Consolidated discussion - Online dating

[Badsingularity]

Hello. I am a dinosaur made out of mashed potatoes and my favorite color is 34. What's yours?"

 

 

This message would probably get a better response from some women than a normal boring message even without the model pics because it's random and funny.

[MrCastle]

This message would probably get a better response from some women than a normal boring message even without the model pics because it's random and funny.

 

You know what, as I was typing it, I thought to myself, I'm going to try this next time I decide to try OLD. Can't hurt right?

[yongyong]

Well try read the whole profile that is an essay length, find something you can relate to it and send several paragraph message which is very genuine and sincere. you will be thinking, 'I think she will reply' You are Wrong.

 

Honestly, I am not there looking for friends.

If I don't see a possibility of banging the chick (too ugly and fat), I don't care what she says and what we have in common.

 

You could write something clever that will grab her attention but usually you guys will exchange some messages and not end up meeting each other.

 

If she likes you, she will respond as long as you say something average and normal.

 

Don't waste your time on online chicks

[MrCastle]

Yeah, that line is hilarious. I'm going to steal it and message a woman with it.

 

Tell us how it turns out. I'm curious now.

[yongyong]

100% women can spot fake compliments and know why guys are saying that. why do they still go home with a guy and spread their leg?

they know what they are getting into but it's irresistible.

It's about whether she likes you or not.

 

 

 

Most women can spot the cut and pastes.

[todreaminblue]

Just wondering how both men and women feel about it. Its my favorite method of messaging women online because it:

 

-Saves time

-Decreases the sting of rejection

-Is easy

-SAVES TIME

 

Yeah, I put "saves time" twice on purpose. Since the response rate from women online is so crappy, why waste hours reading profiles and crafting custom messages? I'll add one custom line from a random thing in her profile and cut & paste everything else.

 

Does anyone else do this and what is your opinion on it?

 

 

I can spot the cut and pasters and seeing those pasters are looking for mass responses or any response....that makes it sort of desperate in my view..so i dont reply....a bit of wit a bit of a humor and some reason why that person is interested in getting to know me other than for me to check out the vein in the side of his penis....and then i reply..i have quit online dating though....way too many veins for me to inspect and gone back to my tried and true way to meet exceptional men....in the interest groups and i am passionate about.....and form friendships first....that has worked for me always.. i have fun at the same time..online dating truly sucks lemons......deb

[ThaWholigan]

There is a go-to line I have most times if they have a minimal profile. I usually ask girls what kind of crazy messages they get, always gets me replies. I share some of the mad messages I have had too.

[Ami1uwant]

Why dont you post your generic message on here for us to see???

 

I bet i could tell its generic----women get many of them so they see ton of them so they ignore it. What probably skews your results is that you are probably appear to be more attractive than most guys so the women will take a chance on you.

[MrCastle]

JUST GOT A REPLY. IT WORKS. Hahahahahahahahah!!!

 

Chicks are so goofy. And this girl is hot too. Like an 8. Hahaha.. so stupid.

 

Damn! If you get a date or a lay out of one of the chicks who responds to that, I want some sort of cash payment

[SJC2008]

Hahahah!! So a man has to earn the right to talk to you? Get over yourself. You're not gonna reject George Clooney over a cut and paste so get lost with that BS.

 

I cut and paste and it works. And NO you can't spot it. Sorry.

 

Hahahahaha

 

Good point! I have gotten more responses from cut and paste messages than from "deep" "well thought" "intimate" "feathered Pen" messages combined lol! I TRY to mention something from their profile and then use my cut and paste.

 

99% of men aren't poets or English majors so if a simple introduction (LIKE IRL) won't do than the ladies who long for said messages are missing the boat on OLD. Which is to get a date. If you want to be swept off your feet by electronic correcspndence more power to you but you aren't my type I can assure you that. Oh and if you don't drop the digits by the 3rd/4th message I'm outie homie!

[oaks]

Does anyone else do this and what is your opinion on it?

 

Assuming there's actually any content in the woman's profile then I make sure that what I send relates to what she wrote. Does that mean they each get individual messages? Sometimes, but not necessarily. This woman likes running, a woman yesterday likes running, they might get the same message... and it might still not be cut-and-pasted, because typing isn't exactly hard. Why would two women with the same interests and generic profiles expect to get different messages?

[miss_jaclynrae]

Never done it before... seems lazy and impersonal though.

[serial muse]

Damn! If you get a date or a lay out of one of the chicks who responds to that, I want some sort of cash payment

 

Nice work, Cyrano.

 

Most women's profiles are generic. That's why I can create 3 cut and paste messages in a word file and just use the one that works best. 90% of women's profiles say the same crap and they all like the same stuff. When I see a truly unique profile I respond with a totally customized message. But its rare.

 

Er...I think the fact that the unusual dinosaur and potatoes thing is what actually worked kind of disproves your statement here, right?

 

...she's going to be disappointed when she realizes you weren't actually that creative.

[serial muse]

You actually looked for men with back hair?

 

Maybe it's because I haven't had coffee yet today but I laughed so hard at this.

 

(I think she meant to type "black hair. Goes to show that editing one's own writing is indeed essential.)

[spiderowl]

What do you mean by "creepy?" You mean they don't look like Chace Crawford or Zac Efron?

 

I don't think I said creepy(?) but I did say weird. It has nothing to do with looks and everything to do with their behaviour and attitude. I'm not into 'discipline', wearing suspenders and high heels (which he requests in the first message) or meeting because his wife no longer wants sex - and those are some of the less weird guys! I've been contacted by escorts, guys who claim to be fireman from calendars, guys who say they are strippers, guys who dress as women and want to go shopping with me, guys who make excessive and pointed claims to being a masseuse, fitness freaks who talk about their bodies all the time and what 'fit' thighs they've got and how we both need to relax ... I mean is this normal for romance these days?

[FitChick]

I've been contacted by ... guys who make excessive and pointed claims to being a masseuse

 

Either they are stupid and don't know that a masseuse is female while a masseur is male, or they are transgender. Either case is not good.

[Kcelleste]

I just started dating online and meet a few decent guys but I have a problem.

 

So far the guys I’ve meet look very different from the pictures I see online.

 

They either have

Longer or shorter hair

Gained or lost a lot of weight

Facial hair then to none

Really bad skin

lie about their height (usually very short)

Or just look unattractive in person compared to their pictures

 

Some guys I really enjoy talking with on the phone

And feel that we’re compatible but when I meet them in person

It all dies for me because I’m not attracted to them physically like I thought I was

Physical attraction is very important to me

I’m very honest on my profile and always keep up to date photos

And the guys always want to continue dating after we meet

BUT I’m not interested after the first meet

It’s frustrating

 

A friend suggested to try skype (online webcam) first because he was having the same issues with the pictures which is a great idea BUT

How do I let these guys down nicely without sounding like a jerk?

At first, I use to never return their calls or emails, which is such a mean way to show you’re not interested. Some guys seem like nice guys so I would hate to hurt their feelings. What is the best way to tell them I’m not longer interested in dating them after the first meet?

[Bob_Funk]

Exhibit A on why online dating is a waste of time for guys. Even if you manage to get a date, the girl will always always always reject you if your jaw isn't at the perfect angle or your eyes are just a little too close together. Next, motherf*cker! Next!!!

[monkey00]

Instead of being dodgy about the topic, you can be upfront. You'd be surprised but a lot of guys appreciate honesty...well the mature ones anyway. Tell them it was nice meeting them but you didn't feel a spark and good luck on the search, that's if they attempt to contact you / make plans.

[Vintage79]

I've gone out with plenty of women from online. I usually meet them at a place, so if something seems fishy (i.e. not looking like their picture, or just not as good as their pictures), I can get out in 15-30 minutes. Usually a few minutes of conversation is fine - if you try to high tail it out of the date in half an hour or less, hopefully they get the picture. If they try to get another date - simply tell them that you weren't feeling the chemistry...that doesn't say it was looks, more that two personalities didn't mesh - most don't...so it shouldn't be insulting or jerk-like.

 

Similarly, if a woman I ask out again and if she doesn't want to go out again - I always appreciate something. I usually don't want to know all of the real reasons, but simply a "no thanks" to a second date is really appreciated.

[phineas]

If they don't call me back after a 1st date the message is received & it's onto the next one.

 

I stopped taking it personally a few yrs ago. It's just not worth the time & energy wondering why.

simply because a woman will never tell you the reason why anyways & more than likely she doesn't even know the reason why.

 

I hear women who OLD complain about men who send them angry messages when the women don't respond to them.

 

Blows my mind.

I think I winked at someone on Match.com after I sent them a message because they didn't even look at my profile so I wasn't sure if they were subscribing member. (which is something I really dislike about that site)

 

But i'm fairly certain I didn't mail anyone twice in the 3 months I was on there.

They don't like me?

whatever.

 

OP, just ignore them. It's what most other women do anyways so they will get the picture.

[yongyong]

I agree with her.

 

I just hate those bitchxs here whining about 'oh guys are so shallow, you should look at her personality, Oh she gained here after wedding so what, she is still the same person'

 

Just meet them asap. don't waste time talking on the phone.

Tell them in advance, 'hey I can meet you during my lunch break just for half an hour at the coffee shop, is that cool?'

If you are attractive enough, no guys would say no.

[Ninjainpajamas]

I think It's polite to tell someone you are not interested in them If you set up a date through OLD and It doesn't turn out well.

 

You can tell them they were very nice and you thank them for meeting you but you are not interested.

 

I wouldn't do that on the actual date, but a text message would be appropriate or however you communicated.

 

This at least let's the other person you're not playing any games and there isn't any potential...If they start acting pissed off and insulting you then that's their own maturity level there...don't answer or respond and just leave it at that.

 

I don't think it's really appropriate or necessary to go into any kind of details...like you were too short, fat, you looked like that guy with one eye from the Goonies or anything to that affect...nothing that would affect and hurt them so just tell them the positives and you can clarify you are sure If you feel it's one of those "just give this a chance" guys.

 

I would also refrain from becoming frustrated..yeah it's disappointing but that's the potential outcome of OLD. If you're unsure what the person looks like then ask how recent their photos are or Is there anything different about you than the photos shown...It's appropriate question for the median of how you are meeting people since pictures are all you are going off of and most people put the very best of their photos online (especially women who seem to know the exact angle and contour of their faces and body to appear the skinniest and most attractive). However I'm not a woman so I cannot compare

 

Just be polite and respectful...the online dating world is not for the faint of heart, you do need to condition yourself to it...whether rejecting or being rejected.

[oaks]

I just started dating online and meet a few decent guys but I have a problem.

 

So far the guys I’ve meet look very different from the pictures I see online.

 

They either have

Longer or shorter hair

Gained or lost a lot of weight

Facial hair then to none

Really bad skin

lie about their height (usually very short)

 

Ask them if they look like their photos, how old the photos are and if they really are that height. If they lie then call them out on it!

 

Also, meet sooner. Wastes less time.

 

(if it makes you feel better - women do this, too)

[USMCHokie]

(if it makes you feel better - women do this, too)

 

I have never once lied or posted inaccurate pictures on OLD, but all of this has to make you wonder whether it's even worth it to be honest...if everyone's fibbing anyway, why not inflate your value in your profile to give yourself a fighting chance?