LucyInTheSky1 Posted July 28, 2012 Share Posted July 28, 2012 After a night out with a close male friend, he admitted he had feelings for me. We'd both been drinking and he tried to kiss me. The first time, I pulled away, but then he tried again and I didn't pull away. It went no further than that, but we slept in the same bed. The guilt is eating me up inside and I just don't know what to do. I have an amazing boyfriend of 9 months who I'm very much in love with. I know for a fact now that I couldn't ever do this again, and I haven't told him. The last thing I ever want to do is hurt him. What should I do? I'm just so ashamed of m,yself and I know he deserves better than me, but I'm so scared to lose him. Please help Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted July 28, 2012 Share Posted July 28, 2012 How can you say in one breath "we kissed, it went no further" and then add on "oh but also slept in the same bed." Why didn't you go home? Why did you give in? WHY would you sleep in the same bed?! You need to tell your poor BF. And not blame this on alcohol. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
scatterd Posted July 28, 2012 Share Posted July 28, 2012 I am glad it did not go any further. I would be careful who you drink with in the future. When drinking it makes us say and do what we normally would not. Your guilt is a sign you dint like what you did, make this a learning lesson. If you put your self in a situation thats no good things can happen. Ask your self what you would like your boyfriend to do. That maybe your answer. Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
GLDheart Posted July 28, 2012 Share Posted July 28, 2012 I'm not sure about you, OP. But when I kiss, my hands are part of the game. Telling is totally up to you. It WILL expose the damage you did to your boyfriends trust in you. Just remember, that damage IS already done... He just doesn't know it yet. If he ever finds out, how he learns about it makes a big difference to his recovery. Link to post Share on other sites
nofool4u Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 After a night out with a close male friend, he admitted he had feelings for me. We'd both been drinking and he tried to kiss me. The first time, I pulled away, but then he tried again and I didn't pull away. It went no further than that, but we slept in the same bed. The guilt is eating me up inside and I just don't know what to do. I have an amazing boyfriend of 9 months who I'm very much in love with. Well you bf can't be all that amazing if you were alone with another guy. I know for a fact now that I couldn't ever do this again Only one way you can be sure...and thats to not hang out alone with other men. And sorry, but now this "close male friend" is no longer a friend. You both crossed the friendship line. So if your bf really is amazing and you love him, then no longer should you hand out with this other guy. The last thing I ever want to do is hurt him. What should I do? I'm just so ashamed of m,yself and I know he deserves better than me, but I'm so scared to lose him. Please help Well, honestly, if you respect your bf, you will tell him so he knows the type of person he is dating. Because as long as you keep him in the dark, you will think its perfectly ok to keep hanging out with this male friend, or any others. Sure, have friends of the opposite sex, but never hang out with them alone, much less when drinking. If you must party with other men, then your bf should be around. Ya, I know, that is suppose to be unrealistic, but the problem is, you've just made the case for those that will say there is no such thing as "just friends" of the opposite sex. So, what are you going to do? You going to continue to hang out with other men? And maybe it takes almost losing your bf to keep you from doing this in the future. Link to post Share on other sites
nofool4u Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 How can you say in one breath "we kissed, it went no further" and then add on "oh but also slept in the same bed." Ya, something fishy there. As if the thinking went, "wow, we just kissed, so instead of going home, I'm going to lay with him here all night and not do a thing":rolleyes: Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 also no offense but how can you say "I know for a fact this will never happen again" ? I'm sure before it happened you would've said "I know for a fact I will NEVER cheat on my bf".... but you still did... so there's that... Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted July 31, 2012 Share Posted July 31, 2012 Maybe you're not really into your boyfriend or don't think you deserve him? It's not a smart idea to go out for the night drinking with a close male friend when you have a boyfriend, even that's kind of crossing the line. You must have known something like this might happen. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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