Saw ex for first time in over a year

[Cutyluv]

Hi everyone. I really need some advice. I dated my exboyfriend for 4 years and we lived together, and then he broke up with me and told me that he couldn't see himself marrying me. Well, it has been about a year and three months since we have broken up, and he has been dating a new girl for about a year. I have never met his new girlfriend, and I cut off communication with the ex completely. I went to a wedding of one of our mutual friends this weekend, and I knew that he was going to be there and that the new girlfriend would be there as well. My friend told me that she called my ex to warn him that I would be there. We saw each other for the first time in over a year, and he didn't even talk to me. The whole time, I was being stared down by his new girlfriend, and he wouldn't even look at me. Me and my ex did not have a bad breakup at all, and it really hurt my feelings that he didn't even want to talk to me after so long. All of my ex's friends told me that his new girlfriend was extremely jealous and violent, and that she hated me even though she never met me. I have a feeling that if he would have talked to me that he would have been in trouble with his new girlfriend, but it still hurt my feelings a lot. I don't understand how someone can be a part of someone's life for 4 years, and then when he sees me after such a long period of time, he doesn't even say hello and see how I am doing. I also heard more about the new girlfriend this weekend, and I heard that she is trailer trash, violent, has a dirty mouth, has no goals in life, and all of my ex's friends hate her. I saw her and she wasn't pretty either. I treated my ex like gold, and I have a lot more going for me then she seems to have. I am beating myself up trying to figure out why he would go from me to someone like her. It just doesn't make sense. Any advice from anyone? Should I just stay out of their life? I have to admit that I still love him, but I know that he has a girlfriend right now, and I'm not one to try and interfere. What should I do?

[Miss_Prolixity]

Hi Cuty,

 

Seeing someone we were once involved with intimately on all levels can be troublesome. Even if the breakup was an amicable one.

 

You had mentioned that there had been no communication between you two for a year. So, a lot of time has passed. Perhaps he felt it was in the best interest of all parties involved (you, the g/f and himself) if he remained silent and distant. Especially if his new girlfriend is the jealous type, I'm sure he didn't want there to be any drama.

 

You ask if you should stay out of his life. I would have to say yes. Why interfere in a situation where you're not desired? If he wanted you as a friend, I'm sure he would've made you a priority and kept in contact, especially when he seen you at this wedding.

 

I know it extremely painful to think someone you've shared your life with could act as if you're non existent. But maybe that's the only way they can carry on with their own life. We all have different mechanisms to cope with in our daily lives, especially relationships.