Pintastic Posted July 22, 2012 Share Posted July 22, 2012 There wasn't consistency when we dated, the first time was wonderful, but the second I remember feeling hostile and insecure because it had been 5 weeks since I had seen him. H didn't seem happy with me looking back. I shouted at him a little because he got the wrong bus ticket, what an idiot these things happen. But I was worried about him getting home. I realised that was why he wasn't talking to me any more and realised my behaviour and apologised, we spoke briefly two days afterwards but My sister kept saying it was nothing, t means nothing, so I got even more depressed. My sister then text him on her phone, saying I just want to find out if hes using his phone because he didn't reply to any of my texts, which was immature looking back. I texted him on her phone in the morning and he got angry because I didn't tell him who it was. I had ran out of credit on my phone so i used my mums phone to see if he wanted to go for a drink, as i was going out with friends the following Fridays and wanted to know if he fancied joining. Of course I made mountain out of a mole hill and thought he wasn't going to reply as I thought I annoy him , so I sent him goodbye message. He sent me an error message so that I don't message him anymore. I worried I have hurt him even more, I realise looking back he was a sensitive guy and was insecure too even though he had alot more confidence then I did. I'm worried he won't be able to trust women even more, or worry he might think he won't find love or anything. I know he would have lost all respect for me, and I don't blame him. I got called crazy in town by too girls so obviously they know about it. I hate myself for what I did, he didn't deserve any of it, he's a lovely guy, he's got alot going for him. The guilt I feel id terrible and cuts me deep, because I did care about him and have strong feelings for him, but I went about everything the wrong way. I hope He's okay I worry about how He feels about what happened. this had never happened before I used to have confidence and it felt like something dark had taken over. I'm never going to be able to prove to him I can change and be the girl I was. I just hope the next girl treats him the way he should, because he's amazing. I'm finding it hard to move forward as I feel I don't deserve to. Link to post Share on other sites
M30USA Posted July 27, 2012 Share Posted July 27, 2012 Yeah, thus applies to anybody--man or woman. I wish ALL things applied to both men and women, but....*sigh* Some people just don't change. They can abuse one person after another, and suffer great loss for it, yet still not change. Link to post Share on other sites
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