LonelySarah Posted June 22, 2012 Share Posted June 22, 2012 Back in Dec. after almost 9 years my husband kissed me goodbye and left for work. A few hours later our new landlord came by. We were in the middle of moving into a new. Somehow my husband had gotten him to let us move in before he paid him the rent. He wanted the rent or was going to kick us out. So I called my husband and that's when he told me he wasn't going to pay the rent and he wasn't coming home that he wanted a divorce. That the rent was my problem now. I had no money no job and no transportation because he took our only car. Not only that 90% of our stuff was still at our old place because we hadn't had a chance to go back and get it. Of course now I know this was all by design so he could keep it all. You see he is foreign and had come here on a visa. He lied to me and told me he loved me, made me feel like he loved me, and I fell in love with him and we got married. Now I know it was all a lie he never loved me, he only married me to get his green card and now that he has it hes thrown me away like a piece of trash. He thinks he can just walk a way and leave me with nothing. The last few years before he left were very hard. We fought all the time, well when he was home that is. He was working 2 hours away for 12 to 14 hours a day. At least he said he was working all that time. I don't believe he was anymore. When we fought he would tell me I was a fat ugly B and he didn't love me. That no one loved me or wanted me. I was lonely and depressed so I would eat and I gained weight. Of course he would say all that and then when he wanted to be intimate he expected me to just be ready and when I wasn't in the mood he would get mad and it would start all over again. We always had money problems because we had to pay legal fees and filing fees and transportation to and from meetings and hearings for his green card. He would tell me I needed to get a job to help with the bills and then would get mad I didn't have the time and energy to do all the cooking and cleaning etc and expected him to help. So he would tell me to quit. Meanwhile for years and years I have needed to go to the dentist and we couldn't afford it and had no insurance. So my teeth just got worse and worse. He kept promising me that after his green card got approved we would have the money and I could get them fixed then. Yet another lie. Since he left I haven't had the time or energy to really deal with how I feel about all of this. I have been worrying and stressing about how I am gonna pay the bills and not become homeless. Now that I have finally found a job and have less to worry about it is all coming down on me. I don't miss him. But I am so lonely. I can't sleep at night because all I want is for someone to hold me. I feel so ugly because of my weight and my teeth. Even if I did meet someone that could look past that I don't think I could trust them. I don't understand how I didn't see he was just using me. I feel like a fool. I feel broken. Anyone got any advice? Link to post Share on other sites
M30USA Posted June 22, 2012 Share Posted June 22, 2012 Gosh that is awful. I don't even know what advice to give. Some people are just out for self gain and have no consideration for others as actual human beings with lives and feelings. Link to post Share on other sites
Oncehadluv Posted June 27, 2012 Share Posted June 27, 2012 You married a con artist Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted June 27, 2012 Share Posted June 27, 2012 yeah, thanks, mr obvious, I think she got that..... Link to post Share on other sites
Oncehadluv Posted June 27, 2012 Share Posted June 27, 2012 Revenge would be the best thing you can do, be smart and tactfull tho Link to post Share on other sites
Oncehadluv Posted June 27, 2012 Share Posted June 27, 2012 yeah, thanks, mr obvious, I think she got that..... Braid my coin purse ..... Link to post Share on other sites
stupidgirl22 Posted June 27, 2012 Share Posted June 27, 2012 God I'm so sorry to read this. what a disgusting piece of trash!! Can you report him to the authorities and get him shipped back to where he came from? He needs to be punished, if not by you then someone else! Scum!!! where did you meet him? x Link to post Share on other sites
Author LonelySarah Posted June 28, 2012 Author Share Posted June 28, 2012 (edited) what that guy put you through is pretty terrible. its a shame that people treat others like that, it really is. here is my advice, work on yourself. if youre upset about your weight, drop some pounds. its easy to do. the teeth might be a little harder to fix, but if you make that a serious goal, it can happen too. i know youre in a tough spot right now, and you can either sit around and feel sorry for yourself, or fix the things that are bothering you and become a better, stronger person. i wish you the best. Well I have lost quite a bit of weight since then and am rather happy with how I look now besides the issue with my teeth. I recently went through all the clothes I have that didn't fit before and a bunch of them fit now. I knew I had lost some but didn't realize just how much. I would jump for joy all the way to the dentist if I could just afford it. You married a con artist No S*** Sherlock. Do you seriously think I don't know that already. Revenge would be the best thing you can do, be smart and tactfull tho Trust me I'm working on that. God I'm so sorry to read this. what a disgusting piece of trash!! Can you report him to the authorities and get him shipped back to where he came from? He needs to be punished, if not by you then someone else! Scum!!! where did you meet him? x Trust me he will be punished. He has made my life hell and I am not going to let him get away with it. Or anything else. But like the saying goes revenge is a dish best served cold. I actually met him through a friend. I was having a particularly bad week when I posted the OP. I am feeling a bit better now but still very lonely. Edited June 28, 2012 by LonelySarah Link to post Share on other sites
Plan 9 from OS Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 I feel bad that something like this happened to you. Looks like your best bet is to work on yourself so that you can improve the quality of your life. Self esteem is important, and you already have one goal achieved with the weight loss. But you owe it to yourself to continue on this path to improving your self esteem by getting your teeth fixed. I saw that you already posted that you can't afford a dentist right now. My question is did you pursue it at all or are you assuming that you won't be able to get help for your teeth? I suspect that if you dig into it a little, you may be pleasantly surprised. I found this link, maybe it can help. Finding Low-Cost Dental Care Link to post Share on other sites
GLDheart Posted July 2, 2012 Share Posted July 2, 2012 Anyone got any advice? I'm glad you lost weight if it helps your confidence. Just keep working on you. I also wonder if you can sue your EX for the value of you belongings and half of that car? That may pay for your teeth right there. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LonelySarah Posted July 2, 2012 Author Share Posted July 2, 2012 I feel bad that something like this happened to you. Looks like your best bet is to work on yourself so that you can improve the quality of your life. Self esteem is important, and you already have one goal achieved with the weight loss. But you owe it to yourself to continue on this path to improving your self esteem by getting your teeth fixed. I saw that you already posted that you can't afford a dentist right now. My question is did you pursue it at all or are you assuming that you won't be able to get help for your teeth? I suspect that if you dig into it a little, you may be pleasantly surprised. I found this link, maybe it can help. Finding Low-Cost Dental Care Thanks for the link. I have looked into things a bit. There is a Dental School in Baltimore I could go to. I just have to find a way to get there. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LonelySarah Posted July 2, 2012 Author Share Posted July 2, 2012 I'm glad you lost weight if it helps your confidence. Just keep working on you. I also wonder if you can sue your EX for the value of you belongings and half of that car? That may pay for your teeth right there. I am working on that. Just waiting on a letter from my boss stating how much I make. There is a local non profit that provides legal help for people who can't afford it in civil cases. Should be here any day now. Oh I can't wait! Link to post Share on other sites
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