Masked Messages???

[Sailynn]

Three months ago, I was overworking and after hours classes, which caused my GF of 2 years to break up with me. I received a lot of blame. She told me she loved me but her feelings had changed and that continued contact with me would turn her into a bitch. After hearing that, I knew that my goose was cooked, so I stood up, turned to her and wished her well, said Good-bye and walked out the door.

 

I've had no contact for at all since then and over three months have passed. During these months, I've received group addressed e-mails from her. The messages are inspirational in nature. I've just ignored them.

 

We were in a civic club together and everyone knew us as a couple. Well, I decided to resign from the club to eliminate contact with her. I received a direct e-mail from her saying, "I pray that you are well and I wish you now and always, the very best."

I guess that was good-bye. I did respond and ask her exactly what she meant. I've received no other response, except for another group-addressed inspirational e-mail.

 

However, yesterday, I get home and there was a parcel from her. It contained a little book I had loaned her over two years ago. She had wrapped up the book, very neatly, and had a note attached saying, "Sorry to have kept your book so long." I mean, I don't care about the book. She could have burned it for all I care, yet why the nice and kind little note. It's masking something. I would know where I stand if she had said something like, here's your darned book back or " here scum". Sometimes in our relationship, we might have a little spat and afterwards, she'd always send me something in the mail to get my attention. I guess that's just her pattern.

 

My question is, Why after so long, has she mailed a book to me?

Does she want contact?

Is she purging her possesions?

Is she trying to hurt me?

 

In any case, it's contact and I know nothing more nor do I have any information to go on. I am totally unaware of her emotional state, albeit happy, sad, lonely or whatever, so I can't figure out the motivation.

 

I'm just gonna put the book back on my shelf and forget about it. If she wants contact, she'll have to initiate it. Meanwhile, I'm healing and moving on. I do love her, miss her and think about her all the time, but life is too short to play these games.

 

Any thoughts?

[dudesomewhere]

"but life is too short to play these games."

 

I think that's all she's doing.

[Bojickwoman]

She might be trying to subtly get you to initiate contact with her by copying you on the group emails etc. Hum, I think Dude might be right. Sounds like she is playing games. If she really wanted to talk to you, then all she needs to do is pick up the phone or send you a direct email.

[Sailynn]

She is a timid and shy person. She has never demonstrated to me throughout our dating that she is a person of great courage. In fact, when we first broke up, I told a friend that I thought she would never contact me 'cause she didn't have the guts.

Oh well.

 

I concur on your statement. If you have something to say to me,

"SAY IT."

"DON'T PLAY IT."

 

I have been through some tough breakups before and it doesn't get any easier. It may even be harder. I look at all this as an opportunity to renew my commitment to life and becoming a whole person and seeking out more people. Afterall, I got about 299 million more people to meet before I know everyone in America.