A 37 year old woman likes me, but it's impossible because I am only 16

[adeanw1088]

Last year for summer vacation I left the States for two months to visit my father. During these two months, I met a friend of my dad's, a lady named Sofia. She is 37 years old, divorced I believe (I don't ask for personal details), has a 11 year old daughter, and has been single for quite some time. Even though she is 37, she is extremely attractive. She is very pretty and you can't tell that she's 37. However, we were not very close at all last year, in fact, I don't even think you could consider us friends. She would just accompany my dad and I out for dinner, go out with us sometimes, etc., etc. She kept complimenting me last year on how cute/handsome/attractive I am for my age. She couldn't believe that I was only 15 when she met me for the first time last year. She said she kept thinking I was at least 18 years old. Not to sound conceited, I am just retelling the facts. Then during the last day of my stay, she accompanied me the entire day. During the final hour at my dad's house, she told me that if she were a few years younger she would definitely love me.

 

This year has passed much differently however. Everywhere we go now, we hold hands, she wraps her arm around mine like a couple, she rests her head on my shoulders, we hug, I put my arms around her neck, and we touch each other, not sexually, but like I would touch her hair, she would touch my biceps, etc., etc. Also, she has told me various times this year that she likes me, at least 5 times now that I think about it. However, one time she did tell me when we were having a conversation that it would be impossible for us to be bf/gf and I completely agree because of the age difference.

 

We joke and talk about a lot of things. She teaches me about girls, dating, and sex. We have gone out quite a few times this year and I know we both have lots of fun. She has been trying to get me set up with a girlfriend right now, but at the same time, we still hold hands everywhere we go, etc. We also made a pact that we would stay good friends until the day we die. However, she kept asking me what I felt we were before. I said "just OK friends."

 

I also get this feeling when I'm out with her like the feeling you get when you feel that a girl likes you but you aren't 100% sure. She tries to act like we're nothing although I feel she really wants us to be closer. For example, when she brought her daughter out with her one time, her daughter told her that it was disgusting for her to hold my hand because the way we held hands, it looked like we were bf/gf. Sofia just laughed and said that's impossible, although the way she said it made me doubt her.

 

I don't understand if she is just toying around with me or if she actually likes me. I understand that it's impossible for us to be bf/gf and I completely accept that, but I just feel it's kinda weird what's going on between us two.

[soapoperahaven]

you should totally not even be more than friends. she is way too old if someone found out she could get into major trouble and if you think you care for her at all then that should be the first priorityl. if she really likes you and you like her then what is 2 more years of waiting you can remain freinds and that should be all until you are of age otherwise he life could be ruined and maybe yours too

[truthsayer]

What kind of 37 year old develops an emotional attachment for a 16 year old? Sorry hon, but you're still a kid. Adults should be attracted to adults, and because she's not I suspect all inside her headspace is not quite right.

[guest]

I had a 35 year old married lady come on to me back when I was 17...

 

I had a girlfriend I had been seeing for over a year at the time too. This lady and I worked in the same restaurant. She was a server, I a cook. One night while closing up, she and I were the last remaining two there. I attempted to pass by her to go into the other room for something. She refused to move, then push me up against the doorway and kissed me (attempted french kiss) She also said she hadn't been that hot since she'd met her husband.

 

I pushed her off then pretended nothing had happened to finish up as we were nearly finished up anyway. (I guess I was in shock) Yes, she was attractive looking too.

 

I felt very awkward the following day. I wound up quitting that job a few days later. I told my folks what happened, they kinda made light of it...I guess thinking it was cute or even made up???

 

Wonder what S*** would have hit the fan if it was the other way around in terms of age etc.???

[Olivia_19742004]

A sixteen year old did not type this. I've heard and seen how they use English.

[sami]

What is going on in here today ? Are we reading real posts or fiction?

[adeanw1088]

Actually I lied: I am only 15 at the moment, I turn 16 in a few months.

 

Also, you people are grossly overreacting. We haven't even KISSED yet, we haven't even PASSIONATELY HUGGED YET. Some of you are even thinking about sex? We're not even close to that. And by the looks of it, we'll never be bf/gf. I guess my first post was too serious, we're just good friends right now. It's just that Sofia DOES like me in a boy/girl sort of way but that is all.

 

I posted this because it has been on my mind for awhile and I wanted to share it. But everyone is overreacting.

[faux]

Originally posted by Olivia_19742004

A sixteen year old did not type this. I've heard and seen how they use English.

 

There is no proof, however, that the poster is over the age of 16. In fact, he stated that he is actually younger than he previously mentioned. It would be wrong for any of us to, at this point in time, discredit his situation simply because we SUSPECT something. One can never tell another's age simply by use of language.

 

When my mother composes emails to me, she writes as though she were a typical 15 year-old in a chat room, which is quite embarrassing. There are a few other young posters who contribute to these forums, and their use of language and mechanics is perfectly fine, if you ask me.

 

Getting back to the main topic thread, however:

 

If this Sofia woman is attracted to you at such a young age, there is most likely something shady about her character. If she ever were to kiss you, before you turned 18, she would in most places be committing a felony. I recommend keeping it as "just friends", which means cutting out the hugging and hand-holding. You state that she has an 11 year-old daughter. You are four years older than her daughter. How would she feel about your father hugging and hanging out with her daughter?

 

Simply put, I recommend distancing yourself a bit more. I had many older friends when I was your age, and they were, as yours is, friends and acquaintances of the family. I do not think that the hand-holding and hugging is such a good idea. Additionally, the things that this Sofia has said, according to you, are huge red flags.

[moimeme]

Also, you people are grossly overreacting. We haven't even KISSED yet

 

You said she had tried to French kiss you. This is not friendship, bud.

 

A sixteen year old did not type this. I've heard and seen how they use English

 

We have a younger member who blows the doors off most adults in terms of vocabulary and grammar. Don't be so hasty to generalize.

[adeanw1088]

moimeme, after reading and rereading my first post I don't understand how you can come up with the generalization/inference that she was trying to french kiss me. the farthest we have gone IMO is her putting her head on my shoulders while watching a movie at the theaters.

 

faux, I appreciate your response. that was what I was thinking too. thanks.

 

for those of you who don't believe that I am only 15, as I already said in my first post, sofia couldn't believe that I was only 14 (I lied again) when we first met. I dunno, but most people say I am too mature for my age.

[sami]

If you are mature as you are telling us just stay away. That is not good for either of you.

[Olivia_19742004]

We have a younger member who blows the doors off most adults in terms of vocabulary and grammar. Don't be so hasty to generalize.

 

I think this is bogus but that's just my opinion. Like everyone else I have a right to it and I don't think a sixteen year old wrote this.

 

I'm not just referring to the vocabulary and grammar. I'm also referring to phrases that are used.

[HokeyReligions]

Generally speaking -- women reach their peak sexually in their 30's. I've known a few women (pre- and post- menopause) whose romantic and sexual appetites would make a typical 17 y/o hormone driven boy blush!

 

At first I thought that perhaps this woman was cozying up to you in an effort to get closer to your dad, but now I'm thinking that maybe she is just not clicking along on all cylinders. This is inappropriate attention and contact. Put a stop to it.

 

Its great that you feel you have a friend, but you need to talk to your dad about this and get his input and guidance. It's certainly does not sound healthy.

[Dee Dee]

Hey Adeanw1088,

 

Keep the memories, but MOVE on to YOUR age group. Trouble will be plentiful if not. She knows better and I sense that you do too.

[PoliticallyIncor]

Want some advice from a 24 year old man who is not bs'ing you and giving you the full info?

 

You have two options.

 

1. Stay away from her emotionally. This is the probably the major reason she is attracted to you. In your young years (especially puberty) you are much more open emotionally and women get verry turned on by this. Women your age are not so interested in you becuase they look up the ladder. (verry dumb but socially supported) However women past their prime (30's) start to tingle and want to have sex. And if the sex is with an emotionaly untouched and verry open stunningly gorgeous young MAN (cause you are fully functional) that can give untouched open emotional passion all the better twice the pleasure. Especially if he is from out of the country and only in for a short period of time. The only thing is you can and most probably will get emotionaly involved and this can f... you up big time. It will be your first heart break etc. In the worst case she is a manipulator and is doing this intentionally to you as her own little mind game. But from the info your giving I would say she is just lost in her romantic ideas of when she was a teenager herself.

 

2. Have sex with her (the moment you turn 18 or if its legal in the country your at right now). If you do ,you will be in for a treat. (personal experiences) As you can see by my name i'm not verry scrupulous. Only choose this option if you are strong enough emotionally and have you're priorities and thougts clearly set on sex. If your not then don't do it. Especially not on the basis of feelings of love cause the relationship will never work.

 

That's the situation my man.

 

Go and do what feels right to you and don't let anyone sway you from that. (unless it's your parents advice)

[tiki]

Originally posted by moimeme

 

You said she had tried to French kiss you.

 

moi - the guest said that about the french kiss, not the original poster.

 

 

Stay away from this lady. Something is screaming loudly that she has issues. I wouldn't hold her hand either - that's symbolic of a relationship.

[adeanw1088]

thanks for all the comments

 

the amusing thing is.. right after I posted this topic.. she left the city for three days to visit her parents and when she returned, she accompanied my dad and I out for dinner. during dinner, she was extremely awkward and finally she told me that her daughter told her to stop being so "close" with me, but she was definitely not very happy that night. hope we can at least stay friends however

 

as for the people who still do not grasp the fact that I am fifteen years old, if I WASN'T fifteen, something would have already happened between sofia and I... do not judge a book by its cover =/

[sami]

that is fine . Just stay friends from afar. It makes no big diffrence whether you are only 15 or 17. The idea is : you are still young for that and tooooo young for her.

[d.stevens]

Wouldn't it be something if by chance she stumbled across your post lol.

[engravefeelthevoid]

look ur dad is just telling her to do this so you would be more familiar with women and girls.

 

trust me

[dyermaker]

Her relationship with you is totally inappropriate, you should sever all ties with her completely. It would be one thing if you could remain friends, but it looks to me like friendship is the vehicle of her manipulation, it's sort of her leverage on you.