Cold_Hard_Truth Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 Anyone else ever wish that they had never read these cheating threads? After awhile it really makes you question things, people, relationships, etc. Hate to say it but I'd almost rather go through life alone than to have to go through the constant heartbreak that some of you have experienced. My heart goes out to you guys. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
irin Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 i really used to think cheating happened very rarely in really life, and most on tv soap operas movies, etcc... i think i was too sheltered now iv completely lost faith in the opposite sex. so many OW's. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 Deceptions of all sorts have been part of human existence since the very beginning. IME, compared to the generation I grew up in, people merely talk about them more now, and instant communication spreads the word faster. If I had interent access as a child of the 60's, I would have seen the Beaver Cleaver existence I grew up in was just one tiny part of how the world really was, and is. IME, the key to assuaging fear is acceptance. People cheat, lie and deceive; it's part of the human equation. OK, let's go. It's OK to go through life 'alone'. In fact, when one boils it down, each of us do. If you've looked into the eyes of someone as they're dying, you'll know what I mean. I hope you enjoy many positive associations with other humans before that day comes. Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 This section and the break up section terrify me! I've been cheated on and broken up with, blah blah all that, but damn when you read LS you feel like it's going to happen every time, sometimes. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 The only relationship that ends other than in a breakup or cheating, etc, is the one has when one or the other partner dies. It's the final one for the dead person. Otherwise, change is ever-present. No guarantees. Little 'fairness'. Many opportunities. Many choices. I see the cheating threads as learning opportunities. Since there are billions of relationships on the planet, these anecdotes are just a speck of sand on the beach of relationship dynamics. Good information, sure, but not the be-all and end-all of how things go in life. Link to post Share on other sites
Leopard Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 It doesn't depress me at all. On the contrary, I read all the issues that people post about and most of the time I haven't even heard of such problems before. I actually feel very good about myself because I don't have to face most of what people on LS face. I don't know if it's my approach or what not, but LS makes me feel like I have the perfect dating life lol Link to post Share on other sites
Radu Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 The only relationship that ends other than in a breakup or cheating, etc, is the one has when one or the other partner dies. It's the final one for the dead person. Otherwise, change is ever-present. No guarantees. Little 'fairness'. Many opportunities. Many choices. I see the cheating threads as learning opportunities. Since there are billions of relationships on the planet, these anecdotes are just a speck of sand on the beach of relationship dynamics. Good information, sure, but not the be-all and end-all of how things go in life. This is where i am right now. About 1yr ago when i first started reading LS, i got scared from these breakups ... quite scared. Link to post Share on other sites
KungFuJoe Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 You also have to consider that most people don't come to a user forum like this to talk about how great their life and relationship are. Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 You also have to consider that most people don't come to a user forum like this to talk about how great their life and relationship are. That is what I remind myself. Also, I will admit that when I read some of the insane things that people deal with and the horrific situations they CHOOSE TO STAY IN, I am grateful as hell for my R. Link to post Share on other sites
KR10N Posted July 7, 2012 Share Posted July 7, 2012 Couldn't agree more. This is why I refuse to get married. You just can't trust the people you think you trust. I'm all for being in a monogamous relationship w/ out marriage; and if my BF cheats on me, no strings attached, eh? Just cut 'em loose! Link to post Share on other sites
iambookworm Posted July 8, 2012 Share Posted July 8, 2012 for me, it makes me question my judgement. I trusted someone and he turned me into his OW. Yikes. Now, I don't know if I want to be in another relationship, or if I will, will I be able to trust the person? Link to post Share on other sites
GLDheart Posted July 8, 2012 Share Posted July 8, 2012 In life you need to take great risks to gain great rewards. Not all risks pay off. Reading here will simply educate yourself to the possible worst case scenario. It will still hurt if it happens. However, you can go into it with eyes wide open and the tools to handle it when it does. Link to post Share on other sites
Eddie Edirol Posted July 8, 2012 Share Posted July 8, 2012 Not all risks pay off. Reading here will simply educate yourself to the possible worst case scenario. It will still hurt if it happens. However, you can go into it with eyes wide open and the tools to handle it when it does. Exactly. People get into relationships and marriages for the wrong reasons sometimes. Their agendas can cloud their judgement. They get into relationships to get over an ex, to avoid bieng alone, they get married because biological clocks are ticking, the person they are married to is the best they can do because they dont learn how to find the person they really want, they ignore red flags about people in order to not have to start over, and when they get cheated on, they wonder why. If you learn how to make better judgement decisions, you can easily avoid these situations. Some people dont want to ruin the "romance" by being cautious, but you have to do it to avoid being hurt in the end. Dont go into relationships blind with rose colored glasses, thinking that you can immediately trust someone, and you can avoid all the situations that you are seeing here. Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted July 8, 2012 Share Posted July 8, 2012 It really makes me not trust women sometimes and it sets off the darkest aspects of my personality. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted July 8, 2012 Share Posted July 8, 2012 IMO, that's a healthy middle ground. As your wife did, they (women) can earn your trust and love (in general). No need to give it away. Link to post Share on other sites
WonderKid Posted July 8, 2012 Share Posted July 8, 2012 I can admit these threads do scare me but I learn a lot from them. I feel deeply for the deception that happened with people on here. And I post a lot of my experiences to get help and to educate others that possibly have the same situation as me. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts