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we have the same fantasy, now what?


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I have a friend I've known for years (no, no, keep reading, it gets more fun, I promise) and recently we became aware that we share a certain sexual fantasy. We've always just seen each other around casually and just 'liked' each other's stuff on fb, but never really more than that. Lately though, since we noticed that we have this fantasy in common, we've been facebooking, messaging, texting, emailing every day.

 

It's been fun and everything, but now I find myself (ok, here's the usual 'should I like my friend or does she like me' thing), liking her and wanting to actually talk to her and see her and maybe act out on those fantasies a bit. But, I don't want to scare her off, or lose what friendship we've had (we hang out with a lot of the same people). What would be a good way to proceed? Also, I'm worried we might feel kinda awkward when and if we finally do get together.

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Depends on the sexual fantasy...

 

But make no mistake about it, the friendship will change if you do get together.

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It's not a super involved fantasy, mostly mild role-play. But losing the friendship or having it change in a not good way is what worries me. I'm still at the point where I could walk away and it was all in good fun, but I'm getting close to the point where I really want something to happen with this girl.

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Then can the fantasy be with anyone or is the issue really about upgrading your relationship with her?

 

If it's the former then there is no real problem here. You just need to find someone else.

 

If it's the latter then welcome to the type of dilemma we see posted all the time at this forum.

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SincereOnlineGuy
we have the same fantasy, now what?

 

 

 

Well there are a million permutations of this answer.

 

 

If, for example, your shared fantasy involves solo sex with a chess piece, the commonality is almost meaningless.

 

If there is room for two parties, of your respective genders, then it could be game-on.

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Then can the fantasy be with anyone or is the issue really about upgrading your relationship with her?

 

If it's the former then there is no real problem here. You just need to find someone else.

 

If it's the latter then welcome to the type of dilemma we see posted all the time at this forum.

 

Ha ha, yeah, the latter, now that I think about it...guess that sharing the fantasy kind of opened the door. Now I'm not sure how to go back, I keep thinking about her. Damn, I think you're right

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