Guilt. Do you suffer it, even when you shouldn't?

[Thinkalot]

I do. Misplaced guilt. Misplaced idea of responsibility.

 

And such as wretched emotion guilt is, it robs you of power, and confidence, and fills you with self doubt and anxiety and worry. Most of it, useless.

 

I am much much better now at NOT feeling guilty...but every now and then, it still creeps up on me.

 

My guilt arises when I see my mum struggle, and know I am earning good money. Somehow I feel I should solve everything. But of course, I have my life to live with my partner, and my own goals and responsibilities.

 

Other times I feel guilt when I see someone less off than me, struggling. Same sort of scenario really.

 

Do you experience this too? What are your methods for beating it? Of course, sometimes guilt is valid, and shows we have some morals and a belief system, which we have perhaps failed to honour. Even then though, too much guilt is not productive.

[HokeyReligions]

Originally posted by Thinkalot

Other times I feel guilt when I see someone less off than me, struggling.

 

Let me relieve you of that guilt! Send money to: HokeyReligions @ xxxxxxx LOL!

 

 

I should just have the word GUILT tattoed on my forehead! I feel responsible for EVERYONE! I know I shouldn't, but I do and I just about kill myself trying to take care of everyone sometimes because the guilt if I don't makes me feel HORRIBLE! One reason I'm always broke is because I pay everyone's bills! I've paid utility bills and house payments, etc. for friends and family when they have come up short---because I've always been one to earn more. I can't do that anymore and not just because right now I don't have any money, but I just can't.

 

It was so bad that at one time I paid a friends mortgage and electric bill for two months (around $3,000) because he was having so much taken out of his paycheck and going into his 401k/retirement plan that he didn't have enough left to pay his bills. I took that money out of my savings. Now, he has a huge retirement fund and I have zero in savings because all the medical expenses wiped out everything I had ever saved!

 

It's something that I work on every day. I have to let go. I can't save the world. I can do what I can do and if I hurt myself in the process then I won't be much good for anyone. It's not selfish to take care of myself. This is my daily mantra!

[Matilda]

Yes!

[Fayebelle]

I apologize if someone steps on MY foot...like oops sorry I was standing under your shoe.

[msrealdoll]

I was so guilty all the time I sought therapy for it. It was really getting in the way of my happiness. The therapy helped a lot. Now, the only people that make me feel guilty are my father and daughter.

[anangel2be]

I will have to say i do feel guilty too. even if some of my firneds are having a bad day sometimes i think it is something i have done to them to make them have a bad day. i guess i have a very low slef esteem. and at one point in time i thought i had control over it but i dont guess i do. cause here lately i have been way down on myself. see i started ficing myslef up then i just got accused of trying to impress Rich the married guy at work so i dtill feel down. not anyting i do makes up for the guilt i often feel. other then that i am a very happy person.

[Olivia_19742004]

I definitely have issues with guilt.

[Thinkalot]

Originally posted by HokeyReligions

I have to let go. I can't save the world. I can do what I can do and if I hurt myself in the process then I won't be much good for anyone. It's not selfish to take care of myself. This is my daily mantra!

 

LOL Hokey! Sounds like you and I are learning some of the same lessons!

 

So what makes some of us more prone to feeling guilty than others? personality type? Upbringing? The emotional blackmail or demands of others around us?