babycrapgreen Posted August 8, 2012 Share Posted August 8, 2012 (edited) This has spanned the last 8 years of my life. I ended up becoming really close with a friend's friend and we became best friends. We would spend 7am to 10 pm on daily basis throughout college, just hanging out and having blast. Unfortunately, I was dating someone at the time. I didn't quite see him as a boyfriend because I had a boyfriend. I've had close guy friends before but, not like him, you know when you just understand someone, it was that sort of deal. After two years of being best friends, he, subtly confessed his feelings towards me, I couldn't break up with my bf, so he completely cuts off all communication. I couldn't be that person who breaks up with someone for another person, it's just not me.I come to find out he ends up dating his friend's girlfriend, 6-9months later, after I refused to break up with my bf. Yeah, drama, right? The next few years, we had little to no interaction, at friend's parties, one or two word exchanges, that's it. It was awkward to say the least. We were suppose to hangout and talk things out in 2007, 1 year after no communication, but, I don't think his gf at the time allowed him to, understandably. I received an apology email regarding how he handled the situation around the same time, I saved it but, didn't have the heart to email him back. I didn't want his gf to think I was trying to start something. Time passes, and in the mean time, I would get random greetings, I mean, the most obscure holidays to the major ones. I would receive random emails of notes we wrote back in college to eachother, in 2010, I would reply back, no response in return. I find out he broke up with his gf in 2010, I finally got the courage to reply to his email back in 2007 and apologize myself in fall 2011. I genuinely missed him, everything about him. I didn't get a reply til this year. He gave me his new number and I, text messaged him in July. We ended up text messaging daily since then. Reminiscing for the most part, I mean he remembers everything and I do too. From the most insignificant times to the most funniest. We finally hung out this past Sunday, I was nervous. I'm sure the tables have turned in regards to feelings. We laughed a lot and more reminiscing but, you can tell we were awkward at times. He didn't mention any girl he was dating. In fact, he only mentioned his ex because I asked. I'm in love with him. I want to make sure it's not him holding a grudge. I just don't know where to start. How do I know he still has feelings for me? How should I act around him? What signs to look for? Edited August 8, 2012 by babycrapgreen Link to post Share on other sites
Author babycrapgreen Posted August 9, 2012 Author Share Posted August 9, 2012 Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Link to post Share on other sites
Thorgs Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 Well, I'm not the best at this as you can see from my most recent thread but...was he acting nervous? Did he have anger in his voice or was he excited to see you? If you really do love him, why not tell him? Put your ego aside and take a chance. The hard part is the possibility of rejection, but would you rather know or never know? Link to post Share on other sites
Standard-Fare Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 I disagree that you should tell him you love him. I think that would be very sudden and overwhelming. I think you guys should just start hanging out and see where that takes you. See if you can rekindle a friendship first. While doing that you should be able to get a better sense of where he stands. See if that awkwardness goes away. Also, most importantly, see if you can move beyond the "reminiscing." That seems to be an aspect of your relationship that's too dominant -- harping on your past glory days. A relationship based on nostalgia and old ideas of yourselves is just not going to work. Link to post Share on other sites
Standard-Fare Posted September 4, 2012 Share Posted September 4, 2012 P.S. I just read another thread where you gave some other details, and it seems like you guys HAVE been hanging out a bit? How long has that been going on? How often have you seen each other, what type of stuff to do you together, and what's the general vibe? You mentioned in another post that once he brought up some girl, but you didn't really give details. I'm curious about that. Because you obviously do need to find out pretty soon if there's another lady in his life. Link to post Share on other sites
Author babycrapgreen Posted September 5, 2012 Author Share Posted September 5, 2012 Thank you for taking the time to ready my situation and answering it, I really appreciate it. To answer your questions, I've hungout with him a total of 3 times, last month. Once, the reminiscing. Twice in one week, eating and hanging out, like how we were before, hungout for 5+ hours. We've text messaged eachother daily, I mean, literally, as early at 5am to 10 at night since July. I think we're rekindling our friendship, for the most part, like your advice mention. How I found out he has a girlfriend, he was showing me something on his phone and I accidentally closed the window to his home screen which had a pic of girl, I asked who she was, he hesitated before saying it was his girlfriend. I was stunned to say the least since she was never brought up the 2 months we've been communicating and anytime his ex was brought up. I asked how come he never mentioned her, he said he didn't know. So, I asked how long they've been dating, basically, it sort of happened. It was a vague explanation to say the least. We still text message each other daily. I'm just don't understand his actions. Link to post Share on other sites
Author babycrapgreen Posted September 6, 2012 Author Share Posted September 6, 2012 Thank you for reading and giving me advice, I will eventually say something.. just waiting for the right time, I suppose. Just more time. Link to post Share on other sites
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