Talk of suicide and doing it

[avon20]

So is it true that people who talk about suicide don't do it?

[Anela]

I don't think so, but I can't speak for anyone else. I've spoken about it, because I wanted to do it.

 

I also came across this some weeks back:

For Jeff | dooce®

[Mr Scorpio]

No. You cannot make that generalization. People who talk about it have been thinking about it, and thinking about it is setting the stage for eventually doing it.

[d'Arthez]

Bear in mind that people who make such a statement "I am going to kill myself" often feel they have good reason to be miserable. That there is no magic cure available to them, that will make everything alright.

 

You must remember, different people go about these things in a different manner. Some will be announcing it, some will not. Some people who are contemplating suicide will change their behaviors, whilst others will keep on acting as if nothing is wrong. Just don't make the false assumption that if someone says they will commit suicide, they will not do it. Some of them actually will do it.

 

I nearly lost my youngest brother to suicide. He did not announce his intention to kill himself, nor did he change his behavior much. But thankfully he is still with us, and thankfully he is working on overcoming his issues. The path ahead of him will be sheer hell. But hopefully, in a few years time, he can be happy with who he is.

[olddirtyspatula]

There isn't a rule about this, everyone is so different.

Some people kill themselves without letting anyone know how bad they were feeling.

Some people talk about it with the intention of doing it, but are also reaching out and looking for a reason not to. Give them all the attention you can muster. And then give some more, and have everyone else do the same.

Some people (a very very very small percentage, so don't over generalize this) use it to manipulate people.

 

If you think someone you care about is suicidal, talk to them about it. If you're afraid it might push them over the edge, don't worry about it. You won't say anything they haven't already thought, and you saying The S Word won't be the thing that kills them. They'll probably be happy to be recognized.

 

If you think they're using it to get what they want from you... well... think about how bad a person must feel in order to think that using one of the lowest possible manipulation tactics is the best way to get their needs met. I don't know about that, if you should see through it to see how high their needs are and give the best you can,or run run run and never look back. it's up to you. Tough call.

[Engadget]

I talk about it sometimes, but I'd never do it. I'd just rather be dead than put up with the bull**** I do some times.

[Anela]

I talk about it sometimes, but I'd never do it. I'd just rather be dead than put up with the bull**** I do some times.

 

I talked about it, because I was scared. The idea of going through with it, how much it might hurt, that it might not work, the idea of the pain that others might feel if I did it? All stop me. But the less I feel that it would hurt someone for me to do it, and the more the feeling grows - the more I mull possibilities over in my mind - I'm sure that I would do it.

 

I've talked about it, and I've gone more than once without even letting on what I was feeling.

[Trimmer]

So is it true that people who talk about suicide don't do it?

To put our replies in context, it's important to know: why are you asking? Are you just curious from a detached, academic point of view? Have you been talking about taking your own life? Has someone near you been talking about it? It may not change the objective answer, but these are all different situations, obviously...

 

My important thought:

There isn't a rule about this, everyone is so different.

If you're faced with someone who is actually talking about it, then generalizing from a "rule" isn't going to guarantee you an accurate answer for that person.

[Engadget]

I talked about it, because I was scared. The idea of going through with it, how much it might hurt, that it might not work, the idea of the pain that others might feel if I did it? All stop me. But the less I feel that it would hurt someone for me to do it, and the more the feeling grows - the more I mull possibilities over in my mind - I'm sure that I would do it.

 

I've talked about it, and I've gone more than once without even letting on what I was feeling.

 

Sometimes saying it out loud, or to someone else helps you realize how serious it is.

[d'Arthez]

I've talked about it, and I've gone more than once without even letting on what I was feeling.

My brother did the same thing. He has always been a closed person. Thus his silence before he tried to get out was nothing out of the ordinary. In fact to this day he is still very closed about talking about his life in any shape of form.

 

However, that does not mean that he does not undertake steps to transform his life. He knows he can fully rely on his family if something does come up, or if he feels troubled by what is going on in his life. It is of critical importance that he has a few friends and family members whom he deeply trusts.

 

I do hope you have a few friends or family members who are there for you Anela. Even if they are just online friends, they can make a world of difference.

[HeavenOrHell]

Not true, no.

 

 

 

So is it true that people who talk about suicide don't do it?

[SpiralOut]

No it's not true.

 

They may talk about because they are very serious on their intentions but have doubts.

Some people may never say anything before going through with it.

 

But some people speak of suicide because they want to get their feelings out. Maybe they wish they could but will never actually do it because of their religious beliefs, family responsibilities, etc. However, this doesn't mean they won't ever change their minds later down the road.

 

It's not easy to generalize something like this.

 

Why do you ask this question? Do you know someone who is talking about suicide?

Edited June 20, 2012 by SpiralOut

[Nikki Sahagin]

When I was 19 I wanted to kill myself after a bad break up. I confided to my mum that I didn't want to be alive anymore. I would NEVER have had the guts/cowardice to take my own life (whichever way you see it) but basically I had just resigned myself to life and would quite happily have died. I couldn't have taken my own life, but I quite wanted something else to take it for me naturally. I think often when people confide that they are having suicidal thoughts it means they want help and they want to talk about it. It's when people don't discuss it at all with others that they do not want help and they have resigned themselves to the idea that they might actually go through with it.

 

Keeping people in the loop about your thoughts means you are giving them an opportunity to help you.

[gaius]

Many talk about it just to manipulate for attention, some are genuine though. It can be dangerous to challenge the fakers. Often they will make some kind of half-assed attempt just to prove you wrong.

[NXS]

It's not true, my dad talked about it for months and then did it.

[CopingGal]

It's not true, my dad talked about it for months and then did it.

 

I am sorry that happened.

[spiderowl]

No, not necessarily. None of us know whether someone means what they say or not. A person who mentions suicide is giving an indication that they are in distress. Talking about their pain and concerns might help to relieve their distress. You could be a friend and listen non-judgementally as well as encourage them to seek help from a qualified medical professional or mental health organisation offering a helpline or guidance online.

[todreaminblue]

So is it true that people who talk about suicide don't do it?

 

Some will talk about it and not do anything,

Some people will talk, do something and end up in a psych ward,

some people will talk,do something and its too late for the psyche ward

some wont talk and do something and not succeed others will succeed....

 

I did talk I attempted and had a court ordered hospital stay was I serious about it most definately, the reason why I talked about it was the guilt i felt about leaving my family behind but not wanting to live for me and the court order saved me..... electric shock therapy helped and life goes on

[Radu]

So is it true that people who talk about suicide don't do it?

 

 

I'd say that ppl who threaten with suicide don't generally do it, they mention it because they want attention.

Now, if they just talk ... that's different.

[FitChick]

It's tempting at times but I can't do it because I don't want my next life to be worse than this one.

 

If someone talks about suicide then starts giving their stuff away, that is a key sign.

Edited June 23, 2012 by FitChick

[betterdeal]

Mental health charities say that most people who attempt have spoken about it to someone beforehand. I did.

 

http://www.samaritans.org/your_emotional_health/about_suicide/myths_about_suicide.aspx

[Airborne]

It's tempting at times but I can't do it because I don't want my next life to be worse than this one.

You better not. I'd lose interest in coming here.

[Anela]

It's tempting at times but I can't do it because I don't want my next life to be worse than this one.

 

If someone talks about suicide then starts giving their stuff away, that is a key sign.

 

That was me last October. I just woke up one day, as usual, not wanting to get out of bed, and just started thinking about who I would give things to. On really bad days, I was curling up and just waiting for the feelings to pass. Then I found a book on afghans, at a library sale, that included a pretty pattern that I could manage, and started working on that for a friend. I really need to finish that, and get it to her. She lost her father to suicide, four years ago, and has been trying to not go that same route herself.

[broken-and-lost]

To be honest everyone is different you just don't know i've been feeling pretty low since my breakup and i don't really talk about it with anyone but i have started to reach a point were i'm thinking about calling it a day. i don't think about it lightly and i've been thinking about it a long time justifying reason not to do it but sometime you just reach a point were you played your last hand and just want to walk away from the table.

 

Some people will shout about it and decided that at a later stage some won't say anything but be thinking the same.

[writergal]

Myths about suicide

 

Myths about suicide

 

It's a common misconception that someone who talks about suicide won't go through with it. People who talk about suicide either follow through and do it or they don't follow through. Depends on the person and his/her circumstances.

 

6 reasons why people commit suicide