Ladies: Do you want to be approached less or more?

[fortyninethousand322]

You would dislike it if somebody came to you and said you look cute/handsome?

 

Is that what an "approach" is? I thought it was just a stranger coming up to you making small talk/shooting the s**t with maybe a compliment mixed in here or there.

 

Also, I think most women have a lot of confidence and know they look good. They don't need a stranger going up to them and telling them something they already know.

[DreamerDeceiver]

I don't think women like being approached. Which is why guys shouldn't approach them. We wouldn't want to be bothered like that, so why bother others?

 

I truly wish you unparalleled success in your dating life, having an attitude like that.

[fortyninethousand322]

I truly wish you unparalleled success in your dating life, having an attitude like that.

 

What does this even mean? I've tried "approaching" before, and it's always been poorly received. So what I learned from that experience is women generally don't like strangers engaging them in any kind of protracted conversation.

[brahmabull117]

Also, I think most women have a lot of confidence and know they look good. They don't need a stranger going up to them and telling them something they already know.

 

Good looking women are confident?

 

 

http://gifsforum.com/images/gif/lol/grand/rteZP.gif

 

 

 

Wait, you're actually serious?

[brahmabull117]

I've tried "approaching" before, and it's always been poorly received .

 

 

You gotta do it with the belief that you'll be successful...

 

 

 

If you're awkward, the whole process will be awkward. If you're happy and comfortable, the other person will be happy and comfortable. When it comes to socializing, how you feel inside is very infectious

 

 

 

if you never approach, you're going to die alone

Edited August 4, 2012 by brahmabull117

[Cracker Jack]

The whole "I already tried it but it didn't work" is nothing but an excuse. I've had approaches that could be considered "bad", and I've also had some that were great. If you always hold the belief that something's going to go wrong, then you're never going to get anywhere. Took me a while to really understand it, but now I realize the importance of what that means.

 

Let go of the excuses and start gaining control of your life. We only have one to live, after all.

[AD1980]

All depends on how physically attracted to you they are

 

Ive seen too many eye rolls and "god i hope this unattractive guy doesnt approach me" looks when approaching women

[communityFan]

All depends on how physically attracted to you they are

 

Ive seen too many eye rolls and "god i hope this unattractive guy doesnt approach me" looks when approaching women

 

This seriously happens to you or is this a figment of your imagination?

[irc333]

You gotta do it with the belief that you'll be successful...

 

 

 

If you're awkward, the whole process will be awkward. If you're happy and comfortable, the other person will be happy and comfortable. When it comes to socializing, how you feel inside is very infectious

 

 

 

if you never approach, you're going to die alone

 

 

Or, you have admit, a lot of people are just *******s these days, and aren't open to speaking to others.

[RiverRunning]

I have NEVER been approached.

 

I suspect that's because I'm overweight (albeit not drastically...I really think only thin women ever get approached, though. By ANY guy).

 

I had a guy stare at me in a store once. He looked like a full-on creeper. The kind who hacks up people and mails their bodies places. That kind of crazy.

 

I wish I would get approached more. It would make my day to get that kind of validation about my appearance (all of my validation is internal).

 

If the guy seems somewhat normal, I'm open to it. i.e., doesn't give off the 'I'm crazy' vibe, seems reasonably intelligent and polite, etc.

[Taramere]

Yes, I like being approached as long as it's in a friendly and natural rather than cheesy (PUA style) way.

 

I was in the park earlier today, and a dog approached me to be patted. Dogs are naturals. I got talking to its owner, and before long there was a group of dogs (and a couple of men)around me. The human alphamale of the group, a man in his late 60s, asked me to ensure that I'm in the park tomorrow morning so that we can have a lively discussion about Thatcherism, Ayn Rand and the CIA.

 

That's about as close as I get to a date these days.

 

There is one of the dogmen, though, who I have a definite eye for. I've seen him around for a while, and we often chat. From his body language and eye contact he likes me back. When he came over today, I quickly switched the subject away from politics and onto something that I could be all girly and goo-eyed about (he really doesn't strike me as a political kind of guy).

 

I'm going to have to do a bit of exploratory work to find out if he's single. If he is, then he can definitely hit on me, but I don't know if he's got the oomph to do it. I can see us, in twenty years time, still not past the stage of exchanging eye contact and shy grins....so I could use a bit of advice here on what I could do to move this one forward a little.

[SincereOnlineGuy]

approaching strange women

 

 

Uh, this thread is about "ladies";

 

When you see a so-called "strange woman" in public, you would do well to turn and run.

[Kamille]

 

There is one of the dogmen, though, who I have a definite eye for. I've seen him around for a while, and we often chat. From his body language and eye contact he likes me back. When he came over today, I quickly switched the subject away from politics and onto something that I could be all girly and goo-eyed about (he really doesn't strike me as a political kind of guy).

 

I'm going to have to do a bit of exploratory work to find out if he's single. If he is, then he can definitely hit on me, but I don't know if he's got the oomph to do it. I can see us, in twenty years time, still not past the stage of exchanging eye contact and shy grins....so I could use a bit of advice here on what I could do to move this one forward a little.

 

I'm really not good at flirting with men - maybe start a thread about this and we can all reap benefits from the advice you get. All that comes to my mind is this: bring up the topic of activities you do when not walking the dog. Hope one comes up where you can say: We could do it together sometime. Then leave it up to him to set it up. In my experience, if the guy is interested, this usually works.

[Imajerk17]

I approached 3 women this week. All 3 reactions were great, 1 out of 3 is engaged, another 1 out of 3 has a boyfriend, but the 3rd is single! I have a date on Tuesday.

 

I'm 5'8" and in my late 30's--and a fairly late bloomer when it comes to this dating thing.

[brahmabull117]

I approached 3 women this week. All 3 reactions were great, 1 out of 3 is engaged, another 1 out of 3 has a boyfriend, but the 3rd is single! I have a date on Tuesday.

 

I'm 5'8" and in my late 30's--and a fairly late bloomer when it comes to this dating thing.

 

 

Fantastic

 

 

Where did you meet them?

[Imajerk17]

Fantastic

 

 

Where did you meet them?

 

Girl#1: Was walking w a friend down the street and I saw Girl and *her* friend having a glass of wine together at an outdoor table at a cafe. (It was evening.) I excused myself from my friend and went over to talk w her. Wauns very flattered. Talked to her and her friend for 5 minutes. Has a boyfriend.

 

Girl #2: A good two inches taller than I. Looked like she played sports in college. I saw her at the grocery store. I went over and talked to her. We had a fun 5 minute intetaction. She was engaged.

 

Girl #3: Met her on the street walking her dog. Petted her dog and talked to her. Sweet girl. What a body! Got her number called her and we have a date.

 

That is why I think threads like these are misguided. If you think women want you to approach them you're right. If you don't then you're right too.

Edited August 5, 2012 by Imajerk17

[Shaun-Dro]

Yes, I like being approached as long as it's in a friendly and natural rather than cheesy (PUA style) way.

 

I was in the park earlier today, and a dog approached me to be patted. Dogs are naturals. I got talking to its owner, and before long there was a group of dogs (and a couple of men)around me. The human alphamale of the group, a man in his late 60s, asked me to ensure that I'm in the park tomorrow morning so that we can have a lively discussion about Thatcherism, Ayn Rand and the CIA.

 

That's about as close as I get to a date these days.

 

There is one of the dogmen, though, who I have a definite eye for. I've seen him around for a while, and we often chat. From his body language and eye contact he likes me back. When he came over today, I quickly switched the subject away from politics and onto something that I could be all girly and goo-eyed about (he really doesn't strike me as a political kind of guy).

 

I'm going to have to do a bit of exploratory work to find out if he's single. If he is, then he can definitely hit on me, but I don't know if he's got the oomph to do it. I can see us, in twenty years time, still not past the stage of exchanging eye contact and shy grins....so I could use a bit of advice here on what I could do to move this one forward a little.

 

I'm glad you found someone you like. Now stop wasting time and just toss out a casual "Why don't I see a ring on that finger? Did the dog bite it off" kind of joke to get the ball rolling.

 

You women never cease to amaze me at how much you complicate things that are the easiest things to do because men will never feel resistance to put up a wall for your efforts. But in vice-versa, a guy has to come up to you and be as creative as possible just to borrow your ears for a minute.

[brahmabull117]

Girl#1: Was walking w a friend down the street and I saw Girl and *her* friend having a glass of wine together at an outdoor table at a cafe. (It was evening.) I excused myself from my friend and went over to talk w her. Wauns very flattered. Talked to her and her friend for 5 minutes. Has a boyfriend.

 

Girl #2: A good two inches taller than I. Looked like she played sports in college. I saw her at the grocery store. I went over and talked to her. We had a fun 5 minute intetaction. She was engaged.

 

Girl #3: Met her on the street walking her dog. Petted her dog and talked to her. Sweet girl. What a body! Got her number called her and we have a date.

 

That is why I think threads like these are misguided. If you think women want you to approach them you're right. If you don't then you're right too.

 

 

 

http://fringebowlteamblog.com/images/the_rock_clap_clap_gif.gif

[Shaun-Dro]

Girl#1: Was walking w a friend down the street and I saw Girl and *her* friend having a glass of wine together at an outdoor table at a cafe. (It was evening.) I excused myself from my friend and went over to talk w her. Wauns very flattered. Talked to her and her friend for 5 minutes. Has a boyfriend.

 

Girl #2: A good two inches taller than I. Looked like she played sports in college. I saw her at the grocery store. I went over and talked to her. We had a fun 5 minute intetaction. She was engaged.

 

Girl #3: Met her on the street walking her dog. Petted her dog and talked to her. Sweet girl. What a body! Got her number called her and we have a date.

 

That is why I think threads like these are misguided. If you think women want you to approach them you're right. If you don't then you're right too.

 

Not meaning to cramp your style, but whenever a woman is that easy in giving out her number and agreeing to a date, they tend to flake, so just be prepared. But I'm sure it won't bother a guy like you.

[Imajerk17]

http://fringebowlteamblog.com/images/the_rock_clap_clap_gif.gif

 

Thank you but all I did was talk to them. Nothing fancy. You easily can do that yourself if you'd only believe and put yourself out there.

 

There are women you'd love to meet who don't have rings on their fingers everywhere. And as it is summer they are showing plenty of skin. Go git em!!

Edited August 5, 2012 by Imajerk17

[brahmabull117]

Thank you but all I did was talk to them. Nothing fancy. You easily can do that yourself if you'd only believe and put yourself out there.

 

There are women you'd love to meet who don't have rings on their fingers everywhere. And as it is summer they are showing plenty of skin. Go git em!!

 

 

Still be very proud of yourself, those are not easy approaches

[Imajerk17]

Not meaning to cramp your style, but whenever a woman is that easy in giving out her number and agreeing to a date, they tend to flake, so just be prepared. But I'm sure it won't bother a guy like you.

 

Haha I do still take flaking/rejection harder than I ought to. Thanks for the props man!

[runner]

Yes, I like being approached as long as it's in a friendly and natural rather than cheesy (PUA style) way.

 

I was in the park earlier today, and a dog approached me to be patted. Dogs are naturals. I got talking to its owner, and before long there was a group of dogs (and a couple of men)around me. The human alphamale of the group, a man in his late 60s, asked me to ensure that I'm in the park tomorrow morning so that we can have a lively discussion about Thatcherism, Ayn Rand and the CIA.

 

That's about as close as I get to a date these days.

 

There is one of the dogmen, though, who I have a definite eye for. I've seen him around for a while, and we often chat. From his body language and eye contact he likes me back. When he came over today, I quickly switched the subject away from politics and onto something that I could be all girly and goo-eyed about (he really doesn't strike me as a political kind of guy).

 

I'm going to have to do a bit of exploratory work to find out if he's single. If he is, then he can definitely hit on me, but I don't know if he's got the oomph to do it. I can see us, in twenty years time, still not past the stage of exchanging eye contact and shy grins....so I could use a bit of advice here on what I could do to move this one forward a little.

 

next time your conversing (better yet, conversing and walking) with him, just pull a random, "hey wanna get some lemonade"; if yes, then up the fun/flirty banter. you should know pretty quickly if he's into you.

[brahmabull117]

Haha I do still take flaking/rejection harder than I ought to. Thanks for the props man!

 

 

Don't. It's like sales, flaking/rejection's part of the game

 

 

Keep pursuing until it's not worth the effort anymore then ignore. Dating is not logical for women, getting mad won't change anything and will likely just make things worse

[Imajerk17]

Don't. It's like sales, flaking/rejection's part of the game

 

 

Keep pursuing until it's not worth the effort anymore then ignore. Dating is not logical for women, getting mad won't change anything and will likely just make things worse

 

You're right. I've gotten much better in that regard.