A slim chance of getting back with ex.

[Fireo]

Okay, so a brief history between the ex and I. We dated for a year, and everything was great. Honestly, we didn't even fight once, maybe a minor disagreement, but usually was quickly resolved. It was all sunshine and rainbows.

 

I was hit with a tremendous amount of work related stress all at once, and was a bit short tempered. So, after a series of fights about nothing, we broke up.

 

Now, a few months later, I break NC and send her a few jokes via texts. We start talking again, and we eventually met up for coffee. She has a new BF now, which I expected, and it was cool with me. We were able to share a few hours laughing, teasing each other, and just generally enjoying each other's company.

 

A few nights later, she invites me out for drinks. The first thing she mentions, is how jealous he got, even though she openly told him that we were meeting up, and obviously it was more of a catching up than anything else. Well, he decided they needed a small break because he wasn't happy with the whole situation. But at the same time, he sent her a text every ten min asking how she was doing, weekend plans, etc. She was getting quite annoyed with the neediness.

 

The night was much like our coffee "date", only with more flirting and friendly touching. Whenever I asked about the new guy and if she was happy with him, she talked about him more like he was a place holder, than a long-term partner. But whenever our past was brought up (her doing), she wasn't shy about mentioning our last few weeks together, and how miserable she was because of it.

 

We ended the night on a good note, and she gave me a tight hug, and was slow to release it. Now, we text a few times a day, but nothing too heavy.

 

So, how do I win her back? How do I prove that I wont hurt her again and learned how to better vent my frustrations?

 

Thanks all

 

TLDR version- We broke up because of my stress. She has a new boyfriend she really isn't that into. Maybe she likes me more, but is afraid of getting hurt again.

[Fireo]

Wow, that was actually a good analysis of the situation. Thanks. And thinking about it, you're right, I don't want her leaving him for me, cause what will stop her from doing the same to me assuming we get back together.

 

So, what about this then... I briefly met one of her friends who was at the bar. How do I ask for her number from my ex without creating a whole new world of drama? Technically, she thinks I think we're just friends, or something like that. So a "friend" should have no problem helping another "friend" since they are already taken. Right?

Edited May 28, 2012 by Fireo

[Million.to.1]

But then YOU would creating your own love triangle.

 

Don't ask your ex for her friends number! That is asking for drama. You shouldn't date your ex's friends unless a significant amount of time has past ie, years, and your ex should not be involved in any match-making.

 

Bad Form.

[Fireo]

So I thought about it, I don't care about this whole love triangle thing. I want her back. How do I make it happen? We're hanging out this weekend.

[Gulf-Delta]

So I thought about it, I don't care about this whole love triangle thing. I want her back. How do I make it happen? We're hanging out this weekend.

 

Since she likes/liked you...and she left because of stress, be a laid back version of yourself.

[Fireo]

Since she likes/liked you...and she left because of stress, be a laid back version of yourself.

 

My friend, I have been the epitome of the west coast surfer, the same man she fell in love with. What's the best way to make my move? Or do I just go for a kiss and see what happens?

[caligirl23]

So I thought about it, I don't care about this whole love triangle thing. I want her back. How do I make it happen? We're hanging out this weekend.

 

 

Tell her point-blank exatly that. "I want you back" and let it go from there....

[babycrapgreen]

I think it's too soon to declare you want her back because you've just hungout twice?. You're doing fine by just hanging out again. The fact that she's returning your flirtation, whatever you're doing is great. I say wait a month and start hinting towards your feelings gradually. Say something like," I miss this.".