Well I was wrong.

[AlexanderJames]

I know I said I wasnt going to start any more threads because I was back on track but things changed ><

I dont want to bug my close mates with more of my problems so I'm just going to vent on here. Any advice or opinion is appreciated though

 

Not too long ago I had been pretty happy with the way things where going. I'd pretty much convinced myself I was on easy street but the world must just sit and wait to hear people say they're happy with life so it can step in and say "We'll see about that".

 

Then I recieved a letter in the mail about the changes to the lease on the place we lived. I'd asked to get her name off. Awkwardly enough the time I did break NC a few days before was because my ex wanted to know if I had taken her name off, I said I had. But then I had to call her up and tell her I needed her signature /: So she got a bit narky and started calling me a liar and irresponsible and stuff. But I just took it all on the chin, she's been through a lot so I didnt take the hostility personally, and arranged for her to come sign them that night. As many of you probably know she also made a pretty big deal about wanting to see my dog. So I told her I was going to go out and that she could spend as much time with my dog as she wanted to.

 

There was a bit of small talk between the arangement and her actually coming round. Mostly pointless stuff, I made a point to tell her that the first note she left on my doorstep was a bit immature. And she said she knows it was silly and felt bad afterwards, and that I had just caught her on a bad day. All of the negative things I've posted on here that she's done she seemed to apologise to me about directly or indirectly.. She even said she deeply regretted mentioning the 3some she had over dinner the second she said it.

 

Anyway she came over at 5:00pm, I was leaving at 5:30. She got to the door and I let her in, I said hey but thats it. She was saying hi to my dog so she didnt pay much attention to me. I figured that was how it was going to be the whole time she was around me so.. I lead her in and got the papers for her to sign. She asked me where she needed to sign them, I pointed and then walked off into my housemates room. My dog followed me ><.. I wasnt being standoffish but I wasnt being particularly accommodating either. She came into the bedroom with me, king (my dog) and my housemate and started playing with king. I asked my house mate "What are you up to tonight?" and he replied nothing you?. I said to him "Me, ____ and ____ are going to play pool if you wanna come." It was two girls that my ex knew that I had mentioned. I then said to my ex that there was loads of toys out the back that she can grab if she wants to play with king. Basically as soon as I said this she grabbed her stuff and said to my housemate really quickly "I have to go bye" and left. She was at my house for all of about 6 minutes. Even though she had a go at me the week before about not being comfortable with her coming over to spend time with my dog.

 

Since then she's opened up to me more than ever before. She was always very emotionally independant and didnt like talking about her feelings much. But I asked her why she left in such a hurry and she said things like, shes so lost, she doesnt know, and that shes an emotion wreck. That was about all of it for the opening up. The short convo that followed just involved pointless chit chat and her occasionally taking a dig at me by bringing up things Id done in the past that hurt her. Which again I didnt let bother me because she had made it obvious she was still hurting over me.

 

Outside opinion has said that they think she still has feelings for me, and that she wants me to fight for her. And that she's confused and needs space. They also think she's using my dog as an excuse to see me, in hopes we might talk. They think that the reason she left so quickly is because she was hoping for me to initiate a conversation with her, because she wanted to talk but didnt know how. Or that hearing I was going out with a couple of girls hurt her. But I've spoken to her a few times since and she has reassured me that she doesnt love me, doesnt want a relationship, doesnt think about men and genuinely only wants to come over to see my dog? Do you think she's just got walls up and is just putting on a brave face? Or do you think everyone else is mistaken and she really only wants to see my dog?

[AlexanderJames]

Trying to keep it short but its impossible when I'm venting..

 

Another thing that has happened since is I decided to pretty much set up a make or break situation. I had been talking to and seeing a girl a bit recently who was very interested in me. So I told my ex this. I said she's making lots of effort to get to know me. I made sure I told her I still loved her and that everything I said in the past was true. And that the door WAS still open for her even though I wasnt waiting. But that I was going to do what was in my best interest. I told her that if she wants to talk to me about anything that she just has to ask. And that she might be close to losing me forever.

 

She responded to this with "Do whats best for you, live your life, dont let me hold you back"

 

I havent made any attempts to contact her since. But she has been messaging me here and there. Little things. Like last night she sent me a message out of the blue saying "Have you sold your cars yet?" Cause she knew I had a couple on the market.

I didnt ignore them I just replied bluntly with I sold one and im keeping the other. and she replied Oh hey good for you. I thanked her and suggested she come and see my dog soon. I dont know why but? I guess I want to see her too....

And she said she wants to come see him tomorrow.

 

Womans perspective? Seeing as men can never seem to understand womans hints and the way they think. Where do you think she stands? Still confused and unsure about us? Possibly scared to get hurt again?

Or legit over me and just wants to see my dog and make small talk for no reason?

[AlexanderJames]

I just dont understand how a female friend of mine could get the idea that my ex wants me to fight for her, when my ex is telling me that she doesnt love me and doesnt want me? Surely this cant be how females hint that they want to be fought for? By suggesting that the dont want to be fought for? Because That seems insane to me if its the case? Ormaybe she actually wants to be fought for but at the same time doesn't want to let me in for fear of being hurt again? Like she's struggling with her own feelings whether or not she wants me fight for her or not?

 

ORRRR is saying not to fight for her, In hopes that I STILL fight for her and show her than despite her not wanting it I am still going to fight. Like proving my love or whatever? Ugh! I dont know... /:

 

Thats my vent done.

[AlexanderJames]

I bought him about 5 weeks before we broke up. She wasn't around him very long. Didn't buy him together. I bought him before we moved in together.

 

It's a long story if you haven't been following on here >< but long story short I dumped her 6 months ago for no reason other than being scared we were moving too fast. 3 months of little to no contact. Then 3 months of catching up, intimate stuff, people assumed we were back on then when it came to discussing it she said there was no feelings and that we were never getting back together and that she just had sex with me cause she had needs and it was easy. I just took it as her trying to get back at me. Like leading me on to hurt me back. Which is really how it looked if you read the whole story.But she's later admitted to being confused and that's why..

[whoknows11]

I know I said I wasnt going to start any more threads because I was back on track but things changed ><

I dont want to bug my close mates with more of my problems so I'm just going to vent on here. Any advice or opinion is appreciated though

 

Not too long ago I had been pretty happy with the way things where going. I'd pretty much convinced myself I was on easy street but the world must just sit and wait to hear people say they're happy with life so it can step in and say "We'll see about that".

 

Then I recieved a letter in the mail about the changes to the lease on the place we lived. I'd asked to get her name off. Awkwardly enough the time I did break NC a few days before was because my ex wanted to know if I had taken her name off, I said I had. But then I had to call her up and tell her I needed her signature /: So she got a bit narky and started calling me a liar and irresponsible and stuff. But I just took it all on the chin, she's been through a lot so I didnt take the hostility personally, and arranged for her to come sign them that night. As many of you probably know she also made a pretty big deal about wanting to see my dog. So I told her I was going to go out and that she could spend as much time with my dog as she wanted to.

 

There was a bit of small talk between the arangement and her actually coming round. Mostly pointless stuff, I made a point to tell her that the first note she left on my doorstep was a bit immature. And she said she knows it was silly and felt bad afterwards, and that I had just caught her on a bad day. All of the negative things I've posted on here that she's done she seemed to apologise to me about directly or indirectly.. She even said she deeply regretted mentioning the 3some she had over dinner the second she said it.

 

Anyway she came over at 5:00pm, I was leaving at 5:30. She got to the door and I let her in, I said hey but thats it. She was saying hi to my dog so she didnt pay much attention to me. I figured that was how it was going to be the whole time she was around me so.. I lead her in and got the papers for her to sign. She asked me where she needed to sign them, I pointed and then walked off into my housemates room. My dog followed me ><.. I wasnt being standoffish but I wasnt being particularly accommodating either. She came into the bedroom with me, king (my dog) and my housemate and started playing with king. I asked my house mate "What are you up to tonight?" and he replied nothing you?. I said to him "Me, ____ and ____ are going to play pool if you wanna come." It was two girls that my ex knew that I had mentioned. I then said to my ex that there was loads of toys out the back that she can grab if she wants to play with king. Basically as soon as I said this she grabbed her stuff and said to my housemate really quickly "I have to go bye" and left. She was at my house for all of about 6 minutes. Even though she had a go at me the week before about not being comfortable with her coming over to spend time with my dog.

 

Since then she's opened up to me more than ever before. She was always very emotionally independant and didnt like talking about her feelings much. But I asked her why she left in such a hurry and she said things like, shes so lost, she doesnt know, and that shes an emotion wreck. That was about all of it for the opening up. The short convo that followed just involved pointless chit chat and her occasionally taking a dig at me by bringing up things Id done in the past that hurt her. Which again I didnt let bother me because she had made it obvious she was still hurting over me.

 

Outside opinion has said that they think she still has feelings for me, and that she wants me to fight for her. And that she's confused and needs space. They also think she's using my dog as an excuse to see me, in hopes we might talk. They think that the reason she left so quickly is because she was hoping for me to initiate a conversation with her, because she wanted to talk but didnt know how. Or that hearing I was going out with a couple of girls hurt her. But I've spoken to her a few times since and she has reassured me that she doesnt love me, doesnt want a relationship, doesnt think about men and genuinely only wants to come over to see my dog? Do you think she's just got walls up and is just putting on a brave face? Or do you think everyone else is mistaken and she really only wants to see my dog?

 

Its always good to see you on here man. I read your threads in hope i can get help on my situation. But the thing is, im no expert but it seems she isnt over you. It isnt about your dog, shes just making it seem to you like she could care less about you. But its clear she does. She wouldnt of said she had to go so quick after you mentioned it. Shes been talking to you more frequent and even put a note on your door reguardless of what it was. Reading your stories, its a clear cut sign she isnt over you. Her feelings are starting to resurface and shes becoming emotional again when it comes to you. She still really cares. These texts,wanting to see the dog,etc are just so she can here from you. She must miss you. If she didnt you two wouldnt of bothered to argue at all after breakup. Shed want nothing to do with you. Idk its just what i see.

[Ruby65]

My opinion totally disagrees with above.

 

I think this is all just her way of having you around as a back burner option and to hold her hand while she transitions to life without you.

 

Breadcrumbs.

 

Please stop torturing yourself! She's had opportunities to say she wants you back..... and she just doesn't, she tells you the opposite.

 

Go back to NC and let yourself heal and get over this girl! I've had exes drag me on for MONTHS..... they just enjoy the attention and the emotional involvement.... they enjoying knowing you care about what they say and do.

 

You don't deserve to be toyed with. As soon as she meets another guy, she'll have no trouble dropping you and suddenly forget all about wanting to see your dog ever again!

[Zammo25]

Me and my ex split last Xmas but saw each other a few times as " friends " until 3 months ago when I stop that as I told her I still loved he and could not just be " friends " anymore. I blew the relationship and hate myself for this. We e mailed a few times and again I told her how I felt but I never got anything back emotionally just a few crumbs. I could have worked at " friends " and tried to get her heart back and regret not doing that now. This week I have found she is seeing someone else and told me through a friend to never contact her again.

[RogerWallace111]

Hey there again AJ. My guess would be that it's a combination of what Ruby & whoknows are suggesting. Those scenarios don't necessarily contradict eachother in all ways. I would imagine that she is serious in saying she doesn't want to get back together, etc, and wouldn't even if you tried to "fight for her". But, she likely has some lingering feelings and would like to see you fight for her. Could be because your independence and contact with other girls are momentarily piquing her interest in her low state. Or that she just wants to feel wanted in this state, regardless of greater intentions, and needs an ego boost. Or just that seeing you show interest would allow her to see you as weak or undesirable again (which is how she wants to see you).

 

In any case, don't do any fighting. If anything just go nc again. It would appear to me to be in no way the type of "interest" that would hold promise of some revitalized, fresh start with her. She's probably just feeling down or lonely, and just playing games in seek of some sort of attention. And ****, even if it could lead to sex or hanging out, it would be brief and end up biting you in the ass again.

 

You don't need this chick, she seems to be inevitable trouble.

[Art_Critic]

But I've spoken to her a few times since and she has reassured me that she doesnt love me, doesnt want a relationship, doesnt think about men and genuinely only wants to come over to see my dog?

 

 

I know you are just venting ..

 

You should have had her go to the leasing office to sign the lease, not your place, that way you wouldn't be in this emotional place.

 

She is telling you in no uncertain terms that she doesn't wwant a relationship with you and wants to come over to see the dog, even if it hurts you..

 

Dude..

 

You really need to give this person time to miss you.

If you keep in her face she will never miss you and will be pushed further away.

 

Do I believe that she isn't interested in men at this time.. no..

Even if she isn't and is taking a breather it isn't gonna be you that she sees as dateable.

[Jono85]

dude go NC and stop being weak. u bite on EVERY one of her little breadcrumbs. did u sell the car turns into, wanna come over and see the dog?? dude. enough. does she still have lingering feelings? most likely. but she still can and probably is using you to move on until she finds a guy she wants to date. just end this already. no dog visits, nothing.

[AlexanderJames]

You guys might be right.. I'm not going to let myself get hung up or anything. I'm going to stay detached and see where it goes.

 

As no one on here understands her position at the moment I do believe her when she says she doesn't think about men. But it's not my position to divulge into her personal life so I can't explain why.

 

I said I owed her a night at the movies and she asked me to take her out. And thismorning she got in touch telling me she got herself a sports car and asked if I wanted to come out for a drive and see what it's like (I race cars as a hobby). So she's trying to spend time with me through MY interests?

 

Thanks for all the opinions guys.

[Jono85]

You guys might be right.. I'm not going to let myself get hung up or anything. I'm going to stay detached and see where it goes.

 

As no one on here understands her position at the moment I do believe her when she says she doesn't think about men. But it's not my position to divulge into her personal life so I can't explain why.

 

I said I owed her a night at the movies and she asked me to take her out. And thismorning she got in touch telling me she got herself a sports car and asked if I wanted to come out for a drive and see what it's like (I race cars as a hobby). So she's trying to spend time with me through MY interests?

 

Thanks for all the opinions guys.

 

 

 

sigh. learn the hard way. we all know how this story unfolds. gl.

[RogerWallace111]

yeah, it's up to you bud, good luck...

 

if having a friendship is what you want, and you can fully handle being just that, maybe you'll get it. but i feel like someone who tells you more than once that they don't love you doesn't really love you. not simply cause that's what the statement literally means, but because if you really loved someone you wouldn't say that type of **** to them, minus a possible blurt in moment of anger. i'll reiterate by quoting my last post

 

" It would appear to me to be in no way the type of "interest" that would hold promise of some revitalized, fresh start with her." especially after the type of flip-floppy **** she's put you through "...even if it could lead to sex or hanging out, it would be brief and end up biting you in the ass again."

 

anyway, do what you've gotta do, follow your gut instinct, no one can speak for you. then again, of course, even you can't really speak for her either, which leaves that unknown. meh, whatever, good luck

[AlexanderJames]

even you can't really speak for her either, which leaves that unknown. meh, whatever, good luck

 

Someones disappointed in me Haha.

Its that unknown that's going to cause problems if anything. But im trying hard to stay detached and see what happens.

 

Ill try keep this short but...

 

She came over on saturday arvo to see king, ended up staying for something like 5 hours. She was very different to the times leading up to me joining LS. She used to be detached, cold, distant and protected. But this time she was playful, close, flirty, confident and happy. We only briefly spoke about feelings, not bout US but she said she had been unhappy for a long time and feeling down. We agreed to steer away from that stuff and just enjoy each others company. We acted like we did during our relationship. I had her in tears laughing a few times. Tickling and cold hands and stuff. We said we werent going to have sex. I think she was shocked when I said I agree.

 

We put a movie on and had a little sleep in bed. I put my arm around her, but I kept distant cause I didnt want to overstep any bounderies. But she grabbed my hand tight and pulled me close and locked her feet in around mine. She held my hand the whole time she was lying there. I could have stayed there all night tbh. It felt perfect.

We got up after a couple of hours because we both had things to do that night. We lay there talking for a bit. She mentioned "We shouldnt be doing this its unhealthy" but kept just as close to me as she was. It bugged me a little but who knows why she could have said it. Maybe trying not to give it all away or something. Then despite our agreement she asked if I wanted to have sex. I said I didnt want to use her, and that I didnt want to be used by her. She said it wasnt the case, but how many women have heard that before then never heard from the guy again.

 

I was worried and hesitant. She said we didnt have to but I've never been more attracted to someone in my life and gavein to temptation. In times before she had said before hand no kissing or passionate stuff its just sex. But like her general mood and attitude this time was different. This isnt 50 shades of grey so I wont divulge. But it was very passionate and emotional. Like sex should be when its not just pointless. She didnt leave straight after either. She stayed with me for a while cuddling and making more flirty fun little conversation. She was in no hurry to leave, she even bailed on a friends 21st pre drinks to stay with me a bit longer.

 

We both went out to town that night. Didnt txt each other really because we were both out to have a good night and forget about life for a while. We sent a few txts in the early hours of the morning. But just pointless stuff like how drunk we were and where we were in town.

I recieved a message at like 6 am saying "Im confused but deffs hurry up :P" and another after saying "Lol soz that was meant for someone else" And then a pocket dial from her sunday around midday which was her talking with a guy friend about a carwash or something. I just hung up. Again she apologised and said it was an accident. I didnt think anything of them though they could well have been accidents.

 

She left her scarf at my house? So I told her I'd give it to her on tuesday when we went to the movies. We txt a bit last night, her saying she missed king and wanted to see him again soon. And to cuddle him for her. She also said she couldnt wait for tuesday.

 

I'm trying hard not to think too much about whats happening for risk of getting hurt again. But it's hard not to think she's acting a lot more open and happy around me. And she said she's been unhappy and down. But when shes with me she's happy, comfortable, and I make her laugh and have a good time. Thats gotta stand for something right?

Edited July 9, 2012 by AlexanderJames

[Chi townD]

Dude, you need to put a stop to this. You need to ask her what the hell is going on. You need an answer, because everything you wrote sounds like she was stringing you along. She probably heard that you're starting to date again and she couldn't cope with that.

 

So, you need to have THAT talk and quick!

[AlexanderJames]

I was thinking that..

I want to have a talk when I drop her off after the movies tomorrow. But at the same time I dont want to come across as needy and weak by bringing it up. Like there might be a chance she wants to revisit old feelings but I don't want to close the door on it by forcing an answer out of her when she still might be unsure herself if that makes sense.

 

So what I think I might do, is after the movies. Just tell her I've had a great time seeing her over the last couple of days. And then start up NC again and let her come to me. And if she asks to see me again or whatever THEN I'll bring it up and get an answer out of her.. What do you think?

 

That way I'm giving her the space to think or whatever. She might be stringing me on but at the same time it might be allowing for feelings to come back out. So by telling her I've enjoyed her company, dropping her off and then not contacting her it might make her wonder whats going on. She might start missing me more and more and remembering how good we were. Let her come to me. If she does I'll ask her of her intentions and if she doesnt make the effort then theres my answer.

[AlexanderJames]

But then I'd have to deal with the stress of going through NC not knowing what she's feeling... There's no closure in going out and having a great night with her then starting NC straight after... That could be tough.

 

But alas, if she's going to come back to me then wouldn't the best chance of that happening be to spend some time with her, let her remember how good I made her feel then suddenly get distant and abscent again without telling her I am doing so and leave her to her thoughts? Like ending it on a high? Cause I really enjoy her company and I can see she enjoys mine. I've never heard her laugh like she does around me.

 

So in that sence I guess even though it might be difficult for me I suppose I put myself in this position by ignoring everyones advice so It's do that or keep putting my heart on the line and fighting and hurting every day..

Edited July 9, 2012 by AlexanderJames

[Chi townD]

So what I think I might do, is after the movies. Just tell her I've had a great time seeing her over the last couple of days. And then start up NC again and let her come to me. And if she asks to see me again or whatever THEN I'll bring it up and get an answer out of her.. What do you think?

 

 

That's entirely up to you on how you want to handle this. This is just and advice forum and ultimately, the choices are yours to make.

 

You mentioned that you didn't want to come across as being needy or weak. I don't see how that can happen by asking where this is going or where you stand. I mean, if there's no chance of this going anywhere, don't you think you owe it to yourself to stop all the BS; end it and move on?

 

But, if she tells you she wants to try again? What boundries do you have in mind? What conditions? Because if things don't change, you're going to end up back at square one and broken up again. Would you suggest couples counseling or what?

[RogerWallace111]

Not disappointed in you man haaa! Sometimes that sort of **** is virtually impossible to resist... And if it weren't for us humans being so worried about the future, and having that need for security in the things we enjoy- having fun in the moment, shagging, and enjoying eachothers' company would be a purely positive thing. It's just that nagging feeling of not knowing that blows, and puts one in a not-so-great spot. Definitely sounds like she's being super cool and good to you all of a sudden, which is nice regardless. I see your dilemma on asking about your guys' real status... Ask too quickly and you might seem needy or less secure, but putting it off isn't great either.

 

When you say go nc after the movies I'm guessing you just mean not proposing hanging out, etc right ? Just not initiating contact yourself ? I'd imagine she'll probably be texting you later that night or the next day anyway. The only problem I'd have with that myself is that the being unsure would start to weigh on me more and more... I'm sure after the movies she'll say some **** like "had fun last night, wanna do something this weekend ?" But I suppose if you want it to work out you're probably best off taking the route you proposed. From the way it sounds, she very well could sometime soon ask you what your status was and say she wants to be official again. Just try to mentally prepare yourself for the possibility of not, or the possibility that things could change before long. When my ex came back to me after a two month hiatus, we hung out a few times over the course of the week, both were ecstatic/relieved to make it official again, and then she broke it off after 4 months. And she hadn't ever f*cked with me the way yours did... simply claimed that since she knew i wasn't going to marry her at this point in my life, prolonging things would hurt more.

It's obviously different for everyone, but i maintain that girls have the advantage and at least initially have an easier time walking away just because there will always be a few guys waiting around for her to call up. An attractive female doesn't have to anything to "seduce" a single guy and find comfort. That's kind of a random tangent, ha, but I guess I'm just saying to be careful assuming that she needs you super badly. Find out somehow I suppose... And I'm not saying her feelings in the moment aren't completely sincere as you've accessed them to be, but they can change of course.

 

Curious how it will unfold. Wish you the best ! And know that if I and many others were in your shoes we'd probably be doing the same, and taking the same risks. Just cause everyone on here says "don't do it !" doesn't mean half of them could resist, themselves.

[AlexanderJames]

Chi - Cheers for the input mate. I dont know if it comes across as needy and weak so much but I feel like it does run the risk of scaring her off byt trying to force a decision out of her before she is ready.

 

Roger - Always like reading your inputs buddy. Thats exactly what I meant. Like distancing myself by not initiating contact or asking to hang out. But if she contacts me I will reply but in a way that doesnt make me look like ive been hanging to hear from her. Like keeping cool and coming across impartial to the situation if that makes sense. I'd like to think that she will ask to see me again. But the lingering fear that she's impartial herself to it all is there but again theres only one way to find out isnt there. I was the first to txt her after seeing her saturday and her replies where pretty short and blunt. But we were both in town drunk so.. lol.

 

I don't think she will bring up the proposition of getting back together or seeing where I stand. She's never really been one to swallow her pride and take the first step. She might want to but I dont think that she'll be able to. If anything she will wait for me to bring it up. Which I will if she insists on spending more time with me.

 

I've already prepared myself for the worst. I've done it all once before I can do it again. But like you said sometimes we just have to take the risk and see what happens.

 

Youre right about it being easier for women for those reasons. But if we got back together and then left me I think I could cope easier knowing she left me and that I didnt crush her world and break her heart like I did the first time. If that makes sense. But at the same time, saying that an attractive girl doesnt need to do anything to seduce a single man for comfort. What does that say about her coming and spending time with me then sleeping with me? When she could easily have any single man she wanted.

 

I dont think she needs me. But from what I gather she's unhappy without me and shes happy when she's around me... So..

 

Thanks mate I'll keep you posted with how things go. No doubt Ill post a new thread a few days after taking her out for advice or cause I'm feeling blue. We'll see how things go.

Edited July 9, 2012 by AlexanderJames

[Svet74]

LIke seriously?

 

I do not get your ex at all

 

shes so retarded!

[AlexanderJames]

Good to hear from you too Svet Glad im not the only one a bit confused lol. It would be 8 hundred million times easier if she made her intentions obvious. But she's not acting anything like she did the first time when she was apparently "using me" so time will tell.

 

And yup sometimes I wish I didnt love her so much and wasnt so attracted to her..

[hinatticus]

Looks like you have your situation under some control. If this is the ex you talked to me about that you dumped, then i agree with you in that she doesn't fully trust you. Trust is a b*tch to earn back. And if your anger issues were a strain on the relationship before, you're doing a good job keeping calm. Keep passing those tests!

 

Good luck.

[AlexanderJames]

Thanks mate, this is indeed the same ex.

It wasnt the anger so much as when things took a turn for the serious or the worse I would turn heartless through fear. I would distance myself to protect myself and disregard her feelings. But in the sense its the same, she's testing the waters to see if I turn tail and run or get heartless again. More or less the same as anger, definitely the same strain on the relationship though.

 

Thanks mate

[AlexanderJames]

So I asked her what movie time she wanted to go to. And if she wanted me to pick her up.

She chose, said she was excited then said she would come get me in her new car to show me.

 

Then a couple hours later she says sorry I cant go tomorrow any more we will have to reschedule. Sorry!

I replied with "ok np let me know" and she said Im really sorry I'm not free til friday night?

"I said that's fine if she wants" and she replied okay I hope I haven't double booked stupid memory.

 

Don't care why she had to cancel tomorrow. Cause she's seeing someone else, family issues, work issues, personal reasons I couldn't care less. But the hope I haven't double booked line definitely gives me the impression that she is going to bail on friday night too.

If she does then I'm gonna have THAT talk with her then I'm going to walk away. Im not being strung along..