Minnie Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 [color=blue][/color] Dear freinds- I have to tell you that i have been trying to make changes and trying to fix past concerns....so I have been emailing colleagues about some changes since the ex left. No one responds. It is embarrassing. I am sure they get the messages.....I need their encouragement and support not only with the business but also with healing and I get no response. I am beginnning to think it is all just because I am their entertainment. Like a fish on a line. How can I rally some dignity and move forward.? Do I stop talking to our past circle cold turkey, these colleagues or do I just keep on email up dates and hope they all are oblivious to my pain. ? I wish I did not need them so much. I still want to be connected some how and I want to have their advice and encouragement and I seem to get no where. I am afraid to call.....rejection completely. They perhaps have no interest to meet with me at all and I am just entertainment. I did meet with one mutual friend and all we could do was talk about him and it was rather wonderful. But it was also draining on her end. I think most everyone is rather worried or rather tired of it. And I cannot seem to move fdrward. I feel rather stuck. I know he is fine. No contact is fine with him. Just looks ill when we pass. ....have to learn to be in same office. Pathetic that I ever loved him and cannot seem to get past it and love him still. Wish I could move completely and have to see him at work and it is so painful and I feel like we are so self conscious and pass each other like we are wounded beyond repair. ....no one else notices. Still, work has to get done and perhaps I should just throw all efforts away and really leave and be free of it. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 Your colleagues probably don't wish to be involved in your personal life. You would do better to seek a group or club for separated/divorced or just hurting women. I recommend not emailing people at work anymore. It may end up getting you in trouble. Have you got any sort of employee assistance programs you can go to? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Minnie Posted June 29, 2004 Author Share Posted June 29, 2004 Ah yes....likely that is so. I cannot seem to seperate a coworker from personal life and it is heartbreaking. If we did not work together that would be fine. But it is very twisted up and intermingled. He worked for me and now I work next to him and life has to go on. It is a mess. As it is If I look at it from others view point it is perhaps clearer. It is not their fault and I likely have been more than a bit emotional and need to get past it. What can they do. I just wish someone would say to me It s ok. ....I will listen and you are doing fine . And get excited with me about the company goals. I miss him terriby and it is also my own need to have a team in place with the goals we all set together. I just cannot get the team motivated and I cannot keep my personal life from interfering with work. Silly me. Spend most of the day avoiding everyone and when I am alone. I am usually crying or about to cry or recovering from a good cry. Link to post Share on other sites
sportsloving Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 Is it possible for you to take some time off to deal with this on your own? I understand the need to be reassured that things will work out (and they will), but I don't think emailing your coworkers and telling them your personal business is a professionally good idea. Talk to your friends, write letters and destroy them, start a journal, join a support group ... do anything you feel will help you recover but do not depend on your coworkers to give you the support that you need or want. They work with both of you, that alone puts them in an awkward situation. Best of luck to you, and of course you can always count LS as your support group Link to post Share on other sites
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