amorsinmiel Posted July 6, 2004 Share Posted July 6, 2004 [font=century gothic][/font] Hi I'm new to this community. I have been dealing with the thought of separation and divorce for a while now. My husband and I have been married for a little over three years now, although we have been together for over ten years before we we're married We have three kids. Over the past year we have fought so many times that I lost count, we mostly fight over little things, but lately every time he gets angry at me he tells me to leave in a not so nice way. Twice I did, but my kids missed him so much and I did too. It seems that we have forgotten how to be nice to each other and having the kids does not help, one is a preteen, and the other two are in there terrible twos and threes which adds to our stress. Every time we turn around something goes wrong in our life, we discussed going to therapy together I even made the appointment my self but we failed to keep it since it seemed everything was okay. This past weekend we fought time and time again, he asked me to leave and told me he wanted a divorce, in my angered state I said fine by me. But once I calmed down and thought it through I realized I do't want a divorce! I want my family to stay together more than anything and I am willing to do what ever it takes to keep it in tact, I tried to talk to him later that evening and he refused telling me that this time its really over, telling me that I'll never change and I have to accept that this is it. I can't accept it! I want us to go to counseling and try to work it out, I don't want a separation either for I fear it will drive us even more apart. I'm really confused I even thought about just leaving and giving him the divorce if that what will make him happy but I won't be happy at all. I just don't know what to do ! Link to post Share on other sites
Matilda Posted July 7, 2004 Share Posted July 7, 2004 I don't think you should give up at all, at least from your end. Is he willing to work on the marriage at all? You two need to learn how to argue, or disagree, without disrespecting each other. I do think therapy might be helpful, or even reading some of the self-help books out there. (Dr. Phil's is one that comes to mind, since he talks a lot about respect in a marriage.) Also, there is a ton of good information on <URL removed> Link to post Share on other sites
TreeHugger Posted July 11, 2004 Share Posted July 11, 2004 I recently learned that relationships go through stages...that is where the term "Seven year itch" came from...a therapist was explaining that relationships seem to have a seven year cycle... Just something to think about...Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
ready2moveon26 Posted July 15, 2004 Share Posted July 15, 2004 I've lived my life, since my husband first cheated on me, not trusting any one! I don't trust men...I don't trust my friends, I don't trust my family, and I don't even trust myself...I probably need therapy. Link to post Share on other sites
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