FightClub Posted August 5, 2012 Share Posted August 5, 2012 (edited) Hey guys, I wanted to post this story as an example of how sometimes the things we have to go through in life prepare us for the eventuality that situations or life experiences can repeat themselves, only this time we see things clearly and make better choices for ourselves. Going to the gym regularly, I run into old friends or people I used to know in my past, one of those friends was a girl I knew in high school and later became good friends with for a while afterwards. At some point in our friendship, I recognized I wanted more than friends and when we became intimate at one point she had basically told me she saw me as a brother. It was at that point that all interest had dropped and I began to distance myself because I didn't see much of a future in continuing our friendship, so I basically disappeared. flash-forward several years, we randomly meet each other at the gym and have that awkward reunion, she and I had a very stand-offish demeanor and just occasional talked in passing. Around January she randomly started talking and asking for advice about possibly marrying her boyfriend and wondering why we stopped talking. I explained to her that I didn't see any reason to continue communicating because I didn't feel that she saw me in any other capacity as a friend, that I liked her back then but just moved on. Finding out just recently she is now married, yesterday she decided to say that she liked me too and wanted a relationship back then. ( I guess she forgot about the, 'you're like my brother' part. ) Also mentioned that her now husband gets jealous whenever he sees her try to chit-chat with me. Oh and here's amusing part, after telling me that she says we're having a party this weekend, I really want you to be there, I need my buddy by my side. At that point, a light-bulb went on, newly married and now unsure of the marriage, wants a potential stabilizer and free marriage counselor. Yeah, fortunately, I learned my life lessons from the exMW and recognized all the red flags. I declined the invitation, told her she's married and the only male 'friend' she needs to chit-chat with is her husband and marriage counseling would be best for her. Live and learn...don't repeat the past! -FC Edited August 5, 2012 by FightClub 10 Link to post Share on other sites
goodthingscome Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 Not a guy, but read your post and wanted to say, good job! Hopefully it will help others before they make a choice that will change/ruin their lives forever. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
East7 Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 At that point, a light-bulb went on, newly married and now unsure of the marriage, wants a potential stabilizer and free marriage counselor. Clarity is good Before the A, I would easily fall in those situations, assuming that someone who shares her scars would mean that she feels close to me and eventually likes me. Experience showed me that while sometimes some women can be real friends, the other face of the coin is that a woman who tells you her relationship problems is not interested in you in first place. She may look at you as a lover but not as relationship partner. After the A I have continously potential A situations with MW at work, social circle, etc...Highschool female friends are the most potential MW ever! Now I see it coming froms a mile away.. The patters are easily identifiable : An unloving or a rocky, unsure relationship, bored women, poor sex life, need for dreaming and reality escape. They ALL complain about husbands, how they are jealous, lazy, unloving etc etc. These women can be extremely seductive and easy-to-get when you play their game. The more you resist, the more they will chase you and as soon as you start to show feelings or attachement they will instantly cool off. It is often games. Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 Hey guys, I wanted to post this story as an example of how sometimes the things we have to go through in life prepare us for the eventuality that situations or life experiences can repeat themselves, only this time we see things clearly and make better choices for ourselves. Going to the gym regularly, I run into old friends or people I used to know in my past, one of those friends was a girl I knew in high school and later became good friends with for a while afterwards. At some point in our friendship, I recognized I wanted more than friends and when we became intimate at one point she had basically told me she saw me as a brother. It was at that point that all interest had dropped and I began to distance myself because I didn't see much of a future in continuing our friendship, so I basically disappeared. flash-forward several years, we randomly meet each other at the gym and have that awkward reunion, she and I had a very stand-offish demeanor and just occasional talked in passing. Around January she randomly started talking and asking for advice about possibly marrying her boyfriend and wondering why we stopped talking. I explained to her that I didn't see any reason to continue communicating because I didn't feel that she saw me in any other capacity as a friend, that I liked her back then but just moved on. Finding out just recently she is now married, yesterday she decided to say that she liked me too and wanted a relationship back then. ( I guess she forgot about the, 'you're like my brother' part. ) Also mentioned that her now husband gets jealous whenever he sees her try to chit-chat with me. Oh and here's amusing part, after telling me that she says we're having a party this weekend, I really want you to be there, I need my buddy by my side. At that point, a light-bulb went on, newly married and now unsure of the marriage, wants a potential stabilizer and free marriage counselor. Yeah, fortunately, I learned my life lessons from the exMW and recognized all the red flags. I declined the invitation, told her she's married and the only male 'friend' she needs to chit-chat with is her husband and marriage counseling would be best for her. Live and learn...don't repeat the past! -FC Great for you FC! It's so funny how you get these markers of growth, where it's like life presents you with the same/similar situations as one from the past, and if you've learned anything, usually your reaction to it, how it makes you feel, how you perceive it etc. differ greatly from before. It's always such a great feeling to truly measure your growth. You can almost never measure your growth in isolation or when you simply are never faced with such a situation again; rather, when you are presented with a former stumbling block ad side step it, it's such a triumphant feeling, like you truly did grow 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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