Henry69 Posted August 5, 2012 Share Posted August 5, 2012 Okay, we'll this is something that has been concerning me for a while. I have buried my thoughts enough and need an outside opinion for my justification of what my girlfiend has done, and frequently continues doing. We met on new years eve, and immediately fell in love, moved in together amd were living in the honeymoon period. Things started to turn sour when she quit her job, and didn't make an effort to get a new one. This caused stress between us, not due to finances, but due to the fact that I needed to work and she did not support that. She would moan the hours I send out the house. I find this very rude, as I don't work a lot, and I provide her with a lifestyle that most women would die for. She says it's not about that, the real reason is because she is lonely and bored, and hates not earning her own money to give her the freedom she wants; even though it's not problem to ask me for help, I already support her. After this drama settled, she would always always complain about some kind of illness, be it aching pains, headaches, nausea, period pains, stomach bugs.. The works, she would always moan and in her tone of voice she would be suggesting it was my fault! This has been apparent throughout the relationship without fail, not to mention the anxiety attacks. She cheated on me with her ex after she told me she loved me, and to this day has still not been completely honest about what happened even when presented with incriminating evidence, she is in denial but admits to 'kissing' I forgave her, after reAlizing a kiss is not a big deal and my feelings for her were worth more than that to just throw it all away. So I held on, and noticed some of my mistakes in the way I behaved that I changed for the better good of our relationship. We were good for a few months, until she began to embarrass me in front of my friends by talking trash about me because we had just had an argument, showing no respect for me in public and not even realizing her behavior and attitude was completely wrong. Many of my friends are against her, and believe she is using me, has no respect and value for me. To top it off, I took her out the other night with a friend of mine and my mother And by end of the night she was grinding up on a friends leg and practically putting his c**k in her face! Denied it again, even though I could see with my own eyes. She is never thankful for what I do for her, and doesn't show the slimmest emotion of gratitude even after I take her out shopping for example.. It's all about her, and her headache, and her pains and the fact that she can't swallow her pills for a tooth ache is my fault blah blahblah. What do I do, I need some advice, I hope my jargon has made sense Above, thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
scatterd Posted August 5, 2012 Share Posted August 5, 2012 For one thing take her to the dentist, then sit down and have a talk with her. Tell her what you have been feeling but also let her know you love her. Maybe even go to a counselor she could be bored and depressed. Depression can make you ache and feel sick. From how you put things it sound like she wants attention from you even if its negative. She needs to find hobbies or something to keep her busy and to feel important. Let her know to keep your arguments between you both that she is embarrassing you and if she needs to talk about it to do it with you at home. Good luck 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Henry69 Posted August 5, 2012 Author Share Posted August 5, 2012 Wow, so simple and direct it makes a very good point. It is true, maybe I have been shying away from dealing with the issues and just thinking about it more and more, whilst it spirals into a manic confusion in my mind. When you say make her feel important, in what ways could this be done, or how do you mean exactly? Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
scatterd Posted August 5, 2012 Share Posted August 5, 2012 She feels she is not important anymore because she does not have a job or anything to show for her self. Encourage her that she is good at what ever she does best. You sound like a good man with true concerns. If she does not want to work she needs to find something to do that makes her feel good about herself. Also she has to feel needed for something just as you feel she needs you. Be kind but also let her know your needs. Try complimenting her and see if she starts to do it back also let her know you want to feel appreciated for your hard work you do for your family.She has for gotten what it is like to get up early and work all day. I hope this works. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
scatterd Posted August 5, 2012 Share Posted August 5, 2012 I do not think her being promiscuous should be allowed no matter what goes on. If she continues to give you a reason to not trust her this will ruin your relationship. When you talk to her make it understood that you will not allow her to do this no matter the circumstances. You are a man and deserve respect after all you work and take care of her. Link to post Share on other sites
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