!!!!!! lost between two

[lostandcanifind]

There is my story,

 

I have a boyfriend of 3years and 9 months. We got engaged at the start of this year and are getting married at the end of this year. But recently (about one month ago), I had met a guy that I felt attractive to. The guy asked me for a kiss the second time we met but I refused. But since then I cannot get the guy out of my head. We kept in contact with each other and met each other when we got a chance to (He has got a girlfriend!). I saw the passion and sparks that I'd never had when I was with my fiance. But the guy seems not so decent and I could not see a future between us. There were so many times that I kept telling myself to stop thinking of him but I just cannot. I know in my mind I really want to see him every day. We kissed and had sex. He even took me to his place where he stays with his girlfriend when she was away. At the same time, I started to talk to my fiance less and went out more often with my friends. My fiance noticed the changes and asked me about it a few days ago. I felt so guilty about it but I did not tell him the existance of the other guy. I just told him that I love him but I could not feel the love any more. I also told him that I wanted seperated for a while to figure out if I do love him or not. My fiance did not want a split and asked me to give him one more chance. So I said yes. He tried so hard these a few days to try to save our relationship. However, the more that he did for me, the more guilt that I had. I do know what to do now. My fiance is a really nice guy and treat me like a princess. I cannot find anyone who loves me more than he does. But I still have strong feeling towards the new guy but he disappointed me sometimes because he seemed not so care about me. Now I am really lost and I don't know what to do. I know I am totally bad and evil doing all of these to my fiance. I just cannot tell him the truth because that would hurt him badly. And I am not sure if I still want to get married or be with my fiance. Can please anyone help me?

[madjac74]

Can anyone help you??? What about the two innocent victims in you and your lover's selfishness?

[lostandcanifind]

You are totally right. I am selfish and I am not trustworthy. I feel guilty every second and I do not know how to face my fiance.

Sometimes I hate myself a lot that I do not know how to say no. It would be totally different if i said no to the guy when he tried to kiss me.

 

Everyone, please feel free to tell me how bad I was. I need this to remind me how aweful i was for the rest of my life. I know i deserve to be alone.

[silicone]

It's women like you who's making me think twice about females in my life. You make me want to mistreat them. Women like you are such attention seekers.

 

Tell your fiance what you did and let him go, he deserves someone better than you.

[veggirl]

well, just a thought but it'd probably be easier to forget this guy if you a) stopped meeting up with him and b) stopped contacting him / responding to his attempts at contact.

 

You need to tell your bf you cheated on him.

[ScienceGal]

Classic GIGS. I've been there, although I had the decency to leave my boyfriend at the time before pursuing the other guy I was interested in. Bottom line, it's not worth it. You said yourself that you see no future with this new fella. So... what do you want? To end your long term relationship to have a hot sexy fling? Then what, get back to dating and find someone that you can be with long term?

 

I think you should take a step back and think about the relationship dynamic with your fiance. Why isn't it working for you? I'd be willing to bet that the spark for him dwindled when this other guy ignited it. You've been together for several years and you're getting married. Maybe you're bored, maybe you need to work on spicing up your relationship. I agree with veggirl, you need to stay away from this new guy. If your relationship with your fiance ends, it should not be for this guy.