How can I re-attract my ex-girlfriend and get that "spark" back?

[lucifer2019]

My ex-girlfriend of six months just broke up with me three weeks ago. Needless to say I was devastated, and I'm still trying to understand what went wrong. One thing she mentioned during the split was a loss of attraction towards me, and that she'd rather have me as a close friend than a boyfriend. Whenever I think about our past together, especially those first four months or so, I get really sad and nostalgic because I know we had a really special connection and I can't understand why her attraction towards me faded while mine towards her did not. Most importantly, I want to re-attract her so that we can hopefully get back together, and stay together this time. Any advice would be much appreciated.

[AG0NIST]

Your best bet is to give her some space for several months, while you work on yourself. Get into the gym and start working out. Give her a reason to become attracted to you again. Better yourself all around. If you've been looking at school, a career change, business start-up and so on, now would be the time to start working towards those goals. Give her something more to be attracted to. Even if she doesn't come back, you'll be much more happy with yourself. In the long run, you'll probably lose your attraction towards her.

[oranged]

My ex-girlfriend of six months just broke up with me three weeks ago. Needless to say I was devastated, and I'm still trying to understand what went wrong. One thing she mentioned during the split was a loss of attraction towards me, and that she'd rather have me as a close friend than a boyfriend. Whenever I think about our past together, especially those first four months or so, I get really sad and nostalgic because I know we had a really special connection and I can't understand why her attraction towards me faded while mine towards her did not. Most importantly, I want to re-attract her so that we can hopefully get back together, and stay together this time. Any advice would be much appreciated.

 

good luck. it won't be easy.

[caligirl23]

My ex-girlfriend of six months just broke up with me three weeks ago. Needless to say I was devastated, and I'm still trying to understand what went wrong. One thing she mentioned during the split was a loss of attraction towards me, and that she'd rather have me as a close friend than a boyfriend. Whenever I think about our past together, especially those first four months or so, I get really sad and nostalgic because I know we had a really special connection and I can't understand why her attraction towards me faded while mine towards her did not. Most importantly, I want to re-attract her so that we can hopefully get back together, and stay together this time. Any advice would be much appreciated.

 

Whatever you do, do NOT be her friend. I promise you, absolutely PROMISE that this would be a big mistake! People who have stronger feelings for a person when the other doesn't share in those feelings almost always get hurt and because you still want this relationship and she is saying she doesn't, you are setting yourself up for heartbreak. Some think that if they are friends that the other person will see how great the "friend" is in some way and come back, but that is wrong. She will only see you as a friend and the relationship will have changed to only that. I say give her space. People are attracted to what they cannot have. So, once you pull back and put in her mind that you are fine without her, that is when she will have the opportunity to think.

 

I am in the same position as you, and I said "hell no" to being just friends. in fact, when he realized I had given up and was moving on, that is when the texts started again- silly excuses to contact me, etc. I am not hopeful will will get back together, although I would like to, but I know that I feel better that I am not his "friend" and not there to see him move on with others when it is me I want him to be with. Don't do that to yourself.

 

Try as hard as you can to keep yourself busy- go to a gym, get a new hobby, hang with friends. Do NOT contact her and if she initiates contact whether it is a text or a call, ignore it. It will be hard as hell, but ignore it and peak her curiousity. Make her want to call again or text again. THEN , you respond with a simple "Oh, yeah, sorry I didn't call you back. I was busy". Keep it light and simple!!