danny8630 Posted July 2, 2004 Share Posted July 2, 2004 I wish my ex wanted ME back...my ex is a girl and im wonderful to her. But she wants freedom from a boyfriend so im left in the dust. Link to post Share on other sites
lydiamarie Posted July 2, 2004 Share Posted July 2, 2004 there are lots of people out there who are ready for commitment. you deserve one of them. so go find a good one Link to post Share on other sites
Author danny8630 Posted July 2, 2004 Author Share Posted July 2, 2004 it is SOOOOO Hard though to go through the day constantly thinking about her and wanting to call but can't... I've been trying Very Hard to keep my mind off her and to let go and move on, but sometimes i just break down and cant function. Today is the first day i Haven't called her and im sure shes happy that she doesnt have to talk to me, she probably doesn't even miss me like i miss her. I'm sure theres other great people out there its just that in my mind right now she is everything to me, shes beautiful, smart, and has great goals and she was very loving in our relationship. Friends and Family say "let go, move on". But i just can't do it instanly, i mean, i Loved this person and to just drop it and move on? nah. I keep wanting to do things with her but most say just dont even call her. I wanted her to watch 4th of July fireworks with me but who knows, she'll probably be out in the boat having a blast flirting and what not. ACK it kills me thinking about it. Why must life be so difficult at times?!??! Link to post Share on other sites
lydiamarie Posted July 2, 2004 Share Posted July 2, 2004 breaking up is always hard. but the sooner you start pretending like you've forgotten about her, the sooner it will actually start to happen. Link to post Share on other sites
Author danny8630 Posted July 2, 2004 Author Share Posted July 2, 2004 Last night is when i think things really hit the fan for me. I came in at 1am and i was just over it...over all the bullsh*t that i've been going through/feeling. I'm just done. The soonest i will call her is in a few months; as will be hard for me because there is a chance of her "getting with" someone else. Shes not one to sleep around but who knows. Right now seeing her even holding hands with another guy will just crush me inside, its like shes just robbed me of all my love and is juggling it at her convienence. I've started thinking about inviting girls to ride jet ski's with me at my job just so i can try and pull myself out of this binge with a little help of confidence. Link to post Share on other sites
eldslover Posted July 3, 2004 Share Posted July 3, 2004 i know how you feel man! but how long has it been since she left you? i still feel just about the same way you do and me and my ex broke up in february. Link to post Share on other sites
capitald Posted July 3, 2004 Share Posted July 3, 2004 There are good women out there don't despair. Shun the desire to jump into a new thing right away. You might be surprised at the relationship difficulties she may be having now, leaving a good guy for no good reasons, means that her life might have taken a downward spiral which often leads to a very, bad permanant place in the sum total of things. The appearance of having it alll together is not necessarily the reality. If she is rushing out their to sex up boys then she has gone to crap anyway and you don't want her, it means that she has decided to quit the decency game and join the "devils of the land". I always hold that if someone leaves you, your the better person. The person that does the leaving is ALWAYS the lesser, because he/she wouldn't put the work in to make it work provided there was chemistry in the first place. Don't despair, the road is long and the patient win!!! Patience is the virtue of the game and is the whore's lacking. Link to post Share on other sites
Author danny8630 Posted July 3, 2004 Author Share Posted July 3, 2004 to elds...She left me just about a month ago. We agreed to be friends but its much more of a task than i bargained for.But i've come to realize that it doesnt/didn't matter to her whether im her friend or not, she just wants it that way so she doesnt feel bad about this situation..... Right now its 12:00am on July 3rd. She is either A) working at a bar or B) partying, getting drunk, or "dancing" Today is the first day that none of us have tried to call each other. She promises alot but doesn't come through with anything. Example. "we're going to be hanging out ALOT", "We'll talk all the time". I feel like a complete moron for actually believing some of that. If I get lucky.....maybe once a week for an hour tops is the time i can actually see her. The quality time used to mean alot to me and I just couldn't get enough of being with her, but im tired of waiting around for when its most convienient for her. I've decided not to call her anymore. Before, there would also have to be a reason for me calling her...wierd isnt it? It hurts but im pulling through... i REALLY like this qoute and it means alot to me with its accuracy "if someone leaves you and you complain about it, your the better person". Its so true man. If she wanted to be with me, she would try, but obviously she didnt so that leaves me the one to be like "well why?". Like i said, im through with her. It would be tremendous to be with her in the future...when she settles down a little more and moves away from the party scene a little more. i Do love her but i feel my love has gone to the wrong person, shes wild and cant handle a b/f for a good distance of time. its just the thing that gets me is that when we're loving and caring at times she would say "you're going to be with me for a LONG time" and it turns out a LONG time is right around 2 -3 months. LOL. Girls are crazy. Thanks for listening to me guys, i appreciate it Link to post Share on other sites
guy_in_pain Posted July 3, 2004 Share Posted July 3, 2004 This is the story of many people out here. It happened to me about two weeks back when i found that my girlfriend of 2 years could not handle the distance and went out with some guy to whom she was badly attracted and did the kissing and all that stuff.........but she told me about it a week later and broke up without any reason.................now she keeps calling and i do answer her calls but i am not sure as to what should i do............its a messy world for guys...........you start imagining things which hurt...i mean how to take that the lips which were locked with you once would be now being enjoyed by someone else...you just feel like doing extreme things....but can't help.............you just need to let it go...........i mean seriously i entertain her thinking that she will be back but is she worth it??no she is not it is just that we are so attached that we hope it would work out but things might later repeat themselves.................and the pain is not worth it..............i never realized that there could be girls whom you could worship ( i literally worshipped this girl) and she made me go through hell..............and then i realize that there are some girls who translate themselves into WHORES.......................you can't sacrifice a beautiful life which god has given you for a whore........forget it man.....................Next time if she calls just tell her " that the decision to not be together was hers and now if at all you are getting back together then the decision will be yours"..............Be a Man..............its hard to be one when the pain overpowers you but you are after all a man whom God created to endure all hardships.......May God bless all of us cheated upon males................. Link to post Share on other sites
eldslover Posted July 3, 2004 Share Posted July 3, 2004 Danny, wow i couldn't believe how similar ur situation is to mine. she would tell me the same exact things, being together for a long time, going out dancing. she never went out dancing while we were together though. and i its a huge task to try and be friends. me and my ex have been trying but we have ended up actually sleeping together as recent as last week. it also makes me think about what you said, that she is only trying to be friends so as to not feel bad. me and my ex were good friends before we got together and we promised each other we would remain friends after our relationship. she knew and i knew we weren't super serious you know? she calls me usually once a day but i NEVER, EVER call her. no matter what i have yet to dial her number unless we are actually going to do something and im picking her up i will call her but otherwise i absolutely refuse to call, even though all day i think about her and wish and wish and wish i could call her. and the days that we dont speak, i miss her dumb crazy.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author danny8630 Posted July 4, 2004 Author Share Posted July 4, 2004 yeah guys... its tough Im doing better though as the days progress...im actually looking forward to seeing posts from you guys instead of wanting her to call me!lol. to guy in pain: she didnt cheat on me. we've been broken up for a little over a month; maybe she has kissed someone or whatever and it does hurt to think about it how she used to be mine. In my last post, i noted that no one had called each other that day. Well she called me today 7/3 at about 3:30pm to tell me that she had just woke up from the previous night of "partying/dancing". Its something i could really care less about. She knows that kind of stuff irritates me so she says it anyway. However........there was no overall point to her calling me. I could've been an ass and said "so why did you call me" like she does to me but i didnt. Instead, i tried to see when we were going to hang out and she comes back with "we just went to the movies tuesday"(and i think today is....Saturday??)...Ahh, why chase a girl that doesnt want to even hang out with you? Its so reassuring knowing that someone else is going through what I am. BUT The reason for why things are the way they are is because of me. It was me who couldnt get enough of seeing her...talking to her...calling her....the list goes on. I now know to separate myself and give SPACE. I think space is probably a very important thing. It just erks me the most thinking about how much she liked/loved her ex that treated her like **** and cheated on her. Why cant I have that much more DESERVED love than that prick who did that to her? Link to post Share on other sites
eldslover Posted July 4, 2004 Share Posted July 4, 2004 yo just tell her. if she cant be a friend that you can hang out with, than forget about being friends. see what she says. calling you to tell you she just woke up from watever is just to make you jealous and make you mad, i would have been like ya thats great goodbye. i still cant get enough of my ex when we do hang out and it hurts when she could care less about doing anything with me. but in our relationship it was both of us who made the effort to see each other whenever possible, for just over a year we lasted we were constantly together, and it always amazed me how i could really never get enough. but you said it yourself, 'why chase a girl that doesnt want to even hang out with you?' Link to post Share on other sites
Author danny8630 Posted July 4, 2004 Author Share Posted July 4, 2004 yeah dude, you said it too. Shes such a bullsh*ter though man. She like promised me and told me that "yeah, we will hang out when im not working, at school, or sleeping". i was about to be like "yah, thats like never". i'm just weak about talking on the phone, i word stuff all messed up and like i just break down. I'm not an assh*ole to girls and damn i wish it wouldnt backfire on me Do you have AIM or AOL? Link to post Share on other sites
eldslover Posted July 4, 2004 Share Posted July 4, 2004 ya my sn is: thedevilnaked Link to post Share on other sites
eldslover Posted July 4, 2004 Share Posted July 4, 2004 danny, hey sorry my aunt called me i was on the fone. thats stinks working 4th of july! at least its during the day i hope. good luck at work, and if no posts happy FOURTH OF JULYY!!!!!!! hope to catch up again. Link to post Share on other sites
beautiful Posted July 4, 2004 Share Posted July 4, 2004 Danny.................what is it that you so desperately miss about her? is the fact that she left you? that she is playing games with your heart and mind? or is it the fact that she does not want to be with you?...............wow those are very loveable things you seem to miss about her! I am being sarcastic on purpose here to make a point! First of all, no one on this earth can make you do or feel anything unless you chose to give them this power over you! You in control of you ONLY! True love and respect comes from within ourselves. If you do not have that, you can't have a healthy relationship with anyone. A person that truly loves you will not and I repeat, will not give you such drama. Learn to love yourself, respect yourself and learn to be greatful to what your blessing are in life already. Count them each day and move on happily! Believe me when I say that being so desperate for her or anyone in your life is not a sign of a healthy man. Love is a learned behavior............................just as you fell in love..you can fall out of love with her if you chose to! Remember it is all about making choices in life. One other thing, stop talking about "her". The more you do the longer it will take you to get over this and to keep your self pain going. Go out there and do things. Make new friends, start a hobby, go to church do whatever you like..................to be sincerly busy and happy. There are so many wonderful gurls out there......................................just waiting to be swept away. Why waste your precious time on someone that is playing around. Huggz P.S. When you make changes in your life for you........................wonderful things can happen! Link to post Share on other sites
Author danny8630 Posted July 5, 2004 Author Share Posted July 5, 2004 Thanks alot beautiful... You're absolutely right. I have made the decision in my mind to move on recently. And it has helped. She called me today and said that "we havent talked in a long time". so i asked her what was going on and ended up cutting the conversation off short because it just seemed right to. I havent called her unless she had called me, im just done with her. I've listened to these posts, my friends, and my family and they have all suggested to move on. I have been almost as happy as i was a few months ago and im thrilled about it. I still do love her even though she practiced high school games with me. She was/is my first love and sadly no one can replace a first. Thanks for your info. I have looked at things from an outside perspective and have realized that something isnt right with us. I have thought and moved on about it. she just isnt the one. ps. thanks for the info, keep posting! Link to post Share on other sites
sami Posted July 5, 2004 Share Posted July 5, 2004 As long as you are physically,mentally and emotionally fit you still have many chances. Try to be bring yourself together and go out fishing. do not stay home and cry. You will only hurt yourself and burn it out. No one will take when you do that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author danny8630 Posted July 5, 2004 Author Share Posted July 5, 2004 Thanks Sami, i can go fishing all the time and do many fun things. I'm not sure if including her would be a good idea though... Well I told her she was lucky that I didnt use the "so why did you call" thing she does to me. She says "oh my god, thats so F'd up" and then i told her she did it to me like 3 times! She says i would call say whats up and then there would be an "akward silence", she says. Anyway, im having surgery friday...ossicular reconstruction or prosthetic hearing bone(s). She says she wants to see me and stuff while im home. She'll probably stop by for a few minutes then call me 2 weeks later or something. i dont know. Link to post Share on other sites
sami Posted July 5, 2004 Share Posted July 5, 2004 Don't wait,expect or assume. That is torture at it's best. Go out and forget about her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author danny8630 Posted July 5, 2004 Author Share Posted July 5, 2004 I have already done all three of those things and thats why im where im at right now. I expected her call daily, i assumed she knew where and what i was doing. I don't anymore do any of those...she knows i work mondays, saturdays, and sundays...but do i? 2 weeks ago, i was rescheduled to work on fridays instead of mondays. she doesnt know. That is how much i've changed about stuff. If she comes to my house while im down...cool. If not, so be it; I dont think it will affect me at all really, it just shows her true character. Link to post Share on other sites
8675309eeyine Posted July 6, 2004 Share Posted July 6, 2004 Hi danny8630! Dude, this girl sounds like SUCH a needy little so-and-so. It makes her feel like a hot shot to make someone pine after her like this.. Well, it certainly sounds like you're not letting her bullshi*t get to you anymore. Well done!!! Seriously, though.. someone in this post said it and was right.. Someone who truly loves you would NOT torture you like this. They would want to leave you alone to heal.. they would want to see you happy. They wouldn't say "so why are you calling me".. She knows d*mn well why you're calling.. Anyway, it's GREAT to know you're feeling better. It will take time. Someday, someday in the not so distant future, come back and read what you wrote. You'll be amazed at how your feelings will have changed.. You'll be SO over this girl by then, and probably in love with some other nice girl who treats you a million times better than this one ever did. Keep us posted! jenny Link to post Share on other sites
Author danny8630 Posted July 6, 2004 Author Share Posted July 6, 2004 Thank you Jenny for your support! I can safely say im doing alot better. Now i feel bad returning her missed phone calls, feels like im making a mistake calling back. She's so strong about this, like even if i tried to make her feel bad, i couldnt because everytime i say im busy and can't hang out with her, theres no disappointment in her tone, none at all, instead she'll have an enthusiastic "Okay, Ill just see ya later then" I have urges to call her but i can contain them now. I am doing alot better and i want to thank everyone for their support. Link to post Share on other sites
sami Posted July 6, 2004 Share Posted July 6, 2004 That is good for you. Keep going and you will eventually be fine and clear. Your system started to clear up. Just follow up through and don't stop the process. It will soon be over. No regrets my friend. I have been there before. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Author danny8630 Posted July 6, 2004 Author Share Posted July 6, 2004 hey guys... i was thinking about it just now and probably sooner or later she is going to call me/ ask me why "i dont call her anymore". Should i tell her that im giving her her space or... i have NO idea on what to say...if you've been reading the following posts, maybe someone tell me what a good move to say is.. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts