Does my girlfriend like another guy?

[mufc]

I have been with my girlfriend for over 3 years and it has been a decent relationship, we met in high school and we are both 20. However lately I have been worried that she might like another guy.The guy is her classmate , part of her social circle and they are doing a school project together.

The other day I went to a party with my girlfriend and the guy was at the party and he constantly hit on my girlfriend.

The first thing that bothered me is how much my girlfriend laughed at his jokes. A lot of people laughed at his jokes but my girlfriend was laughing was by far the person that laughed the most and she seemed to know a lot of stuff about the guy. The guy would constantly playfully hit my girlfriend and she didnt seem uncofortable at all, the other thing that bothered me is that she played with her hair when she was around the guy.

Finally to make matters worse when I was sitting with my arms around her she was with her legs extended touching the guy legs.

 

My girlfriend has a lot of male friend and she is usually keen on physical demostration like hugging them or whatever but this was different because they were no hugs here but just some playful touching from the guy. I dont know if I should confront my girlfriend because I dont want to look overly jealous but Im definetly worried. She does say she loves me but this is still bothersome.

[betterdeal]

Hi there. It sounds like you are quite upset by this and I can understand where you are coming from. It might be an idea to discuss how you feel with your girlfriend and what has made you feel that way. Something along the lines of how you feel unsure, jealous, upset (you describe it your way) because of the way she gets on with that other guy.

 

Rather than try to work out how she feels about that guy, discuss what you do know, which is how you feel, and with a pinch of luck, she'll come to understand your point of view from that.

[mtber75]

You should confront her about it. It is a legit reason. Its all about honesty! It just might be that she's just flirting with this guy nothing beyond that. Than you should step up your game with her because she might be missing something from your relationship.

[Reddice]

Talking won't help if she's already attracted to the other guy. She will just plain deny it. This makes it impossible to know if she's telling the truth or not. Also, it will push her more in his direction and will give her more reason to break up with you. You will be considered too jealous, too insecure, too immature, etc etc etc. The other guy will start looking better and better. If I were in your shoes, I would seriously consider breaking up with her. Your gut feeling is telling you something's wrong and believe me... your gut feeling is always right.

[CC12]

Honestly, it's a little crazy that you have a problem with her laughing at someone's jokes too much. And that she happened to be playing with her hair while talking to him. Those things are just...such silly things for you to get riled up over.

 

Now, the playful hitting and touching their legs together is worrisome, but keeping in mind that you overreacted to her laughing and hair-playing, maybe you're overreacting to all of it. I mean, you were already seething that she found him humorous, and I can see how after that you felt that any of their exchange was terrible and inappropriate.

 

Talk to her about it. Don't "confront," just talk about it calmly and tell her how you feel about her "physical demonstrations" with other men. These demonstrations obviously make you uncomfortable. Let her know this and see what she offers as a solution.

[nofool4u]

I'd say this isn't the girl for you. Blatant disrespect right in front of you.

 

Talk to her and tell her you don't like what you are seeing and that you know when another guy is hitting on your gf and when said gf is reciprocating.

 

If she gets mad, defensive, or tells you that you are being stupid, then tell her its over.

[Leigh 87]

I would not want my boyfriend laughing loudly at a girls jokes ( funny people are very attractive in my opinion!) and then to touch her in any way later on!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

 

Like wise, my boyfriend would not want me touching legs with a guy I had laughed at a lot, and he certainly would NOT BE OKAY WITH ANOTHER GUY REPEATEDLY HITTING ON ME.

 

He hit on your girlfriend - You should have told him, calmly, taken him aside and said " look, I like my girlfriend a lot and I really do not think it is appropriate of you to flirt with her".

YOU ma get called an idiot and the guy will probably go telling all his buddies that your an insecure pr*ck, and it could very well backfire. Young men are SO immature. He may even hit on her more. ..................... oops, actually, forget that advice..

 

Hmm, so yeah, I would not confront him, leave that to the bigger boys in their mid to late 20's - who will flat out not care what their collage peers think of them - my boyfriend would flat out tell a guy to **** off if he kept hitting on me.

 

I would tell her, however, that if she hangs out with guys who keep hitting on her, she is either stupid for not realizing the guy meant business with her, or she is inconsiderate of your feelings!

Tell her that you deserve a girl who is into you, and does not let guys continually flirt with her.

[Chi townD]

If your gut i telling you something is wrong, then always go with your gut. You need to talk to her. Find out what the deal is and have her see it from your point of view.

 

Personally, if a guy was doing that to my girl at a party I would have been like, "HAHAHA!! That was funny dude! By the way, you touch my girl again and I'm gonna touch you back. And you aern't going to like it."

[Snakechammah]

If your gut i telling you something is wrong, then always go with your gut. You need to talk to her. Find out what the deal is and have her see it from your point of view.

 

Personally, if a guy was doing that to my girl at a party I would have been like, "HAHAHA!! That was funny dude! By the way, you touch my girl again and I'm gonna touch you back. And you aern't going to like it."

 

somehow I misread this as...

... I would have been like, "HAHAHA!! That was funny dude! By the way, you touch my girl again and I'm gonna touch your butt. And you aren't going to like it."

 

It's funny either way.

[mufc]

This episode happened last Friday and I didnt say anything after that so I think its better to let it go for now and confront her only if she does it again.

[Leigh 87]

This episode happened last Friday and I didnt say anything after that so I think its better to let it go for now and confront her only if she does it again.

 

 

 

Your being a total pushover. A door mat.

 

You let your girl flirt with other guys, and feed her ego with their attetion:sick:

 

Then, she LET this guy hit on her.

 

Listen, mate - I would not stay AROUND a guy who was very clearly hitting on me.

 

I have a boyfriend.

 

I care about my bf's feelings more than a guy who hits on me and feeds my ego for a second.

 

IF your girlfriend cared very much about you, she would have told you about this guy.

 

You are letting girls walk all over you and disrespect you.

 

grow a pair of balls and walk away.

 

Don't accept a girl who is not that into you.

 

Or, if she is into you, she is naive and stupid in relationships. And she needs to learn the basic rules. About how to respect her boyfriend.

[betterdeal]

This episode happened last Friday and I didnt say anything after that so I think its better to let it go for now and confront her only if she does it again.

 

If it happens again, and you want to confront her about it, it would do you good to not jump to conclusions too soon. Finding other people funny, engaging, entertaining, attractive even is pretty natural. The key thing in a relationship is to talk to one another and if something bugs you, say so.

 

I'll give you an example: A friend of mine was still very fond of his ex from years ago and we were all a big group of friends who'd meet up a couple of times a year. The woman acquired a new boyfriend and the next time we all met up my friend hugged her and was very affectionate. This annoyed her boyfriend, who brought it up with her afterwards. She then made it clear to my friend that being that affectionate was not cool. She chose her boyfriend in that scenario.

 

I'm not saying that will happen if you raise the issue, but you will have done what you can to steer things back your way. Stick to the facts, be honest with yourself and don't be afraid to express your feelings in words.