neveragain2493 Posted June 22, 2012 Share Posted June 22, 2012 I dated this guy 3 years ago, and it wasn't that long before he broke up with me. We stayed good friends. Not long after, I met my current boyfriend, whom I've been with for 2 and a half years. This past December, my boyfriend and I took a break where we were almost certain we were breaking up. During our break, my ex and I hung out and considered dating again. My boyfriend and I fixed things, so that didn't happen. Lately, when I've gone out with my friends, my ex has been there. He says hello, maybe gives a hug, but that's it. Last week, when I was out, I texted him to ask if he was there so I could say hello. He was very short. I asked him why we weren't as good friends, and he said he didn't want to "get in the way of my relationship because when we're friends, it seems like things always go further." I told him things were different now, and that we could be friends because that's all I wanted, and he ignored me. A few days ago, I found out his dad was in the hospital, and since he was there for me when my mom passed away this year, I texted him and said, "You probably won't respond, but I hope your dad gets better." He said thanks. I said, "That's what friends are for," and he ignored me. My friends think I'm still in love with my ex, and they hang out with him and his friends, so I know they've told him that I am. I figured that was a big part of it. They keep telling me he won't talk to me because he's upset about us not getting back together, but I think that's bull. I just think he's a jerk who doesn't know what he wants. I want to be able to go out with my friends, but I know he'll be there, and I don't want it to be awkward, but he's always ignoring me. Link to post Share on other sites
january2011 Posted June 22, 2012 Share Posted June 22, 2012 They keep telling me he won't talk to me because he's upset about us not getting back together, but I think that's bull. I just think he's a jerk who doesn't know what he wants. I want to be able to go out with my friends, but I know he'll be there, and I don't want it to be awkward, but he's always ignoring me. By your own words, you were the one that got back with your boyfriend despite getting to the stage of you and your ex considering dating again while you and your boyfriend were on a break. If anything, it looks like you were the one who didn't know what she wanted. Therefore, it isn't a surprise that your ex is hurt over your decision and possibly feeling used as an ego boost or shoulder to cry on. Thus, he doesn't want to be your friend because he's most likely afraid of being used again. I think you need to respect his need to distance himself from you and move on from this - focus on your boyfriend. Besides, why would you want to be friends with a jerk, if that's what you consider your ex to be? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LoveAnimals Posted June 22, 2012 Share Posted June 22, 2012 From what you posted, I dont see him being a jerk. The way I see things is that he may be hurt or angry with you because he feels used or he may have some feelings for you still. I agree with the poster above that it sounds more like you used him not the other way around. At this point I would respect his wishes, and if you so happen to run into him socially then be nice and cordial but try not to overstep your boundaries by being overly friendly and making him uncomfortable. Link to post Share on other sites
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