Beez Posted July 6, 2004 Share Posted July 6, 2004 [font=courier new][/font][color=darkred][/color]I have myself caught up into a love square. I have been unhappily married for 11 years, but in the same hand married, one of my best friends. My two female best friends one, whom is a lesbian and the other Ive known for almost more than half my life knew nothing of each other until about last July. I have found my lesbian friend very attractive ever since I have known her and have been very drawn to her. The more I get to know her the more I love about her. We have known each other for about 10 years. My two best friends recently got together into a lesbian relationship and it absolutley killed me. My jealousy over the situation just about knocked me to my knees. I ended up writing my friend a letter telling her why I did not want her to go out with the other best friend and that I had feelings for her althought I would never act on them. She wrote me a letter back letting me know the feelings were mutual, but she loved my family and husband so much that nothing could ever come of the way we feel for each other. I never told my husband about the letters, nor did I tell him about how I felt about my friend. I am however no longer friends with either of my two best friends and feel like I have a huge hole missing in my heart. My husband has cheated on my 3 times but because of my 3 children and that fact that I have not completed college and am a stay at home mom, and the terror I feel that no one will ever want to date or be with a mother of three. It's a feeling of being scared to be a lone. I choose not to leave. I don't know what to do, I miss my friends dearly, and have tried to reconcile with them, and they don't seem interested. I personally investigate my husband(and am very good at it) and want to leave now, but the plan is for me to goto college for the next two years so I can get a good job to support myself and my kids. I am only 29. Do you think there is a chance that I might ever meet and be happy with somone who will love me and my kids??????????/ Link to post Share on other sites
brashgal Posted July 7, 2004 Share Posted July 7, 2004 They say there is a lid for every pot. I think you have a good plan, work on your education and self-esteem so you can support yourself. Make new friends - there are plenty of other people out there if your old 'friends' don't want to be friends. Link to post Share on other sites
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