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low self esteem-thank to parents


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i don';t now about u ,but i just figured out why i have so low self confidence and self esteeem. yesterday i lost my wallet right well not like i inteneded to lose it. what i should have done was just kept it to myself but i spoke out which i shouldn't "i lose my wallet". woow dad was crazy , negative harsh scolding criticism upon one to another same with mom in a harsh way. "why can u take care of ur stuff", "Your always so messy thats why" "where did u lose it " "always wear a zipper with ur wallet".....etc.....this went on for 3 hours last night and even today in the morning.

the thing that annoyed me the most is their repetive nature in saying it over and over again. i cancelled my mastercard, ....

what i am askin is this a asian -chinese cultural thing or is thing just my parents indivduality thing.

It like if i do something good its"good",(get a good mark, got a interview..) if i screw up on something(got a low mark, spilled milk, forgot to turn off the light) and we all do since we are humans my parents are like here come WW2. negative criticism, put downs, lecture on life, harsh scolding......that is why i have so low self confidence and self esteem.

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tattoomytoe

granted it does not help your self esteem to have what YOU already think about yourself affirmed by your parents....but it really all is up to YOU!

 

so stop the pity party..do stuff you are good at, do not set yourself up for failure, heck look at alll the other probs on this board!

 

you are only human, and people loose their wallets all the time.

 

and it IS hard to dispell the ideas that you have already about yourself and it will be hard, but you can be a more positive person, be happier, be more self assured.

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dudesomewhere

hehe

 

yeah, I don't know...it's been like that for me...I alway thought it was an Asian thing. So I chuckle cuz of the flashbacks, lol. It's more my mom though.

 

Um, not to get too repetitive myself on this but it's like Ben Stiller's character's mom and dad in the movie...mom is obnoxious while father is more understanding. Of course not always :)

 

It was good for me though...not in the sense that was intended but I built up one helluva callous to it all. And I don't think my mom intended me to have confidence, sad ain't it? But hellz if I ain't one confident bizatch when you know me :)

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