ago, but I did what I just recommended to him. Your getting all of this advice man but I'm going to say this, "You miss 100 percent of the shots that you don't take"

use this time to better yourself and come back a different person, be the hero of your own life, so you can then be the hero of hers.

 

-Rogue