dyna85 Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 I thought you loved me like I loved you. I felt it deep within my soul. How could I be so wrong? I have never been led so astray by my heart. How can I ever trust my heart again after this? Wtf. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
FixItCris Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 Happy birthday 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dyna85 Posted February 6, 2015 Share Posted February 6, 2015 Is it okay to miss someone who hurt me so bad? 4 Link to post Share on other sites
JPMC Posted February 6, 2015 Share Posted February 6, 2015 Stop running around my dreams. I'm doing great without you. I miss you from time to time but not enough to contact or cyber stalk you. Link to post Share on other sites
persevere Posted February 6, 2015 Share Posted February 6, 2015 I'm going through this right now. Ex broke up with me on New years days..after having spent christmas with my mom and sister and myself. It was completly unexpected, as there had only been a few minor blowups. She just said "there's a problem" and that she "needed her space". She mentioned "We can still see each other. I just need my space." I had very strong suspicions she was having an affair with her married boss (the problem?). I have been NC since new years day. She did text me 5 days later saying she "hoped I was doing Okay". I didn't repsond. It has been difficult. The thing that has helped the most is basically, I got mad. She dumped me on new years day, after my family had gotten her gifts and met her (the worst part). We did not see each other on new years eve because I was working and was very much looking forward to celebrating with her new years night. She texted me on new years day saying she was going to her (female) friends house that night and "maybe tomorrow we can get together and talk". She was willing to let me stew for 24 hours. I later thought she was most likely not going to her friends, but to her bosses house (as she had done for his birthday). So, yeah. Get mad. Stand strong. Do something. Realize she is a total heartless, selfish B***h and get back out there. There are better women. Always. Also, use EVERY breakup as a learning example. If you are analyzing your actions and hers from when you went out and later, while grieving, see (as you always do) things that you KNEW, but were in denial at the time (because you may not have wanted to sour things). Then, teach yourself never to do those again. IF you suspect a mate of cheating, lay it on the line then. DON'T think...ACT. Ask questions. Don't lay in idle and await the pain. NC...all the way. Great original post, BTW. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
love1336x Posted February 7, 2015 Share Posted February 7, 2015 I know I still have power over you. My question is... Do I want to use this power? You're an idiot. You'll never find another catch like me again. Ever. Simply put, your an idiot. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Nolan 93 Posted February 7, 2015 Share Posted February 7, 2015 I know I still have power over you. My question is... Do I want to use this power? You're an idiot. You'll never find another catch like me again. Ever. Simply put, your an idiot. I think my ex will find someone like me again, but I think later on in life. She had a great catch, and I hope she knows that. But she would rather give me up and try again with her ex, sad how one can be selfish as to dump you for the past. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
xpaperxcutx Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 I think my ex will find someone like me again, but I think later on in life. She had a great catch, and I hope she knows that. But she would rather give me up and try again with her ex, sad how one can be selfish as to dump you for the past. Well, my ex just recently dumped me for someone new. What does that mean? I'm the mistake? Link to post Share on other sites
Cupid's Puppet Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 I ran into Peanut today. I was so surprised, and I always had a feeling I would run into him at Walmart. It was just inevitable since we live in nearby towns. Anyways I jumped and hugged him and we just talked about how I'm liking the City. I told him I'll see him at the end of the month for the alumni meeting. I'm not sure if I'll join the alumni chapter though. $100 is pretty steep. Link to post Share on other sites
Nolan 93 Posted February 8, 2015 Share Posted February 8, 2015 Well, my ex just recently dumped me for someone new. What does that mean? I'm the mistake? Well I wouldn't say you were a mistake. How long have you been dating, and why the break up? Link to post Share on other sites
xpaperxcutx Posted February 12, 2015 Share Posted February 12, 2015 Well I wouldn't say you were a mistake. How long have you been dating, and why the break up? Three years. He broke up with me because I say a lot of things to hurt his pride. I was very immature in the beginning and I said a lot of things out of anger to put him down. He left me because he met another girl and he said he fell in love with her because she wasn't me. He literally implied I was a mistake to him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
love1336x Posted February 14, 2015 Share Posted February 14, 2015 One foot in the past, the other in present. Why? What's wrong with me? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
dyna85 Posted February 15, 2015 Share Posted February 15, 2015 Oh my God you guys... this nc thing is really for the birds. Ugh... I'm so depressed. Can this all just be a bad dream and I wake up from it now? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Oneness Posted February 16, 2015 Share Posted February 16, 2015 Oh my God you guys... this nc thing is really for the birds. Ugh... I'm so depressed. Can this all just be a bad dream and I wake up from it now? Yup, I am with you on that! I want it to be a bad dream, and I wake up in the arms of my exboyfriend...but all the abuse would have been part of the bad dream. A part of me will always want him back....but I can't have the "him," I want back, he is not that man anymore - he was never "just," that man! He was Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde.... But I will be 49 soon...I am done...no more relationships for me. Even if I wanted someone else (and I don't even want to try), I have years of damage to heal, by that time how old will I be...60? Forget it.... Link to post Share on other sites
dyna85 Posted February 16, 2015 Share Posted February 16, 2015 Yup, I am with you on that! I want it to be a bad dream, and I wake up in the arms of my exboyfriend...but all the abuse would have been part of the bad dream. A part of me will always want him back....but I can't have the "him," I want back, he is not that man anymore - he was never "just," that man! He was Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde.... But I will be 49 soon...I am done...no more relationships for me. Even if I wanted someone else (and I don't even want to try), I have years of damage to heal, by that time how old will I be...60? Forget it.... Yes, I know how you feel. Your post on the 'how are you coping today thread' really hit home with me today and expressed my thoughts exactly. Truly. I think that a part of me will always want him back too, even though I know he's no good for me given his past actions. Logically, I shouldn't be holding on, but my heart will not give it up. I look at these other posts like 'he treated me like a princess' and I close my eyes and shake my head, because he definitely didn't... yet my heart won't get on board with reality and wake up and smell the coffee. Letting go is a painful thing... I hate that I fell for his flawed nature and all he did was hurt me. It's so unjust. But 49 is the new 30 girl. Don't say that... Best thing is not to think long term right now. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other. We'll get there eventually. Everything seems impossible sometimes... Link to post Share on other sites
AprilTears Posted March 6, 2015 Share Posted March 6, 2015 (edited) Posted in wrong thread Edited March 6, 2015 by AprilTears Posted in wrong thread Link to post Share on other sites
milk Posted March 11, 2015 Share Posted March 11, 2015 Help. I know my ex feels so guilty for hurting me so many times in our past relationship. I am so tempted to text him that I loathe him so much for putting me through so much emotionally and physically but never taking time to do simple things like playing the piano for me or going to a cafe that I've always wanted to go to with him.. I did so much for him and got nothing in return.. I really want to do this so he will know how badly he has hurt me but a part of me still has hope that he will come back and that this message may scare him off.. I know i shouldn't have hope.. I am 3 days nc (would have been 1 week but he contacted me 4 days ago and he made me think he wanted to reconcile) and don't want to set myself back but I want him to know so badly.. Link to post Share on other sites
jak77 Posted March 19, 2015 Share Posted March 19, 2015 Almost 5 months since the breakup for me. She said she liked another guy. She met him only 2 weeks before that, and was saying that we would get married later 2 months before. I didn't seen that coming. Fortunately for my mental and physical health I went NC on day 1. She texted me a few times... ****ed me up every time. And yet I still love her, I just can't block her, it's too difficult. She sent me a text 2 weeks ago. I think she was drunk, it was 3am. She just asked if I was ok. I was hell of surprised to see that. Maybe I should have ignored it, but I couldn't. I just said yes. She texted back the next night, probably drunk again considering the time/grammatical errors. She reproached me not to send news. I have to admit it pissed me of, after she kissed that guy, and emotionally cheated (and lied) for 2 weeks before she left. I got kind of mad at her, saying that we wouldn't be friends after what she did, and that she didn't have any right to reproach me that. I know it was the right thing to do. I'm not texting her again after what she did. Ever. But I think about her, and I miss her all the time. I wonder if our last conversation means that she's never gonna write back. Sometimes I hope it is, sometimes I just want her to write again. Link to post Share on other sites
TunaCat Posted March 28, 2015 Share Posted March 28, 2015 I actually really needed this. Going through the first breakup when I was the one who got dumped. I'm the one who does the dumping. So the no contact thing is harder for me than it normally is. Link to post Share on other sites
Calidude6 Posted April 27, 2015 Share Posted April 27, 2015 So doing NC is the best way? It either fully lets them go or either they start to miss and contact you? Link to post Share on other sites
Zetec Posted April 28, 2015 Share Posted April 28, 2015 So doing NC is the best way? It either fully lets them go or either they start to miss and contact you? It depends what you want from NC. I personally wouldn't use it as a way of getting your ex to miss you - it doesn't always work like that. I went NC on day 1 of being dumped and haven't heard a word since (3 months now) and doubt I ever will again. What NC has done for me, is given me the chance to really take some time out and evaluate my situation and ask myself some questions - Was the relationship really going to work? Did I really love her? Do I really miss her or just the friendship/companionship? Is this an opportunity for me to do something new with my life/go somewhere new/make new friends? You'll find NC will clear your head and help you look at things from a more rational, sensible point of view, and not act on impulse. Hope this has helped 7 Link to post Share on other sites
Calidude6 Posted April 28, 2015 Share Posted April 28, 2015 It depends what you want from NC. I personally wouldn't use it as a way of getting your ex to miss you - it doesn't always work like that. I went NC on day 1 of being dumped and haven't heard a word since (3 months now) and doubt I ever will again. What NC has done for me, is given me the chance to really take some time out and evaluate my situation and ask myself some questions - Was the relationship really going to work? Did I really love her? Do I really miss her or just the friendship/companionship? Is this an opportunity for me to do something new with my life/go somewhere new/make new friends? You'll find NC will clear your head and help you look at things from a more rational, sensible point of view, and not act on impulse. Hope this has helped The NC does two things for me. In the past, it has helped me move on and clear my head but at the same time, 6 months after being dumped by another girl she comes back and we start to date again. I use NC to move on, reflect and learn from the experience as well as giving the other person their own time. If they come back, they come back but I don't force anything. I might say something to them once months go by as a surprise but rather have them hit me up first. As far as my situation right now, I'm in the process of NC and getting better each day. This girl is the girl I really want a future with but I don't plan to bug her at all. I might drop a txt in a month or 2, something simple. As long as i am improving then it's working great. I'll have a little hope for us but will still keep moving forward. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Zetec Posted April 28, 2015 Share Posted April 28, 2015 As far as my situation right now, I'm in the process of NC and getting better each day. This girl is the girl I really want a future with but I don't plan to bug her at all. I might drop a txt in a month or 2, something simple. As long as i am improving then it's working great. I'll have a little hope for us but will still keep moving forward. Good man, sounds like you are doing okay Hope all goes well, and whatever happens (she comes back, or she doesn't) you end up happy - that's the most important thing! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Calidude6 Posted April 29, 2015 Share Posted April 29, 2015 2.5 years ago, Her best friend, the one that told me I should go on a date with my ex. She gave her number, I pretended to be some creep guy that was stalking her just to break the ice a little and it made her laugh and what not. I think of that and for some odd reason I want to talk to her best friend about that and me and my ex. However, I'm sure that's not a good idea at all talk to a friend's ex even tho they like me.. Link to post Share on other sites
biggles6087 Posted May 19, 2015 Share Posted May 19, 2015 (edited) This the first time since Thursday I haven't contacted the ex we dated for two months an actually been friends for about 7 months before that she asked me yesterday could we be still friends I said no I needed space she dumped me she asked the second time and I put my foot down and still said no i needed time to think about it , altho I do miss her a small bit I haven't picked up the phone not once today to text I'm not going to be needy or sound desperate,.I have done enough already and there is only so much I can do and to be honest it seems to be working because I'm actually feeling alot stronger in myself. Edited May 19, 2015 by biggles6087 sorting typos Link to post Share on other sites
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