Forgiving your mother's killer?

[BetheButterfly]

Hello,

 

A friend told me about a case the other day that she saw on Dr. Phil... of a lady and her brother who forgave their Mom's killer, an alcoholic whose wife was taking refuge in their house that day.

 

Below is the link to the story:

 

Dr. Phil.com - Shows - Murder of a Preacher's Wife

 

 

 

"Murder of a Preacher's Wife

 

July 3, 2012"

 

A section is the following:

 

"Dr. Phil points out that Rebecca is almost the same age as her mother was when she was killed.

 

“I’m 41, and Mom was 42,” Rebecca adds.

 

Dr. Phil shows a side-by-side photo of Rebecca and her mother, Ramona, noting how alike they look. Similarly, he shows a photo of Daniel next to his father’s photo, who also look very alike.

 

“Your parents would be so proud of the two of you,” Dr. Phil says.

 

Dr. Phil asks what Harris whispered to them when they met.

 

“He said, ‘I’m so sorry, and I love you both,’” Rebecca says.

 

“And he waited a long time,” Daniel adds.

 

“I believe that he’s truly sorry for what he did,” Rebecca says, turning to Harris. “I do, and I accept that apology even though we made a choice to forgive you a long time ago. We made a decision to move forward with our life because we didn’t know we would have this opportunity. This is just an amazing God-thing to me that got you here and us here on this show, so we could show people that we went through a horrendous, just unbelievable experience, and that you can somehow work through a process of forgiveness and healing and have hope on the other end of it. And I know it’s not easy for us, and I know it’s not easy for you and your family, because they missed out on all of those years with you.”

 

Dr. Phil.com

 

This is a very amazing story which I am glad to have learned about; the power of forgiveness is amazing!!!

If your Mom was killed, would you forgive the killer? I personally would find it difficult. It is one of the most difficult teachings of Jesus, I think: to forgive.

 

What are your thoughts on that?

 

It is interesting the voice message the husband of the wife who was killed, who himself was shot too, gave of forgiveness to the killer:

 

"Robert Nichols recorded his personal story on audiotape before he died. He included a message for Harris, who hears them for the first time.

 

Harris hears the voice from the past and responds.

 

Rebecca explains that her teen years were tough because she was very angry at God when her father died. “Part of the reason why he passed away at 46 years old was because he lost our mom, and he could not recover from that. He could not recover from knowing that he had a gun hanging on the wall that night, and not harmed you but defended our family. He could not let it go. He couldn’t forgive himself,” she tells Harris. Rebecca says after of couple years of being angry, she realized she needed God more than she needed to be mad at God."

 

I very much admire this family who has endured so much. I think it is good to post here because forgiveness is a vital part of Christian beliefs, and would be a good topic for discussion.

Would you forgive someone who hurt/killed a member of your family? I hope I would, based on Jesus' teachings, but I most definitely hope nobody hurts or kills my family, or anyone else for that matter!!!

[Radu]

No, i wouldn't.

 

He took not 1 life, but two that night. Her husband died soon after by a broken heart.

Their kids had an unhappy childhood.

 

So he took 2 lives in my eyes, and damaged 2 more.

 

To atone for something like this, i would expect him to give from himself unto others for the rest of his life, just words mean nothing in this case.

 

Also, on a personal level, i think Phil is scum.

[mercy]

I was always taught that forgiveness was for myself not others. Whether we forgive a person or not really has nothing to do with them.

 

Forgiveness comes easy for me because I want forgiveness.

 

But I really couldn't honestly say what I would do concerning my mom. I guess it's one of those things one would have to experience to know for sure.

 

Of course I'd love to think I would be the bigger person but who knows I may just shoot them down myself. One never knows. Though I have been taught differently.