Is There An Age To 'Throw In the Towel' for Women?

[McGuffin]

Hmm, this sounds somewhat similar to my belief. I refuse to be played the fool. Happened waaaaay too many times before. Like when I stood up in front of a class and read out my story, thinking it was awesome, and was met with mockery.

 

Yeah. It's a defense mechanism, and those don't come from nowhere. I know you're not just a negative person for no reason. You weren't just born that way. You've had things that caused you to get that way.

 

We want to protect ourselves, but sometimes our armor does more than keep out stuff that hurts. It can keep out all the good stuff, too.

 

But I still wouldn't go so far as to say I don't accept the good. I am just much less trusting of it. It must prove itself. I will believe good things about myself when they can be proven and supported. Isn't that a pragmatic way to make sure you strike the right balance of reality?

 

I can't think of anything to argue with that logic of that. All I can come back to is whether it makes you happy.

[verhrzn]

Do you have any action plan to break your pattern of doing this? Have you discussed possible methods of breaking the patterns with a counsellor...or would you rather just keep things the way they are, even if retaining the status quo carries the price tag of your potential for happiness and personal growth?

 

No, counselors haven't suggested any pattern breaking. Honestly, I'm not even sure I see patterns. Where do you see them?

 

I can't think of anything to argue with that logic of that. All I can come back to is whether it makes you happy.

 

*Sigh* Again, which is better.... a life of happiness but ignorance? I don't know if I could ever forgive myself if I lost myself to delusion.

 

The most humiliating situation I can imagine is walking into a bar thinking I'm attractive. Maybe even thinking I'm hot stuff. And then having people look at me, snicker behind their hands, or make faces at their friends, or even say out loud "Oh God, she went out into public like that?" It's already humiliating to embarrass yourself in front of others, but the idea that I could have prevented it through self-awareness ("You are way too fat to wear that") haunts me.

 

Check, check.....test.

 

Is this thing on?

 

Yes, I just have nothing interesting to say in response. Sorry....

Edited July 26, 2012 by verhrzn

[Lonely Ronin]

So they instead want me to believe that I am absolutely ordinary, nothing special, absolutely average in every way. Except that doesn't explain my absolute disaster of a love life or a career.

It explains a lot more than you think. I'm willing to bet that your need for external validation is so strong you overlooked a lot of stuff. You dated guys, because hey I'm dating someone. In your eyes that makes you superior to a girl who is single. This need for external validation blinded you to these guys faults. When they slapped you in the face with their issues, instead of being happy about being rid of them now that you know who they really are, you turned all the negativity on your self. To be blunt most people won't date someone who has an outlook on life like yours. It sucks the joy out of everything.

 

I know you don't believe me, but when your outlook on life improves so will your love life.

 

It's the same way with your career. I used to have a guy that worked for me, and he was negative about everything. even his jokes where negative. No one wanted to work on projects with him, or deal with him unless they absolutely had to. He made everything a dreary grind, and people don't want to deal with that.

 

when your outlook on life improves so will your life.

 

Or if someone isn't unique in some way, why even bother with life? If you can't put your own stamp in the world, why be here?

Because their is more to life than leaving your hand prints and signature in concrete. Their are simple joys in life, like completing a project, or enjoying an evening breeze in the fall, or millions of other things. Most people fill their lives with these simple joys.

[verhrzn]

It explains a lot more than you think. I'm willing to bet that your need for external validation is so strong you overlooked a lot of stuff. You dated guys, because hey I'm dating someone. In your eyes that makes you superior to a girl who is single. This need for external validation blinded you to these guys faults. When they slapped you in the face with their issues, instead of being happy about being rid of them now that you know who they really are, you turned all the negativity on your self. To be blunt most people won't date someone who has an outlook on life like yours. It sucks the joy out of everything.

 

Wait a sec.... so I should have been glad to be rid of these guys (even though they dumped me, and moved on to hotter girls), and took all the negativity... and yet at the same time it was totally my fault because no one wants to date me?? Huh?

 

... Also I never understand being happy to be rid of someone with "issues," considering that that "issue"-filled person goes on to live a happily ever after with a hot girl. Seems to me that means I lost something great, and they were well rid of me.

 

Because their is more to life than leaving your hand prints and signature in concrete. Their are simple joys in life, like completing a project, or enjoying an evening breeze in the fall, or millions of other things. Most people fill their lives with these simple joys.

 

Like I said, I don't enjoy "simple" joys. I just... don't. I don't feel joyful. Sunsets and coffees and all that stuff are just... things. They don't give life meaning, they're just there. I know thinking that makes me a soul-suck of an individual, but it's how I am.

 

Of course, the argument goes, if I change everything about myself, am I still there? It seems, by this forum, that I should change absolutely everything about me. My attitude, my looks, my style, my hobbies, my personality, my social skills.... At a certain point you have to ask, isn't authenticity important? If I'm changing myself to be happy, is that leading a truthful life? If I must change everything about me to be happy, then maybe I don't exist to be happy? If I hide myself wherever I go, am I ever really there?

[Taramere]

No, counselors haven't suggested any pattern breaking. Honestly, I'm not even sure I see patterns. Where do you see them?

 

Of the threads of yours that I've contributed to, you've generally raised the subject of getting bullied at school...so I suppose I see a pattern of you reliving that period in your life whenever you're unhappy. The messages you continually give yourself seem to be regurgitations of the messages those girls gave you back in school.

 

You know how some people become bullies because in order to escape the feeling of victimhood? Well, with you it's almost like that....you're becoming the bully of your schooldays, but it's not other people you're bullying. It's yourself. You've internalised those girls', your critics', comments and now you replay them in your head every day. Constantly sabotaging yourself with those negative, mocking messages.

 

That's a very clear pattern, and it's the pattern I mean when I talk about addressing it with a counsellor. You won't progress until you learn to consciously challenge and overcome those critics' voices in your head. At the moment you've no motivation to do that. It's almost as though you want us, the people on Loveshack, to step in and deal with them for you.

 

People do try. They alternate between berating you, reasoning with you and extending unconditional validation...but none of that works, and of course it doesn't work. It's no more possible for people contributing to this site to stop those critical voices in your head than it would be for us to go back in time and sort out the girls who bullied you all those years ago. Until you start challenging your internal critics and making a stand against them, that schoolyard bullying is going on and on.

 

You have to learn to silence your demons, V. That means learning techniques to distract yourself every time the internal critic starts sending you destructive, sabotaging messages....and that's the part a counsellor could help with. Recognising triggers that send you into this downward spiral of pessimistic thinking, and learning techniques to halt the downward spiral and get yourself back on track.

 

You say your negative thinking is realism. Well, I think there's some academic evidence supporting the notion that pessimists have a more realistic outlook on life. However, they don't tend to succeed in the way that optimists do. Optimists are willing to risk the humiliation, embarrassment and ridicule because they have a goal.

 

That's what makes them deserving of the success. They cared enough to risk putting themselves through all that....and obviously there was some resilient part of them that knew they could cope with humiliation, embarrassment and ridicule.

[fishtaco]

Wait a sec.... so I should have been glad to be rid of these guys (even though they dumped me, and moved on to hotter girls), and took all the negativity... and yet at the same time it was totally my fault because no one wants to date me?? Huh?

 

... Also I never understand being happy to be rid of someone with "issues," considering that that "issue"-filled person goes on to live a happily ever after with a hot girl. Seems to me that means I lost something great, and they were well rid of me.

 

Yes. Who cares about them? Care about you. If you were unhappy with them, then the fact that they're gone is a good thing, regardless of where they end up.

 

So you'd rather an abusive boyfriend punch you in the face every day, than have him run off with a hot chick?

 

You really need external validation too much.

 

Like I said, I don't enjoy "simple" joys. I just... don't. I don't feel joyful. Sunsets and coffees and all that stuff are just... things. They don't give life meaning, they're just there. I know thinking that makes me a soul-suck of an individual, but it's how I am.

 

Of course, the argument goes, if I change everything about myself, am I still there? It seems, by this forum, that I should change absolutely everything about me. My attitude, my looks, my style, my hobbies, my personality, my social skills.... At a certain point you have to ask, isn't authenticity important? If I'm changing myself to be happy, is that leading a truthful life? If I must change everything about me to be happy, then maybe I don't exist to be happy? If I hide myself wherever I go, am I ever really there?

 

I believe dating is the least of your problems. You are seeking professional help I hope. And I don't mean this as a derogatory remark. You need to get healthy first. Once you're healthy, dating will become easier. You are like a runner trying to run with a pulled hamstring. It's going to be painful, and everyone's going to pass you up. Get that hamstring healed first before you start running.

[Pirouette]

*Sigh* Again, which is better.... a life of happiness but ignorance? I don't know if I could ever forgive myself if I lost myself to delusion.

 

The most humiliating situation I can imagine is walking into a bar thinking I'm attractive. Maybe even thinking I'm hot stuff. And then having people look at me, snicker behind their hands, or make faces at their friends, or even say out loud "Oh God, she went out into public like that?" It's already humiliating to embarrass yourself in front of others, but the idea that I could have prevented it through self-awareness ("You are way too fat to wear that") haunts me.

 

Why does it have to be so extreme, that either you're hot and everyone will notice you and fawn, or you're a hideous troll and everyone will want to burn you at the stake for daring to go out amongst the normals?

 

What about this scenario? I think I'm ok looking, not amazingly beautiful, but not so hideous that I scare small children. I'm wearing a dress or a shirt and jeans that is size appropriate, that I think looks decent. I go to the bar because I have as much right as anyone else to go there if I feel like it. I know that not everyone will be attracted to me, that maybe no one will be attracted to me, and that even if they aren't, no one will likely care enough to be actively rude to me. The people who would be be rude to me for absolutely no reason are the kind of mean-spirited, poisonous people that I would hate to be around anyway. I have some drinks, chat to my friend, and go home if nothing more happens than that. It was a decent night out.

 

You don't think this is much more of a likely scenario?

 

And also are you saying you lack the ability to objectively look at you styling and outfits and determine if they are socially acceptable?

 

Ok, I couldn't help myself from responding more. Really, I'd like to have these discussions with you, and I thought that's what you were after as well?

[tman666]

Of course, the argument goes, if I change everything about myself, am I still there? It seems, by this forum, that I should change absolutely everything about me. My attitude, my looks, my style, my hobbies, my personality, my social skills.... At a certain point you have to ask, isn't authenticity important? If I'm changing myself to be happy, is that leading a truthful life? If I must change everything about me to be happy, then maybe I don't exist to be happy? If I hide myself wherever I go, am I ever really there?

 

When I walked onto the rugby team in college, I didn't know how to play rugby. As in, I'd never seen a rugby game. I had no confidence in my ability to not make a complete fool of myself, let alone play the game.

 

I got fumbled the ball a lot. I missed all my tackles. I got run over by guys half my size. There were a lot of times early on that I walked off the field after games biting my lip, choking back tears with my throat knotted up, feeling like the weakest, slowest piece of **** on the planet.

 

But as I kept practicing and playing the game, I got better. I learned where I needed to be on the field. I learned the best way to tackle someone who is sprinting at you. I gained the confidence to dive into the ruck.

 

Basically, I pretended to be a rugby player until I realized one day that I was a rugby player.

 

I know you don't want to be a phony, but you need to practice happiness. It might seem pointless for a long time until one day you snap to and realize the feelings are genuine.

[SarahRose]

Then why is there a constant message that women over 30 are "used up"? Why are women told that they better settle for any guy who asks them out, or they'll never find anyone "in time"?

 

And I am also wanting to focus this issue on never-married women. It'd be a little naive to suggest that if a woman has never been married past a "certain age," she acquires a not-nice social label. So I am curious what age that is.

 

 

Have you ever thought it is just a lie.

[McGuffin]

The most humiliating situation I can imagine is walking into a bar thinking I'm attractive. Maybe even thinking I'm hot stuff. And then having people look at me, snicker behind their hands, or make faces at their friends, or even say out loud "Oh God, she went out into public like that?" It's already humiliating to embarrass yourself in front of others, but the idea that I could have prevented it through self-awareness ("You are way too fat to wear that") haunts me.

 

I completely identify with that. When I was a kid, most of what I did was motivated by trying to avoid situations where people could trick me or make fun of me.

 

I wish I could tell you exactly how and why I stopped thinking like that.

 

Of course, the argument goes, if I change everything about myself, am I still there? It seems, by this forum, that I should change absolutely everything about me. My attitude, my looks, my style, my hobbies, my personality, my social skills.... At a certain point you have to ask, isn't authenticity important? If I'm changing myself to be happy, is that leading a truthful life? If I must change everything about me to be happy, then maybe I don't exist to be happy? If I hide myself wherever I go, am I ever really there?

 

You can change and still be you. You don't have to change what makes other people happy. I'm not the same as I was when I was younger, but I'm also not like the majority either. I'm a nerd who writes fan fic and cosplays and doesn't like socializing with groups of people. I'm still who I've always been in my heart but I'm happy.

 

People are just giving you ideas about what has made them happy. If they're not right for you, then you don't have to do them. You don't have to change everything about yourself. Unless you want to continue exactly as you are, you do have to change something. (Einstein said the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.)

[verhrzn]

Until you start challenging your internal critics and making a stand against them, that schoolyard bullying is going on and on.

 

You have to learn to silence your demons, V. That means learning techniques to distract yourself every time the internal critic starts sending you destructive, sabotaging messages....and that's the part a counsellor could help with. Recognising triggers that send you into this downward spiral of pessimistic thinking, and learning techniques to halt the downward spiral and get yourself back on track.

 

You say your negative thinking is realism. Well, I think there's some academic evidence supporting the notion that pessimists have a more realistic outlook on life. However, they don't tend to succeed in the way that optimists do. Optimists are willing to risk the humiliation, embarrassment and ridicule because they have a goal.

 

That's what makes them deserving of the success. They cared enough to risk putting themselves through all that....and obviously there was some resilient part of them that knew they could cope with humiliation, embarrassment and ridicule.

 

Well, there you come to the ultimate crux of it, and the question I've been asking in the last few posts: what if the critics are right? I would rather have an accurate, if miserable, portrait of myself, then a fake one, because in the end, if I come up against some problem, at least it's not because I'm being delusional.

 

Okay, good example... let's say I loved male models. And I was constantly chasing them, trying to get them to date me. And they wouldn't. "Well", I say to my delusional self, "why aren't they? Maybe they're intimidated by me!"

The real truth is it's because I'm not attractive enough to tempt them, but in my "I'm attractive and awesome!" Happy Delusion, I am not able to face that ugly (pun) truth.

 

Whereas by facing the ugly truth, I know exactly why male models wouldn't date me, and thus don't waste my time bothering.

 

Does that make sense?

[Lonely Ronin]

Wait a sec.... so I should have been glad to be rid of these guys (even though they dumped me, and moved on to hotter girls).

 

Yes, because they were not good for you.

 

 

 

and took all the negativity... and yet at the same time it was totally my fault because no one wants to date me?? Huh?

Saying you overlooked some stuff, is not the same as saying it's all your fault, stop being so negative

 

 

... Also I never understand being happy to be rid of someone with "issues," considering that that "issue"-filled person goes on to live a happily ever after with a hot girl. Seems to me that means I lost something great, and they were well rid of me.

Being good for someone else, is not the same as being good for you.

 

Of course, the argument goes, if I change everything about myself, am I still there? It seems, by this forum, that I should change absolutely everything about me. My attitude, my looks, my style, my hobbies, my personality, my social skills.... At a certain point you have to ask, isn't authenticity important? If I'm changing myself to be happy, is that leading a truthful life? If I must change everything about me to be happy, then maybe I don't exist to be happy? If I hide myself wherever I go, am I ever really there?

 

Stop being so extreme, no one said you have to change everything... You have been over and over this topic several times across numerous threads, and probably approached it from every angle possible. You are bound to get a wide spectrum of responses when you have this many people involved.

 

 

If you ignore the haters just trying to make themselves feel better, and boiled down all the responses you have received over thousands of replies i think you would find the commonalities are something like this.

 

1. stop taking everything to extremes

2. decrease your reliance on external validation

3. learn to take joy in things

 

These three things would lead to an evolution of who you are as a person, not a complete rewrite.

[dreamingoftigers]

Perhaps you are miserable, unsaleable and altogether a nightmare.

 

Do you know what that is?

 

A starting point.

 

You can start by looking at your qualities and think, what do I need to get from a to b. Just something small on the way to "Z" which is your ideal after all.

[verhrzn]

Why does it have to be so extreme, that either you're hot and everyone will notice you and fawn, or you're a hideous troll and everyone will want to burn you at the stake for daring to go out amongst the normals?

 

What about this scenario? I think I'm ok looking, not amazingly beautiful, but not so hideous that I scare small children. I'm wearing a dress or a shirt and jeans that is size appropriate, that I think looks decent. I go to the bar because I have as much right as anyone else to go there if I feel like it. I know that not everyone will be attracted to me, that maybe no one will be attracted to me, and that even if they aren't, no one will likely care enough to be actively rude to me. The people who would be be rude to me for absolutely no reason are the kind of mean-spirited, poisonous people that I would hate to be around anyway. I have some drinks, chat to my friend, and go home if nothing more happens than that. It was a decent night out.

 

You don't think this is much more of a likely scenario?

 

And also are you saying you lack the ability to objectively look at you styling and outfits and determine if they are socially acceptable?

 

Well, I'm saying that if I was delusional, I would lack the objectivity to style myself in a socially acceptable way. Knowing that I am ugly/fat, I avoid clothes that emphasis the fat, articulate the ugly, or display my body too much.

 

It's kind of like all those "People at Walmart" photos... I know I will never be in those, because I think I am way too ugly to wear a thong or go out in public in tight pants. But if I thought I was hot, I'd dress LIKE I was hot; tight clothes, bulging where there shouldn't be, etc.

 

Most people aren't actively rude to me, but that's also partially because I make an effort to fly under the radar and be non-offensive. In the times I've attempted to be confident (dress in a "sexy" way) I got majorly slammed AND ignored. So, between the choices of Be Normal = Be Ignored, or Be Sexy = Get Insulted AND Be Ignored... I'll obviously choose the former.

[Taramere]

Well, there you come to the ultimate crux of it, and the question I've been asking in the last few posts: what if the critics are right? I would rather have an accurate, if miserable, portrait of myself, then a fake one, because in the end, if I come up against some problem, at least it's not because I'm being delusional.

 

Okay, good example... let's say I loved male models. And I was constantly chasing them, trying to get them to date me. And they wouldn't. "Well", I say to my delusional self, "why aren't they? Maybe they're intimidated by me!"

The real truth is it's because I'm not attractive enough to tempt them, but in my "I'm attractive and awesome!" Happy Delusion, I am not able to face that ugly (pun) truth.

 

Whereas by facing the ugly truth, I know exactly why male models wouldn't date me, and thus don't waste my time bothering.

 

Does that make sense?

 

If you're attracted to a male model because of his looks, rather than because there's something has sparked off some strong instant intellectual or emotional connection between you, then yes it makes sense.

 

Unless there was an overwhelming connection between you, or you could offer potential for some dynamic that he found appealing (ie the handsome beefcake with the cool, successful businesswoman/quirky intellectual/maternal type) you'd have to have comparable female model looks. Most of us would fail in that department.

 

From what I've seen of your picture you're a nice looking girl with big boobs who probably doesn't like to put them on display...and when big boobs aren't on display, they can look a bit mumsy.

 

Do you wear fairly low cut tops? You've a perfectly nice face, at 123 pounds (and 5 ft 1") you're not overweight by anybody other than a fashion nazi's standards. I find it very difficult to believe that you don't get attention from men when you put make up on and have the boys on display.

[joystickd]

I always thought women were their most attractive in 30s and 40s. I had a woman in her 50s that tried to talk to me that was very sexy . Chronological age is just a number and beauty is subjective.

[Pirouette]

Well, I'm saying that if I was delusional, I would lack the objectivity to style myself in a socially acceptable way. Knowing that I am ugly/fat, I avoid clothes that emphasis the fat, articulate the ugly, or display my body too much.

 

It's kind of like all those "People at Walmart" photos... I know I will never be in those, because I think I am way too ugly to wear a thong or go out in public in tight pants. But if I thought I was hot, I'd dress LIKE I was hot; tight clothes, bulging where there shouldn't be, etc.

 

Most people aren't actively rude to me, but that's also partially because I make an effort to fly under the radar and be non-offensive. In the times I've attempted to be confident (dress in a "sexy" way) I got majorly slammed AND ignored. So, between the choices of Be Normal = Be Ignored, or Be Sexy = Get Insulted AND Be Ignored... I'll obviously choose the former.

 

Ok, so if you know that you'll never be delusional enough to think you're hot stuff if you were obese or looked like a troll, why is this fear even a blip on your radar? What's so delusional about thinking that you're ok looking if people don't cringe from you in horror and you've been on dates and had boyfriends? Seems a logical conclusion to make about yourself.

 

As for clothing, if you're unsure if it looks good, play on the safe side and don't wear anything too outrageous or revealing. Even if I had a hotter bod, I wouldn't be wearing skin tight stuff or plunging necklines because it isn't me, and I'd feel ridiculous even if no one thought so. I'd be wearing the same things, only a little smaller to fit my smaller frame, but I still think I look fine.

 

What is your normal and do you not think that you look fine?

[Janesays]

Nice BNL quote, V.

 

Guys, I think it's time we accepted that this is the way V WANTS to be. It's impossible to force change on someone who doesn't want it and honestly, who are we to try? Just leave her alone.

[MrNate 2.0]

Nice BNL quote, V.

 

Guys, I think it's time we accepted that this is the way V WANTS to be. It's impossible to force change on someone who doesn't want it and honestly, who are we to try? Just leave her alone.

 

 

Yep. Which is why I stopped long ago.

 

There comes a point where people have to realize they have to help themselves for progress to be made.

[writergal]

This thread is just like all her other threads. Nothing new. Just pages and pages of circular whining (i.e. thinking in circles). Speaking of which, I stumbled across a blog that very well could have been written by V, herself. Anyone agree?

[Easyguy14]

If you're attracted to a male model because of his looks, rather than because there's something has sparked off some strong instant intellectual or emotional connection between you, then yes it makes sense.

 

Unless there was an overwhelming connection between you, or you could offer potential for some dynamic that he found appealing (ie the handsome beefcake with the cool, successful businesswoman/quirky intellectual/maternal type) you'd have to have comparable female model looks. Most of us would fail in that department.

 

From what I've seen of your picture you're a nice looking girl with big boobs who probably doesn't like to put them on display...and when big boobs aren't on display, they can look a bit mumsy.

 

Do you wear fairly low cut tops? You've a perfectly nice face, at 123 pounds (and 5 ft 1") you're not overweight by anybody other than a fashion nazi's standards. I find it very difficult to believe that you don't get attention from men when you put make up on and have the boys on display.

 

yea something isnt right about this thread. I find it hard to believe its the most true. this pity me stuff is getting old. if really huge out of shape girls are getting men of some caliber theres no reason the op cannot. I think the op is a troll and thrives on the popularity of people replying to her. she even has over 500 posts. thats ridiculous! will you people stop feeding her already. theres much better posts to review than this.

[Easyguy14]

Nice BNL quote, V.

 

Guys, I think it's time we accepted that this is the way V WANTS to be. It's impossible to force change on someone who doesn't want it and honestly, who are we to try? Just leave her alone.

 

agree wholly. people please stop replying to her threads about pity. she'll go away then. lots of other interesting threads so why cant people go and check them out and leave this one alone.

[writergal]

yea something isnt right about this thread. I find it hard to believe its the most true. this pity me stuff is getting old. if really huge out of shape girls are getting men of some caliber theres no reason the op cannot. I think the op is a troll and thrives on the popularity of people replying to her. she even has over 500 posts. thats ridiculous! will you people stop feeding her already. theres much better posts to review than this.

 

This. Truer words were never spoken. She's admitted to trolling other forums before in some of her threads, so it wouldn't surprise me if that's what she's doing here in LoveShack. I thought the same thing about her after responding to one of her multiple suicide threads.

 

I find her to be a very disingenuous person, always have. She thrives on twisting the meaning of people's posts to suit her own agenda, and she manipulates by rejecting every single poster's good advice with deflection, which is the #1 tactic of a master manipulator. I've watched her take advantage of people's good nature who show her genuine concern, and it makes me sick, to be honest.

Edited July 27, 2012 by writergal

[verhrzn]

This. Truer words were never spoken. She's admitted to trolling other forums before in some of her threads, so it wouldn't surprise me if that's what she's doing here in LoveShack.

 

I find her to be a very disingenuous person, always have. She thrives on twisting the meaning of people's posts to suit her own agenda, she manipulates by rejecting every single poster's good advice with deflection, which is the #1 tactic of a master manipulator.

 

Where the heck did I say I troll other forums?? I have absolutely never done this. I do post occasionally in other forums, but I've posted the exact same life story that I do here. (Gaius can attest to that, he knows me from another forum.)

 

If you're gonna acuse me of things, at least get some evidence to back it up. You wanna talk trolling... what exactly are you doing? You constantly wander into my threads, just to throw names at me. If that isn't trolling, I don't know what is.

 

Aren't you just as circular, whining about my whining? Why do you constantly follow me around on this forum? Do you get off on feeling superior? Feel superior that you see the real "troll" me that no one else sees.... including the few posters who have actually seen me on FB, and know that this is how I just genuinely am? Why are you so obsessed with bullying me?

Edited July 27, 2012 by verhrzn

[McGuffin]

yea something isnt right about this thread. I find it hard to believe its the most true. this pity me stuff is getting old. if really huge out of shape girls are getting men of some caliber theres no reason the op cannot. I think the op is a troll and thrives on the popularity of people replying to her. she even has over 500 posts. thats ridiculous! will you people stop feeding her already. theres much better posts to review than this.

 

That's not at all helpful. You're just feeding into her insecurities.

 

agree wholly. people please stop replying to her threads about pity. she'll go away then. lots of other interesting threads so why cant people go and check them out and leave this one alone.

 

How about you go away and read those threads then? What's the harm to you even if everything you say is true? Nothing really. I think v's thread is interesting and I don't want her to go away.

 

I want you to go away. Believe what you want but there's no reason to be mean. You can silently stop reading.