mtber75 Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 I had this female friend and we shared some intimate moments together. We had a big argument about our relationship (whether its platonic or not, long story) about a month ago and now she ceased all communication with me. Even though I apologized for the things I said to her. The thing is I still want to hang out with her as friends. But she clearly don't want to hang out with me as friends either? What gives, why did she cut me off completely? Interestingly she's still friends with me on facebook? Link to post Share on other sites
valdeetz1 Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 More then likely she developed feelings for you and she's trying to cope with that and get past those feelings. She has initiated NC to help her move past it. It is very difficult for a female to remain friends with a male she cares about that doesnt return those feelings. This is why a lot of couples dont remain friends post break up. If you were good friends before- once she's moved on and gets past you she might contact you again. Link to post Share on other sites
lovejoy41 Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 You see mtber75, your situation is somewhat similar to mine. You commented on my post that I shouldn't be mad about finding out that my friend who I was dating for 5 years has a live-in gf even though I had no knowledge about it because he was telling me that he wasn't ready to commit & after I'd shared my feelings with him. Now you are inquiring about the status of your relationship, how your feelings play a part in it & she just went into NC. It doesn't feel good when people do things like this and even though my friend said what he said(and it was a lie), someone not saying anything at all isn't any better. It's a bit different when you're in a situation like this. Now how would you feel if you found out(god forbid) that she hasn't said anything else to you because she just walked away and decided to start something with someone else? I'm not trying to bash you, I'm just saying. She left without a word. My advice would to be stay neutral. If she is feeling something, she will contact you when she's ready to admit it and want to discuss it. If not, maybe she doesn't want a commitment with you and is afraid to tell you. It sounds crazy, but if I had a choice I would rather someone not say anything than to lie and I find out that they did want to commit, just not to me. This is what I was talking about with the whole "friends" thing. At some point you want to know where the relationship is going and you expect them to tell the truth, not lie or vanish when it's brought up. This is just my opinion. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mtber75 Posted August 13, 2012 Author Share Posted August 13, 2012 Thanks for the advise guys! The thing is that I was the one who blew up at her when she all of a sudden wanted to be strictly platonic (clear signs that this was heading into a relationship). I moved on at this point (she is NC for over a month) romantically, but I still would really love to hanging out with her because we had so much in common. I guess I am bummed that I lost a good friend over this! Link to post Share on other sites
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