The dreaded college long distance relationship

[countrygirl2012]

Hey everyone!

I've never been a part of any websites like this but I'm having a really hard time with the whole moving to college thing so I decided it was time to join one with people in similar situations. Now before anyone starts telling me I'm too young or whatever, I realize this, that's half my problem.

So quick background info. I'm 18, my boyfriend is 19. We've been together for 7 months, which isn't a very long time but I've been in love with this boy since I was 14...He's my dream boy. We have so much in common and he's the sweetest boy ever. He'd do absolutely anything for me.

In August I'm moving 1200 miles away from home to go to college. At first I wasn't even considering long distance, I'm only 18 after all but like I said I've been in love with this boy for a long time and I know if we broke up without even giving it a shot then I'd always wonder if I made the right choice. I could honestly see myself marrying him someday in the future, definitely not ready to settle down anytime soon. He's willing to sacrifice absolutely everything for me. He has a really good full time job here, all his family and friends are here and he told me the other day that if he had to move in order to stay with me he'd do it in a heartbeat. He'd leave absolutely everything just to be with me. While I do love him I'm not quite ready to make the same sacrifices. I really do want to be with him in the future but I'm too young to make such big commitments right now. I feel like I'm being really unfair to him. I've been honest with him about everything and he always tells me he just wants me to succeed and he wants what is best for me. I'm having a really hard time talking to him about this though because well it's just not easy. I just feel guilty all the time. It's not even that I don't love him or anything I just am not ready for as big of a commitment as he is. I don't really know what I'm hoping to achieve by posting this...I guess I'm just wondering if anyone else has advice or similar situations?

[catluvr2]

I'm actually going to start a long distance relationship this fall with my boyfriend going away to college. We're been together for almost 2 and a half years and I love him so much. I did have huge anxiety about it but I'm feeling much better since my boyfriend and I just talked about it. My boyfriend is transfering to a college 3 hours away for computer science and he will be away for 2 1/2 years. We recently talked about it and he wants to make it work. I know we both will be busy, me trying to get into a nursing school, and him with his crazy school schedule, but just as long as he makes an effort in this relationship then I'll be happy. I know you're young but if you really think you have someone good then hold on to them!!

[ladyabstrused]

It's good that you've been honest with him about how you feel. You should always communicate honest feelings in a relationship with each other..no matter how difficult it may be. If he truly loves and cares about you, he will understand that you have your own needs and wants as well and that the both of you need to be able to compromise or come to an agreement on things.

 

There is nothing wrong with feeling what you're feeling. You shouldn't have to give up everything if you don't want to give up everything for him. Don't do things for the sake of doing them while you're suffering in silence. That was me for quite a long time...eventually it will all explode. So, don't feel guilty. As much as you respect him for the things he needs or wants, he should be able to do the same for you.