Mount Posted July 18, 2012 Share Posted July 18, 2012 I am still in NC, but feel so hurt and painful. When the pain will pass. Link to post Share on other sites
scatterd Posted July 18, 2012 Share Posted July 18, 2012 The hurt takes time and it seems when you finally let go of any chances of you being together it gets better. At least in my former relationships it was that way Have you been out and met new people if not try to stay busy.I hope you feel well soon. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mount Posted July 18, 2012 Author Share Posted July 18, 2012 (edited) It is so painful to cut him off, although knowing I am doing the right thing long term for myself, now my heart is so wrenched and try very hard holding the tears. And it is very hard when you are still working with MM, even no need to see each other everyday. During the weekend I cleaned up my work calendar, and intentionally cancelled one work meeting/lunch with the MM that scheduled long time ago, as I try to avoid him as much as I can. And the MM communicated to me wondering, I re-assured him that we shall only carry on pure work relationship due to some agreement we had. Somehow for the reaction of that matter the MM called me crazy, I felt so hurtful. Again I ignored and still keep NC (non-work related) so far. But I feel so painful, and I miss him so much . I really don't deserve that kind of pain.:( Edited July 18, 2012 by Mount Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mount Posted July 18, 2012 Author Share Posted July 18, 2012 I so want to send him a text now....pls help me stop .....And he hasn't contacted me since except a pure work related email reply 2 days ago. Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 I so want to send him a text now....pls help me stop .....And he hasn't contacted me since except a pure work related email reply 2 days ago. Do not text him! Find a new job - as soon as possible! Consider quitting today! Seeing him at work would only make it harder to move forward. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mount Posted July 19, 2012 Author Share Posted July 19, 2012 No, I can not quit, that is for sure. I will hold on not proceed any action....but it is so hard and painful. Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 Yes, you CAN quit! Choosing not to will prolong your pain. I've known women who quit jobs making big money to restore their sanity and life. If they can - you can too! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mount Posted July 19, 2012 Author Share Posted July 19, 2012 No, I don't want to quit - my current employer is the best. Pls do not dwell on that point for my issue/topic though, any other suggestion would be appreicated. Also we sit at different floors/places so don't see each other at all. Yes, you CAN quit! Choosing not to will prolong your pain. I've known women who quit jobs making big money to restore their sanity and life. If they can - you can too! Link to post Share on other sites
Barrsitter Posted July 19, 2012 Share Posted July 19, 2012 Dear Mount, I am so sorry for your pain. I know exactly how you feel. You want to text him and have everything be the way it was. Although you didn't say, I presume you decided to stop seeing him because the A was not meeting your needs. If that is true, then try as best you can, to not text him. I know it's hard. Believe, I know. Just take it 10 minutes at a time. Or one day at a time. I increased my hot yoga to every day as soon as I went NC. It really helped me get out the pain and hurt, through sweating. Maybe you could try exercising or doing something different. I also found changing my routine helpful. Perhaps you could write to a good friend instead of your xmm. I wish things could be better for you and me. But it seems that we are not meant to be with these xmms. In time, you will feel better but it seems to hurt worse than a break up from an available man. I don't know why. Please stay connected here. There are some decent, kind people who will help you. Love yourself too. That helps. Barr Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mount Posted July 19, 2012 Author Share Posted July 19, 2012 Dear Bar (chococate bar ) ), Thanks for your kind words and they mean a lot for me. Don't worry, I am whining HERE only but did not show anything in real life. Of course I did not text and I tried doing other stuffs to distract me. Believe me, working in the same organization with the MM is put more challenging for me to disconnect the A.:( But I will still choose working in the organization as I really like it. Dear Mount, I am so sorry for your pain. I know exactly how you feel. You want to text him and have everything be the way it was. Although you didn't say, I presume you decided to stop seeing him because the A was not meeting your needs. If that is true, then try as best you can, to not text him. I know it's hard. Believe, I know. Just take it 10 minutes at a time. Or one day at a time. I increased my hot yoga to every day as soon as I went NC. It really helped me get out the pain and hurt, through sweating. Maybe you could try exercising or doing something different. I also found changing my routine helpful. Perhaps you could write to a good friend instead of your xmm. I wish things could be better for you and me. But it seems that we are not meant to be with these xmms. In time, you will feel better but it seems to hurt worse than a break up from an available man. I don't know why. Please stay connected here. There are some decent, kind people who will help you. Love yourself too. That helps. Barr Link to post Share on other sites
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