jess19 Posted July 25, 2012 Share Posted July 25, 2012 (edited) Hi there, I'm a 26 yr old female in love with my best friend but there is more and it gets very complicated. We have been best friends for about 3 years and have known each other for about 5 now. I fell in love with her after traveling with her 3 years ago. We went traveling again last year, and I honestly feel like I have never connected with someone like I have with her. I love her so much and think about her all the time. I think about her even when I'm with her. I love spending time with her, I feel happy when I'm with her, I want to be with her all the time, it's crazy. I have never thought of anyone like I do her. I like men too, but nothing compared to her. I also feel like I wont be able to date till I'm over my feelings of her (I've tried) but I only think of her when I'm in a relationship, and they always end cuz of me. I've never been attracted to a girl like I have her either. I've also never experience a girl, but I feel like I could with her, and want to. She has a boyfriend too. I was very jealous when they started dating which was also 3 years ago. I thought it would end after 3 months cuz she always said she would never marry him, well they finally said their I loves you's just recently. It breaks my heart that she has said the I love you's to him now. I want nothing more than for her to be happy, but I can help but not like him cuz I'm so jealous. I would rather be her best friend for life than to have our relationship end because I told her. It's so hard for me though, I want her more than anything in this world. I also like to think that maybe she has feelings too, but I'm pretty sure she would never stray that way. We have had the "get with girls" conversations. When we party and drink we are basically attached at the hip. When we were traveling (and dating her BF) she said she just wanted to make out with someone, but the only person would be me. We have cuddled many times, basically being girls. I would say were flirty with each other too, which makes it even harder sometimes. I don't know what to do? This is killing me and I just need to get it off my chest. What do I do? I'm too scared to tell her and don't think I will ever want to unless I was sure she would respond in the same way back. Edited July 25, 2012 by jess19 Link to post Share on other sites
jeffmeyers Posted July 25, 2012 Share Posted July 25, 2012 Hi there, I'm a 26 yr old female in love with my best friend but there is more and it gets very complicated. We have been best friends for about 3 years and have known each other for about 5 now. I fell in love with her after traveling with her 3 years ago. We went traveling again last year, and I honestly feel like I have never connected with someone like I have with her. I love her so much and think about her all the time. I think about her even when I'm with her. I love spending time with her, I feel happy when I'm with her, I want to be with her all the time, it's crazy. I have never thought of anyone like I do her. I like men too, but nothing compared to her. I also feel like I wont be able to date till I'm over my feelings of her (I've tried) but I only think of her when I'm in a relationship, and they always end cuz of me. I've never been attracted to a girl like I have her either. I've also never experience a girl, but I feel like I could with her, and want to. She has a boyfriend too. I was very jealous when they started dating which was also 3 years ago. I thought it would end after 3 months cuz she always said she would never marry him, well they finally said their I loves you's just recently. It breaks my heart that she has said the I love you's to him now. I want nothing more than for her to be happy, but I can help but not like him cuz I'm so jealous. I would rather be her best friend for life than to have our relationship end because I told her. It's so hard for me though, I want her more than anything in this world. I also like to think that maybe she has feelings too, but I'm pretty sure she would never stray that way. We have had the "get with girls" conversations. When we party and drink we are basically attached at the hip. When we were traveling (and dating her BF) she said she just wanted to make out with someone, but the only person would be me. We have cuddled many times, basically being girls. I would say were flirty with each other too, which makes it even harder sometimes. I don't know what to do? This is killing me and I just need to get it off my chest. What do I do? I'm too scared to tell her and don't think I will ever want to unless I was sure she would respond in the same way back. Hot... Anyway, you laid it all out and it sounds she's already with someone else, someone serious and you are not ready to tell her anyway. What is there to tell you? Time to move on. Keep her as a friend, but maybe get some distance, meet new people and some new activities. Link to post Share on other sites
NoMagicBullet Posted July 25, 2012 Share Posted July 25, 2012 I think some distance is a good idea. You can't get over someone you're around all the time. Also, you're jealous of her boyfriend, and you may unintentionally say or do things that make things difficult for your friend and her BF. If she didn't have a boyfriend, I'd say tell her, but she's been with him 3 years now. I know you want to be a good friend to her, but you also need to be a good friend to yourself, and you're hurting. Distance will hurt at first, but will help you in the long run. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jess19 Posted July 25, 2012 Author Share Posted July 25, 2012 How do you distance yourself from a Best Friend? This seems like it would be a hard task to achieve. Link to post Share on other sites
jeffmeyers Posted July 26, 2012 Share Posted July 26, 2012 How do you distance yourself from a Best Friend? This seems like it would be a hard task to achieve. The same way you can with anyone else: hobbies, work, meeting other people. We all have limited time and can't be everywhere at once. It's not something you have to fake, by trying to get on with your life, you might actually enjoy it. Think of it this way, your friend had to limit her time with you by getting a boyfriend, but she still has you as a friend. Link to post Share on other sites
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